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Since I was a little girl I’ve always thought about my wedding. Through the years, I have planned every little detail from the wedding party all the way down to the flowers and the little candies that set on the tables. The one scenario that I have tried not to think about is my proposal. In my mind, this is off-limits. I don’t want to build a scenario in my head, and then be disappointed by the actual thing. But when James dropped down on his knee, I was totally blown away. Nothing could’ve prepared me or even reduced the shock of his proposal.
~ ~ ~
As I walked into the coffee shop, I was warmly greeted with the warming smell of coffee and cinnamon bread, a common favorite among the many college students in the town. It is a quaint little shop, but that’s what makes it so inviting. I strolled to the fireplace and sat in an unoccupied chair, a rarity as the shop is almost always brimming with people. I popped open my laptop and began scrolling through my e-mails. ‘Blah, blah, blah…’ I thought as I emptied out my mail box. ‘Nothing good’. I was just about to exit from my e-mail, when another e-mail popped up. It was from my boyfriend, Brian.
Hey sweetie. Just wanted to send a little message your way and let you know how much you mean to me. Do you want to go out for dinner tonight? I call you after work. Well, hope you’re having a good day! Love you! ~Brian I clicked out of my mail and shut my laptop. Leaned back in my chair and sighed. ‘Why hasn’t Brian ever said something about marriage? We have been going out for seven steady years. We had our fights, but we’ve gotten through them. Does he not picture me being his wife? Am I not that person? If so, why hasn’t he said something? Why is he continuing our relationship if he doesn’t see us going anywhere?’


I was pondering all of this when a coffee cup appeared in my face. I looked up and saw my good friend, James, smiling down on me. “You looked like you needed something to cheer you up.” I smiled at him and took the coffee. It slid down my throat and warmed my entire body. He sat in the chair next to mine.
“What’s got you?” He asked. “You look like you’re chewing on something big.”
“Nothing much.” I responded. “Just thinking about some stuff.”
James looked at my laptop. “Oh, that kind of stuff.”
I smiled at him. “How do you know what this is about?”
“You and Brian always e-mail back and forth. Where is he, by the way? Shouldn’t he be here?”
“No.” I said. “He’s looking at a land site. He’s thinking about expanding.”
James nodded his head. I could tell he had a lot on his mind. I wanted to ask, but he gave me no opportunity. “Will you-ah-“He cleared his throat. “Would you like to go out for dinner tonight, say around 7?”
I was surprised. James and I have known each other since high school. In fact, he and Brian were pretty good friends. But he had never asked me out, ever. I was at a loss for words. “I-ah-well,” I finally stammered out. “I will have to ask Brian about it, but I’m pretty sure he’ll say yes.”
James nodded. This didn’t look like a shock to him. ‘He must not mean it in any weird sort of way then.’ I told myself. James and I talked for a little bit about how college was going and how his family was, and then awkwardly, he just stood up, said bye and left. I flipped open my laptop to e-mail Brain about tonight.
Hey Brian, I would love to go out tonight, but James Kinsaw just asked me if I wanted to go out to dinner tonight with him. I told him I would ask you. Please e-mail me back when you can. Love you, too. ~Lena
I pushed send and waited. Brian normally e-mailed me back pretty quickly. I had waited about 2 minutes when I got my reply.
Hey. Well…I guess I don’t care. I was really looking forward to tonight, but I don’t want to keep you from doing the things you want to do. Thanks for asking though. Hey, if you go out tonight, promise you’ll go out with me tomorrow night…I have something really special planned. Love you sweetie! ~Brian
I e-mailed him back and told him I was looking forward to it. Brian and I have not done ‘something special’ in a long time. Both of us have been focused on other things; me with school and him with work. It was hard at times because if we did want to hang out, one of us might have something going on, and vice versa. Sometimes it caused us to argue, but in the long run I think it has brought us closer together. I smiled as I thought about what Brian could be planning. He was a really romantic guy. He could come up with some of the sweetest ideas and say some lines that would make me cry. I was extremely thankful he was my boyfriend, just slightly confused at why we hadn’t talked about marriage. I didn’t want to make him feel pressured to do anything, but we hadn’t talked about it since sophomore year of college.
After work, I went home and tried to figure out what to wear. I didn’t know whether to wear something fancy or not. I decided that I would go in the middle and wear a red knee length skirt and a white top with cap sleeves. I looked at myself in the mirror. I felt like I needed to wear something that showed I was Brian’s girlfriend. I glanced through my jewelry and found a necklace and earrings that he had bought me for our two-year anniversary.
Just as he had said, James was at my house in his black Malibu. I watched him walk to my door through the window. He had on a black suit with a red tie. ‘Wow.’ I thought. ‘We would end up matching.’ It reminded me of prom, and how I searched for that one paint chip that matched my dress to give to Brian. I opened the door and James stepped in from the rain.
“Hello.” He smiled. “Are you ready? I left the car on so it would be warm. Let me go out ahead of you though. I have an umbrella.” He stepped out the door and put the umbrella over my head as I locked my door.
We talked small talk as we drove to the restaurant. He wouldn’t tell me where we were going and I was feeling just a little bit awkward. As we pulled up to the restaurant, I realized it was the most expensive one in town. I looked at James as he turned off the car.
“There is no way we can eat here. C’mon, let’s just go eat at McDonalds or something. This place is super expensive.”
James laughed. “It’s ok. I didn’t just happen to pull in here. I know it’s expensive.” He gave me a wink. “I’ve been saving up for a while.”
We walked into the restaurant and I immediately knew I was underdressed. James said I looked fine, but all the people that we passed had on dresses and had huge diamonds on their necks and ears. Our table was in a back corner of the restaurant near a window. It had one little candle that lit the table up, and a large bouquet of roses placed in the middle. As the waiter took our drink orders, I stared at the card. ‘Just wanted to show you how much you mean to me.’ I thought about this. ‘How much do I mean to him?’
When the waiter had left us to enjoy our desserts, James looked up at me. “Lena, I have known you since what, fifth grade?” He chuckled to himself. “We have gone through a lot together and we’ve seen each other through the good times and bad. We’ve enjoyed high school together and…” He pushed his chair out, pulled out a box and got on his knee. “…and I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” He smiled at me. “Will you marry me?”
I was shocked. So much had just happened in the last five minutes and I had had no time to process it. This proposal had come at me like a shot in the dark. I had never, not once, pictured James as more than a friend.
“James. I, ah,” I had no idea what to say. He had obviously put a lot of thought into this proposal. I didn’t want to say no immediately and have him hate me for the rest of my life, but I didn’t want to say nothing and lead him on. “You are a really good friend to me, but I have never thought of you in that way. I-“
James stopped me. “Hey, how about I give you a week to think about it, and then give me an answer.” I nodded my head and we went home. I decided to not tell Brian about it. I knew I would say no, but I didn’t know how to say it without hurting him. ‘But what if this is my one chance to get married?’ I thought. I decided not to think this way. Brian was my love right now, and he was the one I ultimately wanted to marry.
The day at work, Brian snuck up behind me and gave me a hug. “Are you ready for tonight? I’ll pick you up around seven. You look good in anything you wear, but the place I’m planning on is kind of nice, and I know you like to know what you should wear…so, I’ll be at your house around seven.” He kissed me on my shoulder. I smiled and knew he was who I wanted. He knew me better than anyone.
After work, I went to the store and tried to find a dress that I could wear tonight. I found the perfect one. It was a black knee length dress with red accents. I knew Brian would love it and I wanted him to know how much I loved him.
He picked me up at seven and we drove to the restaurant singing to all the songs on the radio. As we pulled into the restaurant parking lot, I realized we were eating at the same place that James had taken me, and to my disbelief, the same table. As we walked to our table, I looked down and noticed rose petals leading the way to our table. Brian had bought roses and lilies and had them placed all around our table. I looked at Brian. “Did you-?” He just smiled and nodded his head. The waiter came and poured us both wine.
“I ordered

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