Till The End - By: zzmbrashear (lightweight ebook reader .TXT) 📗

left was important right now but I couldn’t keep it from her. “He was on his way home from my house when he was killed.”
She looked at me with those big brown eyes with tears in them and said, “What?”
“He came to tell me he loved me but I pushed him away and told him I could never do that to you. I told him no and made him go home. I thought he would go home.
Where they found his body was nowhere close to his house. I don’t know what he was doing there.” I said but she paused and didn’t say anything until about 10 minuets later.
“If you told him yes, would he have stayed?” She asked.
“Yes.” I replied.
“Why didn’t you say yes. I would rather him be alive and with you than not alive and be with me. Why Alexis, Why?” She started screaming then sat down. “I apologize but everything always leaves. Nothing stays. Not my Mother, my dog, Matt, even Brittany stopped talking to me.”
“But you still have me.” I said and she smiled and then told me that that is the best thing of all. We walked on that beach till morning and she told me everything that was on her mind.

CHAPTER 7

The next day I spent the night at her house and when we woke up to get the mail her yard was full of reporters.
“Was it hard to lose your boyfriend and baby? How do you do it? What is going through your mind? How do you feel?” They were all screaming at the same time and finally Lindsey went back inside.
“How am I suppose to go to school? I am not doing it, I feel like shit and what is going through my mind is they need to get the hell off my lawn!” She said and then broke down. “I cant do this. Its just too much. “ I went out side after she said that and told those reporters what was on ‘my’ mind.
“You can take those fancy cameras and shove them up you god living hairy a**! And take those microphones and shove them up it with them and take your vans our of my drive way before I have them ‘and’ towed. Yeah I said so get moving!” I screamed. I could hear them cuss me out below their breath but I was happy because they needed to get their noses out of other peoples business.
“I saw that. Thank you.” Lindsey said.
“ About time they left. They were scraping up my grass.” Her father said and then I chuckled. Lindsey and I went up stairs to relax because yelling at reporters at five a.m doesn’t exactly lower your blood pressure. When we went up stairs I let her dye my hair to get her mind off of things. She dyed it black because I have a good hair cut for that color. Then she painted my nails, combed my hair, and gave me a manicure. We talked about what really mattered that day. The next day when I woke up Lindsey was not there. I looked all over and even asked her mom.
“Mrs. Post, do you know were Lindsey is?” I asked wiping my eyes and getting some breakfast.
“Yes, she went out about four a clock this morning.” She said handing me a plate. I took it, ate and then went to the one place were she always goes.
When I got there she was standing and staring at the rising sun.
“This is when I told him I was pregnant. He was so happy. He hugged me and then we went swimming. Lexi, What am I going to do? I loved him.” She corrected her self. “I love him.”
“Its just something you have to get through, ya know?” I said but she hung her head, wiped her eyes and stood up.
“I’m going to take a walk.” She said while brushing off her butt were sand had clung to.
“Would you like me to come with you?” I asked.
“No, I would like to be alone to think about things.” She said. I nodded and stayed were I was.


CHAPTER 8

LINDSEY’S POINT OF VIEW

As I was walking down that beach I remember when I first realized I liked Matthew. It feels like just yesterday but its actually been a little over a year. Since Alexis was out of school, Matt needed someone to be his partner in Science so I told him I would. His house was too noisy with his baby sister so we went to the beach instead because its peaceful and quite. When we got here we started studying but he kept staring at me until I said something.
“Can we get back to work. Why are you staring at me?” I asked but he didn’t say anything. Then our eyes locked and we stared at each other for what seemed like forever. Then he leaned in and I leaned in and we kissed. It was so beautiful in with the sunset and the orange water and the sand but then I pulled away from the only kiss that gave me fireworks and thought of Alexis.
“Oh my god.” I said.
“I’m sorry. So sorry, really.” He said.
“No theirs nothing to be sorry about.” I said back to him but then we kissed again but this time longer and then that was the night I lose my virginity. It wasn’t what everybody says it would be. It wasn’t fun either. Maybe the first time isn’t suppose to be fun. I don’t know but although it wasn’t fun, it was amazing. When his body touched mine I got goosebumps and it was that event that made me love Matthew more than I could ever love somebody. To be that intimate and close to someone was the most amazing thing I have ever felt but the sex its self was not what ever one, including adults, says it would be. That night, on that beach, below that sunset something incredible happened. We made a baby but it died with my true love.
As I walked on the beach and thought of everything Matthew and I did I started to cry. Then I fell to my knees. Lindsey must have been watching because she ran after me screaming “Alexis! Alexis! Are you okay?” I stayed on the ground crying my eyes out.
“I miss him so much.” I said still weeping.
“I know. I miss him too.” She said while rubbing my shoulders trying to make me feel loved but then it hit me. I totally forgot about who I stole him from. About what she will be feeling. How would I feel if my best friend stole my boyfriend, got pregnant from him, and then they including the baby died. She must be more upset than I am.
“I’m so sorry. Its my fault he is dead! All my fault.” And although it was true it made me cry even more because it is I who made Alexis feel like Matthew was dead because I can no longer hold him or kiss him. I felt so terrible.

CHAPTER 9

ALEXIS’ POINT OF VIEW

I have no idea why Lindsey would think it was her fault but I didn’t want to upset her by asking. I stayed at my house that night. When I sat at my mirror after I got out of the shower I saw the pictures of Matthew, Lindsey and me. One was of us all laying on the floor and Matt has his hand around me and I have my hand around Linds.Another was of us in the car on the way back from the circus. He was sleeping on my shoulder. The last one was of Matthew. He had his basketball jersey on and he was giving me a kiss. I miss him so much. When I laid on my I stared at the left side because the last time he was here he laid with me on that side because I was sick and couldn’t fall asleep. He left after I went asleep but he wouldn’t leave until I was asleep. He came back in the morning before school and gave me something to eat. I was so in love with him. I don’t understand why? How? How can you have someone kissing you and then the next day he is gone. Why would someone do that to you?
“You have homework for the weekend and don’t forget to study for Tuesdays test.” Mr. Carroll said while writing it on the board. “Alexis please some and see me after class.” After the bell rang I stayed to see what he wanted. “Yes, Alexis. I would like to ask you if you could get Lindsey to come and see the guidance councilor after school ever Thursday and Tuesday.”
“Why?” I asked trying not to be rude.
“She has not handed in homework in any of her subjects since Matt passed.” He replied.
“That doesn’t make sense I help her with her homework everyday after school. She finishes it and puts it in her binder to take to school.” And then I looked to her desk to see that she left her binder on her seat. I walked over to it picked it up and took it to the teacher. When he opened it up he saw assignments from every subject.
“She did her work.” He said.
I finished his sentence. “But never turned it in.” We both exchanged the same look. The next day we both talked to her.
“Lindsey, why haven’t you turned in your homework?” I continued. “You will be in the same grade again if you don’t.”
“I don’t have to okay!” She said and then when she picked up her books I saw something. Something on her arm.
“Lindsey Lauren Post! When!?!” I screamed while violently taking her arm.
“Just leave me alone.” She said pulling it away from me. She knew I was a Christian and that I don’t believe in ruining my body by cutting my self.
“When did you start!?!” I said while slightly lowering my voice.
“A few days after he died. It releases my stress and pain.” She was going to say something else but I cut her off.
“And the price you have to pay is having these, these, scares and the disgusting marks it leaves! You should be ashamed!” I said while storming out of the room.
“You do know I have to report this to the schools therapist.” Mr.Carroll said. Lindsey nodded and walked out of the room. I hated people who cut and dress like thugs and she knew that. She knew that I thought of my body as pure and now hers is not anymore. That will be permeant and how will it look if she gets older and has to go to a interview or something. I just can’t believe she would do this. I am speechless. The next day in school I saw two kids making out in the hallway. The girl had black hair and the boy did too. She also had skinny jeans, a tight black shirt, black make-up, converse, and a black belt. She had a lip ring, nose ring and a tattoo on her left arm. I though she must have been a new kid but when I looked at her face it was Lindsey.
“Lindsey what are you doing?” I said pulling the thug away from her and giving him the most mean look.
“Hey lady chill it. Me and Chuck was just getting started.” She said popping her gum.
“What has gotten into you? If your mother and father saw you like this they would have a heart attack.” I said taking