Brain Storm - Cat Gilbert (top 10 inspirational books .txt) 📗

WHEN WE WERE finished, Mac and I headed over to the Best Western across the street. It was new and more along the lines of a Hilton Hotel than the usual BW’s that dotted the highways. Mac got two rooms. One for me and one for Mama D and Trinity to share. He and Jonas would camp out in the RV with the gold.

I slid my key card into the door and watched the little green light go on, indicating the lock had been opened. I slipped inside and immediately flipped on the bathroom light and smiled. My own private bathroom. One I didn’t have to share with anyone. Not that I minded sharing, but the idea of being able to take as long as I wanted in the shower without worrying about the hot water supply was all I could think about. I was still admiring the shower and stack of fluffy towels when the knock sounded on the door.

“I want to talk to you for a minute before the guys come up.” My illusion of privacy swirled away in the whirlwind that was Trinity, as she pushed past me into the room. “Look, I know you need some downtime, but I’ve wanted to say something to you since this morning, and there hasn’t been a good time to do it.”

“Okay.” I resigned myself to a discussion that I knew would last until the guys came up in the 30 minutes we had agreed on. “What’s up?”

“There’s a couple of things. First off, I want to apologize for what happened this morning. It wasn’t about the name.”

“I know that, Trinity. You don’t have to explain.”

“Yes, I do. I saw your face. I know you were angry, and you had every right to be. Don’t!” She stopped me before I could get a word out. “ Let me finish.”

She began to pace back and forth at the end of the bed. I felt a warm glow as I moved to take a chair at the computer desk across the room, waiting for her to continue. This wasn’t the nervous pacing that I’d been seeing since we’d been on the run. This was summation pacing. I’d watched her do this in the courtroom so many times I could probably tell you how many steps she’d take before turning. Trinity was thinking. Choosing her words just so, to make her point the best way possible. All the passion and drama that was Trinity, but none of the chaos of the last two days. She was back in control. Her body language told me what I needed to know. Now I needed to hear what she wanted to tell me.

“You were angry, but you were mostly scared. Scared, not only by what might have happened when you lost control but by what you were prepared to do when you came around that corner, riding to my rescue.” She stopped pacing to stand in front of me, hands splayed out on the desk as she leaned in to make her point. “Don’t think that I don’t understand what it cost you to kill those men in order to protect me. Or that I don’t realize you’d do it again in a heartbeat if you needed to.”

She started pacing again, gathering her thoughts. I kept quiet, not wanting to interrupt her train of thought. She was heading somewhere with all this, I just didn’t know where yet.

“I know you feel guilty that this all happened. I know you feel responsible. I know I have been making things more difficult for you while I tried to come to terms with things. I know all this, but there’re a couple of things I want to make sure you know before you make any decisions that effect all our lives.”

Well, she had my full attention now, and she knew it. She came to a stop in front of me, and this time got right down in my face, eyeball level.

“I want you to know that Grams and I love you. That we don’t blame you one bit for what happened. I want you to know that I’ve come to terms with it and that you can trust me to keep it together. Most of all though Taylor, I want you to know that if you can’t do what you need to because you’re afraid for us, we’ll leave. Right now. Tonight.”

She stabbed the desk in front of me to emphasize her point. I had been afraid I would have to send them away to keep them safe and here was Trinity offering it to me on a silver platter. All I had to do was agree with her, and they’d be gone.

“What do you want, Trinity?” I asked softly. “It’s your life.”

“What do I want? I want to stay. I think we’re better together than apart! But not this way. Not with you afraid to move because it might expose us or put us in danger. We can’t hold you back, and as long as you feel guilty, you’ll play it safe. You have to do what you’re best at. So you decide. I just wanted you to know, I have your back if you want me.”

She turned and walked out the door, leaving me sitting there with my mouth hanging open. What just happened? Did I just get yelled at for trying to protect her? I think I did. Was she right? The epiphany I’d had with the cows on the roadside to not run, meant nothing if I deceived myself about the reason I was staying. If I could sweep away the feelings of guilt and the gripping need to protect them, what was left?

Twenty minutes later, when Mac knocked on the door, I was still sitting in the same place, but I wasn’t the same person. The transformation wasn’t complete, and I wasn’t sure what I would be when it was finished, but the roots were taking hold. I knew what I had to do next. I just wasn’t certain how to go about it. Trinity had just cleared that up for me. I felt a shiver of anticipation run up my spine, as I crossed the room to open the door.