The Lust of Hate - Guy Newell Boothby (english love story books txt) 📗
- Author: Guy Newell Boothby
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came out. The mere sight of the man I hated shattered all my plans in an
instant. In the presence of the extraordinary individual accompanying
him I had not sufficient pluck to cry “engaged”; so, when the
commissionaire hailed me, there was nothing for it but to drive across
the road and pull up alongside the pavement, as we had previously
arranged.
“You’re in luck’s way, Bartrand,” cried Nikola, glancing at my
horse, which was tossing his head and pawing the ground as if eager
to be off again; “that’s a rare good nag of yours, cabby. He’s worth
an extra fare.”
I grunted something in reply, I cannot remember what. The mere
sight of Bartrand standing there on the pavement scanning the horse,
had roused all my old antipathy; and, as I have said, my good
resolves were cast to the winds like so much chaff.
“Well, for the present, au revoir, my dear fellow,” said
Nikola, shaking hands with his victim. “I will meet you at the house
in half-an-hour, and if you care about it you can have your revenge
then; now you had better be going. Twenty-eight, Saxeburgh Street,
cabby, and don’t be long about it.”
I touched my hat and opened the apron for Bartrand to step inside.
When he had done so he ordered me to lower the glass, and not be long
in getting him to his destination or I’d hear of it at the other end.
He little thought how literally I might interpret the command.
Leaving Nikola standing on the pavement looking after us, I shook
up my horse and drove rapidly down the street. My whole body was
tingling with exultation; but that it would have attracted attention
and spoiled my revenge, I felt I could have shouted my joy aloud.
Here I was with my enemy in my power; by lifting the shutter in the
roof of the cab I could see him lolling inside—thinking, doubtless,
of his wealth, and little dreaming how close he was to the poor
fellow he had wronged so cruelly. The knowledge that by simply
pressing the spring under my hand I could destroy him in five
seconds, and then choosing a quiet street could tip him out and be
done with him for ever, intoxicated me like the finest wine. No one
would suspect, and Nikola, for his own sake, would never betray me.
While I was thinking in this fashion, and gloating over what I was
about to do, I allowed my horse to dawdle a little. Instantly an
umbrella was thrust up through the shutter and I was ordered, in the
devil’s name, to drive faster.
“Ah! my fine fellow,” I said to myself, “you little know how near
you are to the master by whom you swear. Wait a few moments until
I’ve had a little more pleasure out of your company, and then we’ll
see what I can do for you.”
On reaching Piccadilly I turned west, and for some distance
followed the proper route for Saxeburgh Street. All the time I was
thinking, thinking, and thinking of what I was about to do. He was at
my mercy; any instant I could make him a dead man, and the cream of
the jest was that he did not know it. My fingers played with the
fatal knob, and once I almost pressed it. The touch of the cold steel
sent a thrill through me, and at the same instant one of the most
extraordinary events of my life occurred. I am almost chary of
relating it, lest my readers may feel inclined to believe that I am
endeavouring to gull them with the impossible. But, even at the risk
of that happening, I must tell my story as it occurred to me. As I
put my hand for the last time upon the knob there rose before my
eyes, out of the half dark, a woman’s face, and looked at me. At
first I could scarcely believe my own eyes. I rubbed them and looked
again. It was still there, apparently hanging in mid-air above the
horse I was driving. It was not, if one may judge by the photographs
of famous beauties, a perfect face, but there was that in it that
made it to me the most captivating I had ever seen in my life—I
refer to the expression of gentleness and womanly goodness that
animated it. The contour of the face was oval, the mouth small and
well-shaped, and the eyes large, true, and unflinching. Though it
only appeared before me for a few seconds, I had time to take
thorough stock of it, and to remember every feature. It seemed to be
looking straight at me, and the mouth to be saying as plainly as any
words could speak—“Think of what you are doing, Gilbert
Pennethorne; remember the shame of it, and be true to yourself.” Then
she faded away; and, as she went, a veil that had been covering my
eyes for months seemed now to drop from them, and I saw myself for
what I really was—a coward and a would-be murderer.
We were then passing down a side street, in which—fortunately
for what I was about to do—there was not a single person of any sort
to be seen. Happen what might, I would now stop the cab and tell the
man inside who I was and with what purpose I had picked him up. Then
he should go free, and in letting him understand that I had spared
his life I would have ray revenge. With this intention I pulled my
horse up, and, unwrapping my rug from my knees, descended from my
perch. I had drawn up the glass before dismounting, the better to be
able to talk to him.
“Mr. Bartrand,” I said, when I had reached the pavement, at the
same time pulling off my false beard and my sou’wester, “this
business has gone far enough, and I am now going to tell you who I am
and what I wanted with you. Do you know me?”
Either he was asleep or he was too surprised at seeing me before
him to speak, at any rate he offered no reply to my question.
“Mr. Bartrand,” I began again, “I ask you if you are aware who I
am?”
Still no answer was vouchsafed to me, and immediately an overwhelming
fear took possession of me. I sprang upon the step and tore open the
apron. What I saw inside made me recoil with terror. In the corner, his
head thrown back and his whole body rigid, lay the unfortunate man I had
first determined to kill, but had since decided to spare. I ran my
hands, all trembling with terror, over his body. The man was dead—and I
had killed him. By some mischance I must have pressed the spring which
opened the valve, and thus the awful result had been achieved. Though
years have elapsed since it happened, I can feel the agony of that
moment as plainly now as if it was but yesterday.
When I understood that the man was really dead, and that I was his
murderer—branded henceforth with the mark of Cain—I sat down on the
pavement in a cold sweat of terror, trembling in every limb. The face
of the whole world had changed within the past few minutes—now I
knew I could never be like other men again. Already the fatal noose
was tightening round my neck.
While these thoughts were racing through my brain, my ears, now
preternaturally sharp, had detected the ring of a footstep on the
pavement a hundred yards or so away. Instantly I sprang to my feet,
my mind alert and nimble, my whole body instinct with the thought of
self-preservation. Whatever happened I must not be caught,
red-handed, with the body of the murdered man in my possession. At
any risk I must rid myself of that, and speedily, too.
Climbing to my perch again I started my horse off at a rapid pace
in the same direction in which I had been proceeding when I had made
my awful discovery. On reaching the first cross-roads I branched off
to the right, and, discovering that to be a busy thoroughfare, turned
to the left again. Never before had my fellow-man inspired me with
such terror. At last I found a deserted street, and was in the act of
pressing the lever with my foot when a door in a house just ahead of
me opened, and a party of ladies and gentlemen issued from it. Some
went in one direction, others in a contrary, and I was between both.
To drop the body where they could see it would be worse than madness,
so, almost cursing them for interrupting me, I lashed my horse and
darted round the first available corner. Once more I found a quiet
place, but this time I was interrupted by a cab turning into the
street and coming along behind me. The third time, however, was more
successful. I looked carefully about me. The street was empty in
front and behind. On either side were rows of respectable
middle-class houses, with never a light in a window or a policeman to
be seen.
Trembling like a leaf, I stopped the cab, and when I had made sure
that there was no one looking, placed my foot upon the lever. So
perfect was the mechanism that it acted instantly, and, what was
better still, without noise. Next moment Bartrand was lying upon his
back in the centre of the road. As soon as his weight released it the
bottom of the vehicle rose, and I heard the spring click as it took
its place again. Before I drove on I turned and looked at him where
he lay so still and cold on the pure white snow, and thought of the
day at Markapurlie, when he had turned me off the station for wanting
to doctor poor Ben Garman, and also of the morning when I had
denounced him to the miners on the Boolga Bange, after I had
discovered that he had stolen my secret and appropriated my wealth.
How little either of us thought then what the end of our hatred was
to be! If I had been told on the first day we had met that I should
murder him, and that he would ultimately be found lying dead in the
centre of a London street, I very much doubt if either of us would
have believed it possible. But how horribly true it was!
As to what I was now, there could be no question. The ghastly
verdict was self-evident, and the word rang in my brain with a
significance I had never imagined it to possess before. It seemed to
be written upon the houses, to be printed upon the snow-curdled sky.
Even the roll of the wheels beneath me proclaimed me a murderer.
Until that time I had had no real conception of what that grisly word
meant. Now I knew it for the most awful in the whole range of our
English language.
All this time I had been driving aimlessly on and on, having no
care where I went, conscious only that I must put as great a
distance as possible between myself and the damning evidence of my
crime. Then a reaction set in, and I became aware that to continue
driving in this half-coherent fashion was neither politic nor
sensible, so I pulled myself together and tried to think what I had
better do. The question for my consideration was whether I should
hasten to Hogarth Square as arranged and hand the cab over to Nikola,
or whether I should endeavour to dispose of it in some other way, and
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