My Fake World - Mani Gmelin (books for men to read .TXT) 📗

PROLOGUE: THIS IS MY AWESOME FAKE LIFE. IN A JOURNAL.

I was listening to music and managing my blog on my computer. I heard footsteps outside my door. My door knob was slowly opening. Now I was scared. Who was gonna walk into my room? “Brace yourself Meredith,” I muttered under my breath. I grabbed the best weapon I could find close by and got out of bed. I walked towards the door cautiously. The door creaked open about an inch, and I was about to hit somebody in the head with a dictionary if I had to. I held the dictionary above my head, ready. The door opened more, and more, and more! I could already see something that looked like a monster! The something that looked like a monster looked at me. I looked at… someone with messed up, scraggly hair and wrinkles? I was about six inches away from whacking the person in the head, but then I saw them clearly. “Mom?” I asked her. “What are you doing up at 3:20 in the morning?” she asked sternly as I put the dictionary down on my desk. “I uh, I’ve been up this whole time.” I answered, hoping she wouldn’t pick up the book and whack me in the head with it. “Why would you stay up this late?” she asked, sounding irritated. “I was listening to music and managing my blog.” I said truthfully. “Well, go to bed!” my mom shouted at me. “Ok! Jeez.” I responded, and got into bed. "Wait… but you said that I could always stay up as late as I wanted.” I told her before she walked out the door. “So? I’m not right now, am I?!” my mom replied pleasantly. Not. “Gosh. Why are you so mad? And how did you even know I was awake?” I asked her. “I have really good hearing, okay? I could hear your typing from my room. So, I came in here to tell you to go to bed. You got it missy?” She answered my question, annoyed. Then she left and I went to bed.
So that might not have been the coolest or most interesting intro to something you’ve ever read, but it works for me. This is my fake life, which is awesome, in a journal. You can read more now.



KICKING AND DODGING

Today my cousin Cameron came over at 1 am in the morning. We took a flashlight outside and found a 20 foot long dead snake with its guts hanging out. Not something I would have liked to see, when say, I had eaten just about 10 minutes before. My cousin’s an eleven year old boy, who look’s absolutely nothing like me. He has a darker complexion, since he is Filipino and Italian. He also has black hair and I have to say, I have no idea what color his eyes are. I’ve never really looked at them close enough to be able to describe them. I’m a fifteen year old girl who looks sickly pale. Okay, so maybe not sickly. I have brown hair, and I think I have greenish, gold eyes. I’m 5’6 (and a half!) and he is about 5’2. He had his soccer ball that he brought with him, and he kept punting it and asking me to estimate how high it went. So here’s the cool part: one of the times he punted it, it went like 100 feet up! I’m not joking! Oh! And I’m—sorry I paused there. I had to duck so that I wouldn’t have to have a messed up face for the rest of my life.
I’m in P.E. in school right now, which I hate, and I could’ve just got hit with a dodge ball. But instead, I dodged it. That’s a good thing, huh?
I make my friends laugh a lot. I don’t really know if its how naturally funny my face is, or if they just think the things I say that are meant to be funny, are. I criticize myself a lot, don’t I? Note to self: stop making yourself feel bad about yourself. Oh my god! Mark just took a ball and threw it a Mr. Cannon’s face! This ought to be good. Wow, I wasn’t expecting that! Mr. Cannon just went over and punched Mark! And suspended him! I go to a really violent school. I try to stay back and not get noticed AT ALL. The last thing I want is someone throwing a ball directly at my face. Oh, wait, that already happened. But getting hit in the face is what Mr. Cannon gets for being the most arrogant, mean, aggressive and ignorant teacher you could ever meet. Okay, now I have to go. Not like go to the bathroom or anything. Okay… so this is embarrassing. Okay, I actually do have to go to the bathroom, so bye.
“Meredith, come over here!”
No, no, no! Oh no. Now I definitely have to go. Go talk to the teacher who’s mad as a fat person trying to fit into a movie theater seat! That was a really weird metaphor.
Anyway, I’ll be back as soon as I can, wish me luck!
“Meredith! Come over here right now and say how good I am at throwing dodge balls!" “But I don’t want to! Why do I have to be the one to compliment you?!”
Why, why did I just say that? Wow, I’m still writing in this. Now I really have to GO.
“Meredith, I’m the teacher, so get your butt over here right now and compliment me if I want you to!” Mr. Cannon yelled at me, since I’m sitting in the very back of the gym. “Fine! I’m coming.” I yelled back.
Why does my life have to be so weird sometimes? Whatever. I’ll be back as soon as I can to write some more about what happened.
Okay, so that was an interesting thing that happened. Mr. Cannon made me compliment him, and then I had to go to the bathroom so much that I asked him if I could go. Like, go, go. He looked astonished at me, wondering, I guess, why I would ask him that question. Or as if, I had just asked him if he could loan me a half a million dollars so that I could start my own fast food chain. If I did get that opportunity in my life sometime, though, I would name the restaurants “Eat and Get Out.” People would probably just go to it because of how interesting the name is.

I love writing, but talking is also a great way to communicate and share your ideas and just general stuff with other people. That sentence was totally out of