Fantasy, Ecstasy, Reality - Kris Laurentz (best ereader for pdf .TXT) 📗

Fantasy, Ecstasy, Reality

Fantasy…

The lights are dim and they give the room a sensual glow.
I know he is in the room, but I dare not look.
For it will lessen the excitement and surprise of the unknown.

As I stand in the middle of my chamber wanting, craving, desiring, waiting… yes, waiting for the introduction, I focus on the sound of his slow, gentle, yet commanding breath emitting behind me.

It is getting closer, taunting me, teasing me, making me want him more.
I begin to turn around and the rhythm of his hypnotic seduction changes.

Without a word, he commands me to be silent and still.
He commands me to wait…to wait for his introduction.
I feel so open, willing, and desirable, yet so vulnerable, unsure, and exposed.

So many emotions are flooding my mind, body, and soul.
Passion, lust, desire, excitement, anticipation, love…
I feel a fire burning deep inside that needs to be put out, a thirst that only his touch can quench.
There’s an animal-like urge that I can’t control, I want to unleash the beast inside…but still I wait.

I start to tremble as I feel his warm breath on my neck and
the heat exuding from his body. It engulfs every ounce of my being and I am frozen. This fear has rendered me motionless. I am afraid to move, afraid to think; afraid that these feelings inside my core will dissipate like a dense fog that rolls out to sea, never to return again.
.
He ever so slightly brushes my hair away from my neck. I can feel every silky strand sensually falling silently away. This silky silence persuades me to bend to his will, to relax, to prepare myself for this erotic yet mysterious journey.

Finally…the introduction begins.

Ecstasy…

I feel something soft and silky slide up the front of my body; climbing slowly, outlining every curve. My heart is racing, my breathing intensifies, my body vacillating uncontrollably, the beast within is screaming…imploring to be released.

It finally stops… resting gently over my eyes.
I feel it tighten ever so slightly, blocking out all light. Anticipation is building, my chest begins to heave with every breath.

His soft yet firm hands slide slowly up my arms, gently positioning my arms above my head, allowing them to fold and rest on my crown. His hands retreat, retracing the outline of my arms with his inviting touch.

I can feel his masculine form touch me, but only just, along my back. He continues to outline my full and wanting figure with his hands slowly and tenderly, just as an artist gently and thoroughly caresses the clay as he forms it, molds it, commands it.

Without warning, his hands stop on my voluptuous hips, and then he carefully turns me around to face him, yet I still cannot see with my eyes.

I see in my minds’ eye the scene he is directing, taking his every prompt with ease. No words need to be said, we are of one mind…one heart…one soul. My thoughts are racing, unsure of where he will lead me from here.

I am falling in slow motion as a leaf falls from the highest branch. The mighty oak’s branches gently guide this

leaf to safety… the safety of the soft bed that is submissive yet strong enough to hold the mighty oak; to hold it in place during even the most violent of storms. He leans in and whispers, like the wind whispers to the trees…”Open your eyes and let go”.

The silky wrap loosens its grasp, slides down my cheek and I slowly open my eyes. Mounted above me, his eyes have so much passion and longing that they make me feel beautiful, sexy, wanted; telling me I’m the only woman he’s ever desired, that I am his fantasy…his dream.

I part my lips to speak, but I have no words…I need no words. Our minds are linked together acting as one; he knows exactly what I want to say and what I desire. I begin to close my eyes, but can’t. I want and need to see the passion rising up within him.

I need to see the connection between us…suddenly it is as if time was stopped for a brief moment.
He leans in and teasingly brushes his lips against mine, I begin to respire faster and more deeply…This fever I have has consumed me…I can’t wait.

I see the impatience and anticipation building in his eyes; I hear it in his every breath. I feel it in the way he slides his strong hand behind the arch of my back, slowly yet firmly lifting me into him. His touch is so sensual. The way he moves so rhythmically, puts me into an almost trance like state…we are finally melding completely into one body, one mind, one soul.

We are intertwined in such a gentle, smooth, and unrestrained fashion just like the colors of a flame. Wrapping, caressing, bonding themselves to and around the air; surrounding the soft and uninhibited form supporting the flame’s enticing rhythmic dance. He looks through me into the very depths of my soul. No-one has ever discovered or awakened this place hidden deep inside of me.

Small, perfectly round beads of iridescent and translucent pearls slowly fall from his face; connecting and dancing their way down my fully extended, moist, ivory skin. One last glance before pure, never experienced, raw, unadulterated, sheer ecstasy.

Finally, the emotional, physical, and spiritual connection I’ve been waiting for my whole life! I draped myself over him, laying in complete silence except for the beating of our hearts.

The beating of our hearts enmesh into one, while he lovingly strokes my hair…holding me…holding me as if it was the last time we would ever be together. He takes my face, gently turning it, gazing into my deep blue eyes. He leans in. His lips graze my ear as he whispers, “It is you, it has always been you. You are the one I dream about, you are the one I fantasize about. You are the only woman that can satisfy me in every way…the only woman I have and ever will love”.

A small tear erupts and rolls down my cheek onto my soft and supple lips. This is what I have been waiting for, what I have wanted, what I needed, what I have craved. The void I had in my heart has now been filled…I am complete and satisfied in ways I never dreamed was possible.

This is the true meaning of ecstasy…and I want it to last forever.

Reality…

I open my eyes and realize that the emotional and physical connection we once possessed has long passed.

The feeling of confidence as a wife, a woman, and a beautiful lover has faded; just as the color of the most breathtaking sunset fades into the night and never returns.

Once upon a time, desire, lust, passion, longing and excitement filled the very essence of my being. All that is left is feelings of physical and emotional inadequacy and loneliness. I miss the way he used to look at me. The fire in his eyes that once burned for me has gone. The passion in his kiss, in his touch, has faded to a mere memory.

I am no longer the sexy, beautiful, and desirable woman I once was. Now I am just a plain woman; a woman of undesired and unappreciated necessity.

I try to get his attention, doing all I can to just get a simple compliment…nothing.

I feel as if I could disappear and all that would be missed is…nothing.

To him I have become…nothing.


I am older, less appealing, and less beautiful as a woman inside and out. I have become ‘less than’. Day to day routines have set in… just going through the motions, two beings merely existing. Two beings just existing in the same place and breathing the same air…nothing more and nothing less.

I look at him and wonder what I did wrong…nothing that I do makes him want or desire me. The excitement he once felt for me has faded…I used to be his fantasy, his dream, his everything. I used to elevate him to a higher plane of existence…take him to the place of sheer and ultimate ecstasy.

I no longer feel I am beautiful, desirable, or sexy enough for someone like him. I feel like he deserves better. He deserves someone that can satisfy him in ways that I obviously can not…at least not anymore.

Tears quietly fill up in my saddened and faded blue eyes and my heart cries out into the night. I am slowly and painfully dying deep inside. All I want…all I need is the love and passion we once shared; the fire that used to burn deep inside to return.

I miss the little things…the quiver inside my soul when he brushes against me. The smiles that let me know how much he loves and desires me, me sitting on his lap with his strong arms… his strong arms wrapped around me, comforting me, letting me know I am still the one…
letting me know I am the only one he has and ever will love, and that only I can fulfill his every desire.

I want to feel the kind of excitement again that makes my heart skip a beat when we’re alone. I want for him to connect with me on every level of intimacy…for us to become one again. I want to feel like I am the most important thing in his life, the one that makes him complete.

Maybe I am asking for too much, like asking a simple daisy to become a beautiful bouquet of roses.

Maybe I should just be content with what is and not what was or what will never be.

Maybe this is how it is supposed to be, maybe this is all I deserve or am allowed.

Just like a sapling, the new growth is exciting and desires every ounce of life it is given. Then when it is fully grown, that is all there is and all there will ever be…

It is firm, strong, and accepts its fate…

It accepts its reality…to just exist.

This is my

reality.