shouting in silence - Wendy Ortiz (some good books to read .txt) š
- Author: Wendy Ortiz
Book online Ā«shouting in silence - Wendy Ortiz (some good books to read .txt) šĀ». Author Wendy Ortiz
I was born in New York, Iām not sure where exactly. See I wasnāt raised there all I know is that there was where my mother popped. At least thatās what my grandmother told me. You see my mother passed away when I was born so I didnāt get to know her. I was raised, part of my young life, by my father. But then was taken away and handed to my grandmother.
My mother named me Laura and well she gave me no middle name, it was just Laura Trinidad Rivera. When i came out my mother had a heart attack, I'm not sure why but that is what I was told. My father became depressed after my motherās death he couldnāt stand looking at anything that reminded him of her. So we moved, I was only 3 months or so. We moved to another state, we moved to Arkansas.
There my father and I moved to an apartment which is where I lived for most of my young life. It was a perfect place our neighbors where nice and the weather was perfect. Father seemed to love where we were. He found a great job and he also found a girlfriend, after three years of being single. Her name was Tina, she loved me and I loved her. Every day before school she would wake me up with some blueberry pancakes, bacon and some nice homemade orange juice. She would dress me and take me to school. She did this for about five years, then she left. I guess this is what sparked the fire because before that father was very happy.
That Saturday morning father woke up to an empty bed. There was a note on the pillow that read:
Iām sorry, but I had to go, I love you and you know this but
I couldnāt stay I have to find my real destiny. Take care
With much love,
Tina
P.S. give a kiss to Laura and tell her I love her. Good bye
I hadnāt seen my dad cry since a long time but that day it wasnāt only tears I saw, I saw more. That night was when my destiny started.
Father didnāt stop drinking it was around 8 when it happened I knew the time because that when I always started to get sleepy and Tina would tuck me in. I went to father and asked him to tuck me in. ātuck you in? What do I look like? Iām not doing anything for you, go away!ā He was drunk and so I ignored him and with tears in my eyes I said good night and went to my bed. Later that night I was awaken by a slap on my face. I woke up frighten I wasnāt sure what was going on. āYou stupid child itās your entire fault, she died because of you and Tina left because of you now Iām all aloneā he yelled as if he was crazy. I started crying not knowing why all this was my fault. āWhy didnāt you die you should have been the one dead buried under the groundā he slapped my face on more time and pulled me off my bed and threw me on the hard floor. āIām sorry daddy!ā I said still crying and shakingā SORRY!! You think you can solve it this with one simple Iām sorry? Whatta hell is your head? Shit!?!ā he said this as he shook me violently. He got up and said āI wish you would die that would solve my problemsā as he was about to walk out he turned around and kicked me on my stomach.
The next morning I expected him to apologize, hug me and everything would go back to normal. I was wrong, nothing was normal any more he was always drunk or high and I would spend most of my time hiding in my closet. I had to learn how to cook how to wash I had to grow up if I wanted to live. He didnāt do anything for me and if I didnāt cook right I would receive an extra beating.
I was only eight and I had to do all that a teenager would be doing, I lived a womanās life not a childās life. Father beat me almost every night for the same reason. If he didnāt do it, it was because he was to drunk or because I hid in the closet and he couldnāt find me. Fear replaced the love that I had for him. Every night I would look up and ask to myself why was my life like this? Why didnāt someone come to my rescue? I didnāt have any friends, in school I stayed by myself and pushed everyone away. One day in fourth grade I punched a boy in the throat because he said I looked like crap. That night I received a beating because I was a bad girl. Father was always smart to where to hit me so the school or anyone else wouldnāt notice. I wish someone would notice, I wished I could be saved.
One day at the beginning of my fifth grade year a blond cute little girl came to me. She had a nice cute pink skirt with a white blouse on. I hated the way she looked, I was jealous I was still wearing the same clothes from two years ago and I looked so ugly. āHi!ā she said in a peppy voice. I already hating her she was too happy to clean. āWhat?!?!ā I responded with nasty attitude. āI was wondering if I could sit with you.ā I never shared my desk but I made an option āThank youā EWW! I felt disgusted by her happiness. How can someone be so happy? āBy the way my name is Lauraā she held her hand out and smiled. Not only did she look better than me but she also had my name. What was this world turning into? āHiā I shook her hand and snatched it real quick āwhatās your name?ā did it really matter if she knew? āLauraā. She seemed exited when I said this cause she squeaked I mean for real this crazy blond chick squeaked and almost made a hole in the roof from how high she jumped. āwe are going to be great friends!!ā
chapter 2: My SaviourThat last year was great; as Laura had said we did become great friends in fact she was my best friend, my sister. She and I went to the same middle school and stayed together we did everything together stood by each other and for each other. My life didnāt feel that bad now that I had her, she helped me forget the pain and agony from home. Laura had no idea what I went through at home all she knew was that my father didnāt make enough money so he was out a lot trying to make ends meet.
We were in the last week of our eighth grade year and we were excited because we were going to be going to high school. We were going to be teens and were going to be able to have fun, real fun. Lauraās parents were strict about how she should behave and what she should do but since her parents were always in business trips she did what she wanted. It was fun being around her, she looked so innocent yet she was so wild. āSo what are you going to wear for the graduation party?ā she asked with such enthusiasm. She had been planning a party since the beginning of our eight grade year. āI donāt know, some jeans and a shirt I guessā I didnāt want to say anything but my father, he wouldnāt give me money for anything of that and my babysitting wasnāt going to be able to pay everything off. āWHAT!!! Laura you need to look sexy! Hello high scholars are going to be there and we need to look good not like two little girlsā I knew what she was thinking she wanted a night with one of them. āI really donāt want any attention from them I just want to graduate keep on moving and start my lifeā and get away from my father āsee thatās whatās so different about us I want to ride the roller coaster and you would be content if you just rode the lazy riverā she did a lot of comparing, she always compered everything with anythingā whatever letās get to class before we are lateā.
When school was over Laura dropped me off at my houseā ok so be ready by eight tonightā what was she talking about? I got chills all over my body she had that smiled on her face that told me she was planning something āwhy?ā I asked kind of wishing she wouldnāt respond āoh youāll seeā as she said this her car went by. I opened the door of my house and as I stepped in I got creped out. It was to quiet. I ignored my feeling and stated walking toward my room as I passed my fatherās room I heard moans and smacks, I knew he had one of his little friend over again. It discussed me how every day he slept with a whole different girl. I mean for real, Iāve seen them all and none of them are repeated. As a stepped out of my room to go the kitchen a sound caught my attention. My father moan and started saying yes, and another manly voice said give it to me give it to me. I froze; my father was sleeping with another man? I felt dizzy I needed air I needed to vomit I ran to my bathroom and pucked my guts out. As I stepped out once more my father was coming out as well and behind him followed a tall tan green eyed man. He was gorgeous.
āWhat are you looking at?ā he shouted at me. I wasnāt sure what to do I just stood there and stared at him. The guy looked at me and said āhi sweetieā sweetie? What!!! I was more than disgusted I didnāt know what to do so all I did was walk away and walked towards the kitchen. He pulled me by the hair and said ādonāt be rude, he said hiā he turned me around and made me face him. āHiā as I said this turned around and started to walk away. I stepped in the kitchen I heard dad say, Iām sorry she is a very misbehaving girl, I try my best to raise her correctly but she just doesnāt listen. A misbehaving girl? Sure, I did everything in this house I donāt know what he was talking about
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