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honey, you must’ve been bored staying home.”

“What? No. I was not alone, Kate! Serena has been here, and above all, Jules is always with me. How do you say I’ve been alone?” my voice becomes a bit shrill.

“O God! please, don’t take it otherwise, Eve. I didn’t mean anything bad, seriously. You know, I just wanted to...” she starts mumbling.

“It’s okay, Kate. Quit trying to explain things, I think you’re right. I do need a little walk outside, maybe.” I clench my jaw. “Can you please be by her side for five minutes?”

“Gosh! Eve, course I can, I can be here the rest of the night. You just go ahead have a walk if you want to.” Her motherly concern jerks something inside of my heart.

“Thanks, Kate. Thanks for being with us at this moment. You do remind me of mom every time.” I reach out to squeeze her hand.

“Mom! Why can’t I grow mustache like dad?” I held out two grass-leaves onto my lips to fake having mustache.

“Cos Missy, you are a girl and girls can’t grow mustache like guys do.” Mom told me laughing at my weird question.

“No, no! look at her honey, she already grew super heroic, green mustaches! Can’t you see? My baby girl is extra ordinary.” Dad gave off his ever-bright laughter.

“Come on, Eve! Why do you always want to have everything dad has? You cannot be like dad.” Julia teased me.

“No... I want to be like dad. Mom! Why is she saying I can’t...? my whining got submerged under a huge wave of laughter.

I let out a big sigh. The same place, the same grass, the same sky and the same me. Only those three cheerful, amazing people are no more like before. A drop of tear slips across my cheek. I keep looking at the backyard silently sitting on a bench.

They say we cannot relive the past, but why the past is always there to haunt us down? Why do they say live in the moment when the present is a burning hell for me? Silent rolling of tears quickly turns into sobbing. I struggle to halt scream from coming out of my mouth. I seriously feel like crying my heart out.

“Everything is falling apart” I murmured.

“EVERYTHING.IS.FALLING. APART” I suddenly shout out loud.

“Not if you can put yourself together. World can break down into pieces but you can choose not to collapse.” That knee-weakening voice floats in from behind.

I don’t become startled, instead I become really embarrassed to cry in front of an outsider. So, I remain put on the bench without turning back.

“Are you doing okay, Miss Lawrence?” a firm hand touches my shoulder.

I try not to look at him, “Yeah! Sure, I’m totally alright.”

“Your voice doesn’t quite say the same thing, I’m afraid.”

“I-I think I got to get going, Mr. Miller. Um, Jules must be hungry.” I grin a little and get up on my heels.

“Miss Lawrence, I’m so sorry for what you are going through right now, but I must say, your swollen eyes don’t quite go with you.” He looks calmly at my face while sticking the hands in his trouser pockets.

“Well, thanks for your concern, really! Means a lot.” I cannot help more tears rolling down my cheeks. I look away abruptly trying in vain to hide it from the guy, who doesn’t show any sign to leave. Not quite yet. So, I turn quickly to pace toward the house.

“If you are feeling broken because of your parents’ death and your sister’s condition right now, I won’t blame you for that. But, Miss Lawrence, in case it’ll help you a little, I lost all of my family members at once, and worse, I’ve been blamed for their death. And look at me, I have not let the world around break me.” Does his voice just shake a bit?

My eyes expand at his words, my body jerks a little, slowly sending a chill down my spine.

“Go, get some sleep, Miss Lawrence. I genuinely hope you’ll feel better very soon.” He gives me a warm smile that touches my core. I never saw such a smile on his face. I’m very overwhelmed at what just happened that I completely forgot to reflect on how sacrilegiously gorgeous he looked with that smile. I nod a little at him being unable to look away even after he’s long gone. 

O boy! He does have hell loads of mysteries hidden behind that collected and handsome face. Do I want to dig any deeper? Do I NEED to know any further than what he wants everyone else to know about? Maybe he wants me to know a bit more or why would he give off bits and pieces of his mysteries every once in a while?

After being assured of Julia’s being in sound sleep, I head down to my room after a long week of staying beside Jules at her bed. A single week certainly made an unease and little discomfort in my favorite space, which is weird cos I haven’t felt any different after getting home after almost 3 months during that horrible accident. Taking a deep breath, I push open the window when a wave of cold, pleasant air whooshes against my face. I stare up to find the window closed in front of me.

Maybe he’s already enjoying his 5th dream where he’s onto killing someone choking or whatever the hell ways his head is filled with. Nah! I really need to stop altogether aching my head over him. He is probably dating my Aunt, so he’s more like my uncle now, not someone I’d think about before sleep. I let out a little laughter at my weird thoughts at this hour. My phone starts ringing before letting me detour to another crazy path inside my mind.

“Anna? What’s up? Aren’t you supposed to be sleeping by now?” I blurt out.

“Yeah, I know I must be sleeping right now but guess what happened.” Her voice sounds a little tensed up.

“You okay? Anna, did anyone break in? O my God! are you guys held hostage now? should I call 911?” my voice becomes so shrill that it starts bothering my own eardrums.

“Relaaaaax, you crazy! It’s just, I’m doing it again.” She swallows.

“Doing what? You’re not at a stranger’s house after getting drunk as hell, are you?”

“EVELYN! I did that only once for God’s sake.” I can sense she’s rolling her eyes even over the phone.

“Well, I’m sorry, now tell me what is it you’re doing again?”

“I’m sleepwalking again, Eve. I almost got myself killed yesterday and I’m freaking out to think about sleeping now.” her voice grows heavy with fear and anticipation.

“O my! Anna! What are you saying! Did you tell your mom and dad? Did they see it and rescue you? What exactly did you do to murder yourself? Jesus!” I gasp.

“No, Eve, nobody knows. I mean, I haven’t told anybody yet cos I’m afraid they’ll start locking me down in my room and remove everything from here except for only a mattress. I can’t let that happen to me AGAIN.” Her voice trails off.

“But...but Anna! You need to tell them for your own sake. Do not wait until some serious incident takes place. God! you okay now? I mean, you aren’t hurt, are you?” cold sweat rolls down my temple.

“No... A-yes, I mean I’m just a little hurt. I figured I sleepwalked to the kitchen and tried to slice off my wrist, but thankfully, Alvin was there on his walker and screamed loudly enough to wake me up.”

“Holy Moly! It’s being that same, old suicidal again this time. Please, Anny! Tell your parents, please, do not let it go any further. I’m telling you; I CANNOT AFFORD TO LOSE ANYONE ANYMORE. Am I clear to you?” I start shaking head to toe.

“Ye-yeah, I will. I mean, let’s wait till tomorrow, maybe it just happened because of the 4 extra glasses of wine I downed at the bar...”

“What? You did what? Come on, Anna! You cannot forget what doctor warned you about excessive alcohol intake.” I cut her off.

“I do remember that, but ugh! I was so frustrated. I couldn’t help taking some extra.” She growls. “Anyway, I’ll be okay, no worries! My wrist is Band-Aided perfectly to cover up the cut from mom’s eagle eye! Hopefully. How’s Julia? Is she doing ok?” she changes the topic.

“I don’t know, she’s doing, um she’s just getting by, actually.” I stop before inviting the tears out.

“I’m so sorry, Eve! I genuinely hope she’ll be okay, and you remain strong, ha? You can get through this shit. I know you will, sweetie.”

“Hope so too! But I’m warning you, seriously, do not hide that sleepwalking thing from your parents if something is up tonight.” I scoff.

“Aye, Aye Ma’am! Go get some sleep and keep your ears awake in case I call again.” She chuckles.

“Yeah, right!” I roll my eyes. “Good night, Muppet! Sleep tight, don’t let the sleepwalking bite.”

“O wow! Good night, Crackpot! Try to sleep rather than gawking at the Alchemist.” She laughs.

“O shut it, bitch! Bye.” I hang up the phone. Smiling at the screen I recheck the window of Ted’s room. O wow! It’s open. Did he open it while I was talking on the phone? God! was he keeping an eye on my movement the whole time? Shoot! I need to go back to Jules’ room. This guy is kinda freaking me out at this point. Or, maybe he just opened it to let some fresh air in. why it always has to be about me? Pfft! I’m such a freaking overthinker.

Chapter Eight

 

 “Serena, can you make your DELICIOUS Chicken Perm for dinner, tonight?” Kate’s voice floats across the hall. I stop midway feeding Julia. Something must be up with her demand. Is she asking Ted over for dinner? That’d be total disaster to tolerate their romance silently. I continue feeding Jules her favorite oatmeal soup.

“Sure! I’ll be glad to.” Serena’s ever-cheerful voice replies.

“Cool! One of my friends is coming over tonight and he’s obsessed with Chicken Perm. So, I was thinking about surprising him with the one of its kind.” She beams.

For some reason, I fail to keep myself from poking my nose into the topic.

“Who’s coming for dinner, Kate?” I try to sound excited.

“Oh! You know, that friend of mine, he insisted on checking on Jules. So, I just couldn’t say no.” she wrings her hands.

O wow! It cannot be anyone but Ted. Say it out, Kate! why don’t you just blurt out the name?

“Who? Mr. Miller?” Oops! That’s not what I intended to do. Shit.

“What? No! not him. I mean, he’s not my friend yet. Pfft! Just an acquaintance and neighbor. He seems really nice but again, a little uptight.” She shrugs.

“Yeah, that’s what he is... uptight.” I murmur. “So, is this friend some special one?” I wink at Kate.

“Hey, knock it off! Don’t get naughty here.” She smiles at me.

“Cool! I think that smile speaks louder than your words, Miss Smith.” I grin.

“Nothing yet but trust me, you guys are gonna love him. He’s amazing.” She pours water in a glass.

“Of course! My future uncle is bound to be amazing.”

She gives me a bright grin sparkling her already sparkly blue eyes.

You suck big time, Evelyn!

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