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As I look back now at my life at the hour of contentment, it has already passed...,

That at the grand ole age of eighty five,
Iv'e just begun to even learn !

The view from this place is nothing nearer that waht it is for you my dear Lord !

Like Abraham before him his obedience was the key to faith and life eternal..,

Oft' I'm left here surrounded by the mere beauty of the one who spoke to my heart so very eloquently,

You see, if you stay still one could hear his still small voice,

Kathy my dear love is gone now and I'm left in this cabin to pray to my creator !


With all the craziness outside, has now blinded most people from the reality that lies above,

The hustle and bustle with the vanity of all vanities !

Slowly but yet gently, I began to reach out my hand for help,

Then I got slapped across my face !
With the world searching but only has to open their heart door in order to let him in !

Now I just got in, took a walk outside my cabin, stretched then made a great big yawn !

Heading out very early today in order to fetch some rabbit and man was I ever so hungry !

Looking down at the creek I looked at the mere reflection of myself in the water..,

Is this me ?

Eighty five now and withering away faster and faster !

Also in the reflection is a picture of myself,

I saw a beautiful rainbow full of red, blue and green.. !

I looked around to count the many blessing's from above,
Even though my beloved bride was gone,

Kathy and I lived in a very small town in Arizona,
On the border line of Phoenix..,
We both worked in the ministy helping from broken home,
At the Baptist Church right near our home,

Helping other's brought on a togetherness to a close net family way,

By giving them each a bit of love,
Which in turn brought us more love that was sent from above !
Thinking back now, Kathy was really very shy,

Yet myself, on the other hand,
Was very out spoken..,

With dealing with those very issues in our relationship,
Being married for well over thirty five year's now,

In my early twenties, I could look at Kathy and there wasn't anything that could get in our way..,

It was by God's grace we were in love the entire marriage,

Sure there were those arguments but always were in union together..,

In my thirties I started to get a double chin, poy belly and out stretched forehead,

What no hair piece, you may ask ?

Just writing this makes me tired I think I'll sleep for a while to try to get some shut eye..,

Now in my dreams now at eighty five, I picture Kathy and I holding hands while doing devotions in prayer,

There was always a tender moment kissing those soft lips of her's..,

People would oft' say I'm a loner up here on a great big mountain,

With nothing but bears, rabbits and squirrel's..,

Yet that doesn't really scare me in the least ,

Now where was I, 'Oh, Yes' in my forties I gave a sermon at a church that was across the way in Summerville..,

A small community, population of 10,000 people,
While there standing at the pulpit ready to begin my sermon,
This huge fly tried to sit on the rim of my glasses,
embarrassed..,

I had chuckled to change the atmosphere of my embarrassment..,

I started with the words, "Fly, Fly, Fly... I will Fly away to be with the only one !

Ending it with, "I'm so happy with the church's baseball team with all those lovely pop flies !

There was never a time in all my life that Kathy and I were so much in love !

That very bond of true love !
The key ingredients of peace, joy and love to our marriage..,

There was this pond out on Stone Creek, a little ways from our home where we used to o chit chat and cuddle,

At that time which was our favorite resting place,

On one such occasion, Kathy and I tipped toed to the very edge of the pond,

Kathy had come from behind me to scream !
All of a sudden, I went head first into the water,
It was so surprising, well we laughed so hard the misses almost wet her pants,

It was on those certain occasions such as those when I would read poems that Iv'e written to Kathy..,
Still, one sticks out in my mind to this very day:


The Touch
-----------

The sun breaks through,
Out on that cool brisk morn,
Time was drawing near to my beloved dear..,
The message of hope brought about a smile to my face,

A very warm embrace, gently darling Kathy how your eyes,
Twinkled in the sun light..,
Bringing back memories of our youth into focus,

How the time surely goes by..,

Let us never depart,
Truly to the bitter end !
My beloved..,


--------------

I had read that to her on a day I was really very tired;
After I got a nice embrace I came to my senses and woke up !

I awoke to the mere beauty of God in his great creation !

Not just what's around me physically but what is at work internally as well,

Kathy never looked so beautiful on that day and I will always treasure that memory as long as I shall live !

There was also a time when Kathy and I were eating dinner,
I must have been in my fifties when all of a sudden a big rock came flying through our window,

First startled, I ran for Kathy's protection..,

Then that was it, the blood streaked down her head !
It was very serious, so I quickly called for an ambulance,
Frantic was I looking out at the window,

However, no given sign of anybody to help !
Screaming at the top of my lungs !

No, No, Kathy, why, this can't be !

The ambulance pulled into the driveway, but it was far too late !
Time had flashed before my eyes, events, moments and the internal focus on our love was not lost forever !

During the most critical and horrible moments of my life,
I had started to just lose my mind !

Looking down at all the tile on the floor trying to regain conciousness..,
There really was a peace comforting me that only comes from above !

After visiting at the cemetary three times,
I had known it better to just pack it up and to just move on !
Having then no idea where to go on th bright sunny morning..,

I got into my sixty eight Volkswagon to go and say my good bye !
To my beloved :

Leaving behind that little town, I headed up north to seek the ultimate, "Mountain Top Experience",

At just fifty five, what a crisis I managed to pull myself through with the help of the man upstairs..,

Finally sixteen hours of driving, a quarter of a tank of gas left,
I found my destination in Brownstone, Canada..,

That first night of my stay, after driving so very long,
I had camped near a small creek located two miles from Brownstone..,

I was just resting on the driver's side door with a very fluffy red pillow for comfort,

When all of a sudden aflash light came peering through the window,

Startled, at first I had jumped up very quickly,
I looked down at my watch it was 3:45 am,
Still half asleep, I turned my window down a turn and that is when Officer Smith was starring me right in my face..,

License and registration please !
Which was the officers reply,
Quickly, I came to my full senses, shook my head to get all the conwebs out !

Here you are officer, his reply was:


"What is an old farmer like yourself doing out in these parts ?"

In replying, "Officer, I'm headed to Brownstone to my plot of land I had my eyes on it !

The officer replied, "Hope ya got a shot gun, mighty big bears up a yonder ?"

It had struck me at that moment, here I am Henry Livingstone a man struck from the untimely death of my beloved wife and heading toward a destination that really I did not know of ?

Upon arriving, I was dazzled with the way the sun had peaked threw over the horizon..,

That very place just looked like what a home should be,
Wonderful, log cabin abandoned and it had my name on it !

After getting things out of my car,
I made my way to the place,
Then this huge Bob cat came running out the door !
Instead of running, I had remained very calm and intact,

I had remembered what my grand daddy had said about being around wild animals,

It was best just to remain still and do not even bother to move !

Therefore, content as a weasel the animal made his way toward me..,
One step at a time,
Growling, I woldn't even bother to nudge,

Step by step coming a bit closer this beast was approaching with great intensity with long drooping lips..,

However, as he came closer this great beast was approaching with great intensity..,

Then something very mysterious happened,
That only the man upstairs could ever allow !

The cat started purring and wanted me to pet him,
I just couldn't believe it,
Here I am out in Brownstone, my wife had just been hit by a huge rock !

I get stopped by the police man and what appears to have been the end for me !

The Lord had turned into a true blessing for me by meeting a true lovely friend !

I grew close to that cat as I settled in that cabin,
For the very first time in my life,
The peace of being alone to know that I don't have major responsibilities to deal with anymore..,

It was very refreshing for me !

As the years went by hunting and fishing then grew closer to my animal friends..,

It made me rrealize that I'm really never alone even though there's days I cry I always feel very well protected !

In my late seventies after many cold winters and fever bisters..,
I had decided to go back home to visit Sommerville,
To present a sermon on the whole basis of the outdoors experience,

Having had many tears experience I began saying:

"Bobcats, does anyone here like Bobcats ?
Miracles in a very far away place with you and the nature that God hath supplied..,

A tear dripped down my face when getting the next words out,

'Just when I thought the end was getting quite near,
When I had thought there's no hope at all !
A true friend named Bob approached me

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