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to work and I just wanted to go back to bed.
On the way to Parliament House I fell asleep in the
back seat but when we stopped at the private entrance I
had my eyes open ready to attack the day. Marching into
my office I started going through my agenda for the day,
all the appointments and meetings, pages of information
that I had to read through, but all of a sudden I felt dizzy
and disoriented. Falling into my chair I took some deep
breaths and put my feet up on the desk, and soon began
to feel better and started my days business.
Somehow everyone I talked to appeared boring or
I had the feeling that they were not quite telling the truth
I found myself nodding my head saying the right “yes's,,
“no's„ and “that’s interesting„ at the right places.
Everything my eyes saw appeared colourless and almost
grey and always this feeling of emptiness within my body.
Maybe I should make an appointment to see Doc Weber
before my annual check-up comes up. Anyway I tumbled
through the day without making any grave mistakes and
now here I am on the banks of the Murrumbidgee getting
some exercise and fresh air - trying to find my way back
into a life where I can once again feel good about what I
am doing.
I kept on running, listening to the sounds of the
river and my breathing, when all of a sudden I lost my
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balance and falling to the ground I felt the earth give way
benath my legs and I started sliding down an
embankment towards the river, hitting my head on a
rock. Everything went black and I heard nothing but
silence.

“John wake up! Its time for a change, open your
eyes!„
I did just that and I was looking into the deepest, blackest
eyes I had ever seen in my entire life. The eyes belonged
to the face of a very old, black man, wrinkled and scarred,
he stood naked in the sun carrying a spear in his right
hand and a Woomera hanging from his shoulder. He
offered me his arm, and standing shakily with the help of
this strange man I said. “Who the hell are you? and what
are you doing here? What happened to me? I have a
terrible headache and my men are probably searching for
me and getting very worried - so if you want to kidnap
me do it right now!„ The stranger looked deeper into my
eyes and passed his right hand slowly in front of my eyes
and whispered in a soft enticing voice
“Let your pain become smoke and your worry a
river mist rising in the dawn.„
“Hey what was that? The headache’s gone and for
the first time in months I feel lighter than a sixteen
wheeler truck!„ The strange man remained silent and
turning into the Tea tree scrub he motioned for me to
follow him. There was a winding path going down to the
river and the air started to get cooler. I could feel a light
breeze that was scented with Wattle. I had no idea where
I was going but at the same time I had a feeling of Deja vu
as if I already knew what was going to happen. Soon we
came to the edge of the river and there, sitting on a large
rock; was a small Aborigine girl singing softly and trailing
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her hand in the slowly flowing water. The old man looked
into my eyes and said.
“This is the girl with nine toes, she will change
your life.„ and then he simply disappeared. I was shocked
and as if hypnotised I went to the rock and sat opposite
the girl with nine toes.
“Welcome to my home Turawwa - do you want to
live or die?„
I looked at her, seeing a face that was full of wisdom and
purity and at the same time innocent as a small child, she
had the beginning of a smile on her lips. I stuttered.
“Live of course!„
“Okay Turawwa if you really want to live you must
change many things in your life, especially your thoughts
and what you believe in. Your very thoughts create your
reality whether good or bad.„ Her voice sounded like
singing and I could not see her lips moving, her head
bobbed from side to side and her yellow eyes were
shining. Even though I had no idea what was happening,
I could remember the stories that the Aborigines told
about a girl with nine toes. Stories that I never really
believed. I listened, watched and felt what this little girl
with nine toes wanted to tell me.
“You are Turawwa this means leading with the heart.
You were chosen long ago to lead this country into a
future where all people prosper, regardless of there
colour or beliefs. This is your challenge. The way will not
be easy and it will take a long time. But first you must
decide if you are willing to give everything you have, even
your heart, to walk this path. Close your eyes - go inside
and ask your inner self if all parts of you, inside and
outside, conscious and unconscious, of the past, present
and future are willing to fight together at your side
through this life change change life process, always to
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stand by your side and support you with all that they have
- yes or no?„ I closed my eyes and even though the
instructions were strange, I found myself asking all parts
of my body if they were willing to support me in what
was happening to me - even though I had no idea what it
was. I got a load of yes's and a tingling feeling in my
belly. I said “YES!„ and opened my eyes. She then said;
“There is only one truth and that is the truth that you
yourself believe in. Your first challenge is to learn to trust
your innerself, your intuition, your teacher inside. This
may be difficult - there are people out there who do not
agree with what you say or what you decide. They will
attempt to manipulate you, to force you to make
compromises. They may even try to pressure you with
threats or promises. But whatever they say you must
stand up for your own beliefs and decisions, it does not
matter what the consequences are. If you stand like the
tall Gum tree with your roots firmly planted in the soils
of trust within yourself, the winds of change will do the
rest!„ She then asked me to put my hand on my belly
where I felt the tingling sensation. “This is your centre,
the place of power and certainty, whenever you feel out
of balance or unsure of a decision place your hand here
and feel the warmth. Now imagine forming a connection
between your mind and this place, and allow yourself to
take advice and listen to the voices coming from this part
of you, all answers should come from your centre. With
practise this will become second nature to you.„
I stood up feeling surprisingly awake and looking
down at her feet where for the first time I saw that she
really did have only nine toes! I heard somebody calling
my name. I looked up to the embankment and saw Rick
one of my bodyguards waving his arms frantically
shouting for me to climb out of the gully. I started to say
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“Wait, I want you to meet the girl with nine toes…!„ but
when I looked back to the water the rock was empty.
I climbed up to where Rick and Joe were waiting for
me telling them how I fell down the embankment and hit
my head. They looked at me in a funny way and Rick said
“But there are no scratches or anything boss and you
were only gone for about two minutes anyway - are you
feeling okay?„
“I feel better than I've felt in a long time boys, lets
go home!„


13


Believe in yourself its worth it!


Chapter 2

14

John opened his front door and called out to his
housekeeper Joan to come into his office. She walked
slowly up to him and said. “Yes sir, dinner is almost
ready.„ In her usual sharp, somewhat detached voice.
John laid his right hand on his belly took a deep breath
and said “Joan wait - I don't know exactly what’s going
on with you, or what you really think of me, but over the
last two years I can't help feeling that you are pissed off
with me about something. I want you to have the courage
to tell me what's bothering you? what have I done to
upset you?„
Joan’s mouth dropped open , she couldn't believe what he
had just said. She had been working for this family for over ten
years and the Boss had never spoken with her with so much
openness and honesty, why he even said pissed off! Woww ! This is
really new, something could be changing at last. She thought as
she slowly closed her mouth and started to speak.
“Does this mean I can say what I really think and
feel, even if it might hurt you sir, and I won't get fired?„
John looked straight into her eyes pressed his hand a little
bit harder to his belly
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