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"Amber, can you tell me what you remember?" the blond woman asked.Well,of course I can't.I haven't spoken since my 12th birthday.
"I know you can't speak,but write it down." she gave me a note book and a pen.
"What was your first memory?"
My first memory...Well, I was about 2, I was taller than most kids my age. I was living with my Nana in North Carolina. It was the summer time and there were twins that lived down the street from me. We were very close, and they were about a year older than me. They asked me if I wanted to go to the beach with them. Now, when I was a kid, I knew things that no other 2 year old could comprehend. I went to the beach with them and swam in the water with them. We had conversations, my Nana said that I could talk unusually well for a 2 year old. That was my first memory.


The woman read it and nodded. I didn't even know why I had to be here.
"What was your second?" she pushed her red glasses up. I sighed and rolled my eyes.
How about I just write all of them down?


She looked at it and nodded.
Second Memory:
My second memory was with the twins, I was still 2. They told me they wanted me to go to church with them. I agreed. But, the weird part is...I don't remember what happened at church. All I remember is running outside with all the other little kids and hitting the pinata. That same day we went exploring in the back yard of the white abandoned house across from mine. The grass was more like wheat, golden and long, coming up to my knees. While we were exploring, I remember a woman with us, but did not know her name,only that I had a feeling that I was safe with her. We found a turtle in the yard. I guess the twins had never seen a turtle before. They asked what it was. Before the woman could answer, I told them it was a turtle. I don't know how I knew what it was. The woman turned and smiled at me. She said it was a snapping turtle and that we could tell how old it was by the rings on it's back.
"Like the way you tell how old a tree is right?"I asked. She nodded.
Third Memory:
Well, it was my birthday, May 12th, I was turning 3. I had walked into the house with my book bag on my shoulder. At the top of the stair case was a banquet of balloons that said happy birthday in big letters. I ran up the steps and looked at them. There was a letter and of course, I opened it. It was from my uncle Rob, saying that he loved me and said happy birthday. Even if it was my birthday, I still had chores to do. My Nana was not the type of woman to beat me if I did not do my chores, but I felt like I owed her. I was sweeping the the carpet when I started dancing. Not the baby little bending at the knees and popping p dancing, more like ballroom dancing. I started singing a song that to this day I can not remember. My Nana saw me and laughed, asking me what I was doing. I stopped and looked at her with my eyes.No one knew what color to call them, either light brown, hazel, or amber.
"Nothing." I replied, going back to sweeping, but still humming that tune.
Fourth Memory: My best friend(I don't remeber her name) and I were on the bus when I got an idea.
"Let's switch clothes." I told her.
"Why?" I just shrugged. I don't know why.When we had switched clothes, we both off at my stop, she lived around the corner from me so the bus driver didn't fuss. I tried to open the front door. It was locked. I smiled and pulled open the garage door.I was also a little stronger. On the little table was a plate with a bagel with cream cheese on either half and a glass of orange juice. We shared it. An hour later she went home and my Nana pulled into the drive way.
Fifth Memory:
Preschool was over. I had just finished my graduation ceremony. My other brother and sister left to go with my mom already in second grade I think. Now, it was just my brother Joseph and I.For some reason, we slept down stairs that night. I remember waking up, feeling scared for my life. My brother was on the pull out bed while slept on the floor. I jumped up and ran over to him, a sick feeling in my stomach. I put a little hand over my mouth as I looked into my brother's hair. Little pink worms were crawling in and out of his hair, it was the same way in my dream.I quickly turned on the light. The little things I thought were worms were strings from the carpet. How they got in his hair beats me. I told him about it in the morning, but he said I must have been dreaming.
Sixth Memory:
Today was the day I moved back to Rochester with my mom. My brother and I were already on the plane. It was called "JetBlue". I remember eating the nasty little peanut packets and little plastic cups of soda I had on the way. I don't remember who picked us up, from what I was told, I had fell asleep.
Seventh Memory:
I was in the car with my mom,I was 5 years old,and on my way to my new school. Saint Andrews was the name.
"I thought I had to be six to be in first grade."I told my mom. She only looked at me and smiled. I remember how I was so nervous about meeting my class. That was the day I met Brianna. We had become friends on that day.
Eighth Memory:
Ah,my first crush. His name was Jamar, I had forgotten his last name. Another girl, her name was Egypt, she also liked him. Jamar knew we liked him,but never said anything about it. Jamar and I were thought of as a couple around school, how that got around I have no idea. At the end of the day,when I was in the car, the song Jawolly came on and my friend Jawolley from class rode past. I smiled at her and waved.
Ninth Memory:
I missed school one day. My mom wasn't home so I didn't go to school.There was a knock on the door.
"Hello?" I told the woman.
"Why are you at home?" she asked.I raised an eye brow.
"My brother forgot to wake me up." As I said this, she nodded and walked away.Weird was what I thought.
Tenth Memory:
I was at a party. With my sister at my Aunt Reesie's house( We lived in the same apartment complex). She wasn't my real aunt, but the closest one we had in Rochester. My sister was dancing with Bashere(Bash-air), Reesie's son. I was in the corner, watching, and waiting.
Eleventh Memory:
It was a Saturday morning. I slept in my mom's room on my futon.I was awake, btu for some reason, didn't get up. My mom's room door creaked open.I made a whining noise and it stopped. My eyes locked on the door. A small,fragile looking, pale hand came through the crack.I made another whining noise, a little louder this time. The hand stopped it's advance.I was quiet. It came in further, a long, slender, equaly pale looking arm followed. I whined louder and it quickly shot out the door, my mother had woken up.
"Come on." she said as she opened the door.I quickly got up and followed her. Once we were down stairs, breakfast was on the table and everyone was about to eat.I narrowed my eyes and glared at my small pancake. That was a really mean joke.
"Who did it?" I asked.Everyone looked at me. They had no idea what I was talking about.
"Who did what?" my sister asked.
"Who put their hand through mommy's door?"
"I did." my sister confessed. I looked at her hands. She was lying.Everyone's hands at this table was tan, not pale. I glared at them all as they were eating.
Twelfth Memory:
I was really sad. Breanna was moving away.
"How about we make a doll version of you." I told her. She nodded. When I went home, I got some baby powder and foam legs. I poured baby powder on the foam and began patting it. My mom walked in.
"What are you doing?" she asked.
"Making a version of Breanna so she won't move away."
That plan didn't work. She ended up moving.
Thirteenth Memory:
It was Valentine's day. I was in the middle of handing out my candy to my class when I was called to the office. When I woke up, I was sitting in a big room with my brothers and my sister.
"You can pick one thing to keep from this pile." a woman said. I picked a fuzzy pink bathrobe that wentnpast my ankles. I couldn't remember what everyone else got, and frankly, didn't care.


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Publication Date: 10-01-2011

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