Beamer, The life of a Not So Ordinary Dog - Hunter T. (read an ebook week .txt) 📗

Ch. 1
Hi. I’m Beamer, my family calls me “Beeb,” “Beebish,” or “Beeber,” for short. Let me tell you a little bit about myself.
I’m a large, black and red, German Shepherd dog. By the way, I know what you’re thinking, you probably think I’m like a lot of other dogs, like the dogs that just sit at home and eat kibble. Well I’m not. First of all, I eat raw chicken, not kibble, because raw chicken is way better for dogs, kibble is just grains, grains are awful for dogs. Also, and I don’t mean to alarm anyone but, most kibble, it’s actually made from other dogs. So basically, it’s like cannibalism.
Anyway, I’m with a loving family in California, and I’m their housedog, not just a housedog though, I belong to a family who shows and raises dogs! It doesn’t sound exciting, but it is. All of the other dogs blab about it when they get home. The other dogs (the ones that stay home) are really jealous. I start to feel bad for them, but I forget about it when I get to the shows. If I’m lucky, it’s not a regular show, it’s a road trip and a show! We are going to northern California for a dog show in about three days.
I’m in a cone, like a lampshade cone, hopefully I don’t have to wear it to the shows or I will get laughed at so much I just might howl. I just wish humans could tell whether when you howl, you’re so annoyed you’re screaming, or you are singing. My
hotspot. My cone is huge, and clunky. Whenever I pass by a wall, I bang against it with my cone. Sorry to change the topic, but I overheard Mom say that we might be getting a beta fish soon. I hope Hunter still pays attention to me if we do. He probably will, he is my best friend. Oh, I’m sorry, the people in my family’s names are, Hunter, Kaitlyn, Dad, and Mom. Mom and Dad are what I call my, well, mom and dad, I guess. My mom is worried about packing and things like that for the trip. I’m not allowed to go in my crate, because Mom’s afraid I’ll lie on my hotspot and make it worse. I’m just going to keep acting pathetic to kind of will her into it. Everyone says it wont work, but I think it will. Anyway, whenever we go to a hotel, Hunter doesn’t feel safe when it’s just him and I. I don’t know why, and I guess I never will. Last time we were in northern California, I thought the second-story window was a door to another room, and I almost jumped out. Luckily, I wasn’t tall enough, and Mom stopped me.
I almost forgot to tell you, I was born and raised here. I have been loving it for the past three years! “Clang!” my cone banged against my crate. “Stupid crate! Why can’t you open for me?” I thought.
Ch. 2
In two days we finally get to go to Northern California. I can’t wait to get there. I’m still not allowed in my crate, and it’s really bugging me. I’m used to being in my crate every single day for most of the day and I don’t think I can take much more of this. I’m not too excited about the drive. It’s a six or eight hour drive, and it’s miserable. I do like to (whenever I’m not sleeping) take a peek through my crate window on drives like that. Hunter usually responds by sticking his fingers in my crate to pet me. I do like eating on the go, I don’t know why but, I guess this place just gets boring. I’m also happy about this because that little twerp “Bo” is going to be gone for a while, or, at least while we’re gone. “Bo” is a two-month-old puppy we’re training. He jumps on me and scratches my sides, he kind of steams my corn. He isn’t even the same breed as me! I’m a German shepherd he’s a Miniature Australian Shepherd. Well, no need to lose my good mood about that. On the other hand, I’m feeling a little better than I was yesterday,
have a shot at the biggest yard in town. I’m waiting to go out there so I can say “Hello” to my little chicken friends out there, if you know what I mean.
A few months later... Darn, I lost my journal. I eventually found it buried under the Carrot wood tree in our front yard. I sniffed it out, and found out my archenemy Bo had it. It was buried SO deep. For a little dog, he can sure dig. Well I suppose you want to know how our trip to Sacramento went. So lets start from the beginning...
We woke up really early in the morning and got ready. We were taking some other dogs, so it was a chore. Hunter had packed most of his stuff in one grooming bag. I had nothing to say after that, just wondering how he did it. Once we were loaded we headed for Sacramento. I was a little worried when we stopped to go to a Wal-Mart, but we just needed ice. We drove past many places, Pasadena, fields, stinky cows. We all eventually fell asleep, except for Hunter, he seemed to be excited. To this day, I don’t
sheer excitement of getting out of that stuffy van. When we got there, I was in deep trouble. This is embarrassing to say but, I pooped on the carpet. Yup, DEEP trouble for that little stunt.
Ch.3
Unfortunately, I did not show in the dog show. My friend, Tarragon did, and she got Reserve Best in Futurity. Pretty good huh? “ HEY BO! DON’T TOUCH THIS JOURNAL! RIIIIPPPP!
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Bo!
More silliness available soon!

Publication Date: 08-11-2012

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