Rude Awakening - Allan Deya (ebook reader computer .txt) 📗

face was not one of genuine shock as he asked, “Isn't it obvious?”

“No, I rather think it isn't.” Drew told him.

“You know for a genius your powers of deduction sure do suck, I mean look at him, look!” You can be sure the entire room, even the gym instructor Mr. Larrimore who had just been ushered into the room craned his neck to see.

“Okay I’m obviously a tad rusty after summer break so maybe you could enlighten me.”

“If I’d known I would be wiping your ass even here, I might have opted for a different school. Look at his funny shaped head; the way they are pressed at the side and his scrunched up face. It’s obvious I should think that dude's dad is gay.”

Andrew was the first to break the silence, again. “How on God’s green earth did you come to that conclusion?”

“My word, do I even have to flush the frigging john for you too? His head's shaped funny coz the muscles that produced him aren’t suited for letting out such huge pieces of shit and it follows that his face would be scrunched up coz the ass hole that he crawled out of was stanky.”

The laughter did not come immediately; the joke was intricately interwoven into the insult which in turn was camouflaged in a matter of fact tone and a straight face. But when it did it came in gales. Some laughed till they had tears in their eyes, others till the banging of their tables sent their lunch trays to the ground.

Some laughed so much they farted, and when somebody in that vast crowd shouted out ‘Marty just got a baby brother’, the hilarity increased tenfold. “Son of a bitch.” Marty yelled and rushed him. Having seen what happened to Brock, his friends backed up his charge.

Like a slow moving very bad day for the bullies documentary on the discovery channel, Nisa came off the seat with a thunderous uppercut to Marty’s jaw which was converted to a pounding on the crown for the next unfortunate soul.

Without a break in stride, his left leg shot out and connected with someone’s throat. Before his choking form hit the ground; in a move almost too fast to be human, his right leg was whizzing just over the former’s head and pounding the side of the head of some other fool.

The same momentum is what he used to prop his foot on the table and further propel himself backwards over their heads. As he came down he delivered a shattering blow to the back of a Tony's head, ducked a chair aimed at his head and with that same hand caught the chair thrower under the arms. Raising him in the air, he slammed the guy down hard and fast.

He spun on his back, then his head and finally on his hands and with those movements continuously kicked some 4 who were running his way to submission. When he was sure they were down for the count he switched his assault rotation lower, knocking them off their feet.

As he stood up Ross, one of the tight ends swung a bench at him. Nisa bent over backwards; literally and managed to avoid it. Because he had swung with might and speed, it took Ross a moment to slow down and turn. By the time he did Nisa was once again on his hands, only this time his legs were curled all the way to his chest.

“Cheese!” he said and gave the bottom of Ross’s massive jaw a mighty kick. He was all the way across the hall by then.“Y’all boys better not have spilled my dessert.” He warned in a dire voice. “That’s the best part of a meal.”

There were six still standing; they looked at each other and it was apparent what was running through their minds. Almost the entire gang had been annihilated in a matter of minutes by some guy who they had not as much as managed to scratch.

Something beeped. “Hotdamnit!” Nisa cursed, “Thanks alot boys. Really thanks, now I won't be able to bloody enjoy my pudding.” He told them, snoozing his phone alarm and streaking past them to the door.

There was a mass of bodies on the floor, some writhing in agony, others stock still; most of them weeping in one form or another. The room was transfixed on Drew. “Ha! Ha!” well that was… yeah, I’ll be on my way now.”

5 minutes later people were still talking about what had just happened. Like a magic trick Andrew had gone from the much assaulted champion of the underdog to a point of interest. A sudden hush filled the hall so suddenly, so completely; like somebody had pressed mute on a remote.

“I forgot my pudding.” Nisa told them as he picked it up and walked off. He paused at the door and without looking back told the gathering. “I know it goes without saying, but I’ll say it anyway, anyone screws with that boy again and I will destroy them.”

He didn’t need to specify who 'that boy' was, nor did he have to follow up that warning with a look or another threat. That he could deliver on that promise was evident on the ground before them. “I hope this does not decrease the chance that we can all still be friends.”

Imprint

Publication Date: 08-05-2010

All Rights Reserved

Dedication:
To those who only need one hand up.