Exes and Exorcisms by Keira Blackwood (uplifting book club books .txt) 📗

“Peter! Go away!” I shouted, spying him past Xavier’s shoulder.

Xavier pulled back with a growl and spun to block me from Peter’s view.

“Ew, gross!” Peter said. “Gross, gross, gross! Why are you doing that to my sister? Stop!”

Xavier stood taller in front of me.

“Get out of here, Peter,” I said, “before I kill you a second time.”

I’d been so close to climaxing.

“I’m never coming down here again,” Peter shouted as he stomped back upstairs. There was a loud bang as Marla’s door slammed shut.

Xavier turned around. “Okay,” he said with a tight smile on his face. “Where were we?”

“You were about to make me come,” I said, feeling desperate. I wanted more than his mouth on my tits, though. I wanted all of him—and I wanted him inside me, fucking me into oblivion.

Although our two-year relationship had been lacking in certain essentials, like him not trusting me to basically take care of myself, and my inability to stand up to him when I disagreed, one thing had always been perfect—sex.

I grabbed the waistband of his pants and unfastened his belt. There was enough space for me to fit my hand inside his pants, and I wrapped my fingers around his long, thick erection. He groaned and gave a gentle thrust into my grip.

The store phone rang. It was a landline and had an answering machine and everything, so I ignored it.

Then Cordelia’s voice sounded over the answering machine. “Hey, Kelly, it’s Cordelia. I tried your cell, but you didn’t answer. I’m calling you about the spell to—”

Libido instantly tamed, I ran to the phone and picked it up. “Hey, this is Kelly. How’s it going?”

Cordelia sounded puzzled. “It’s fine. You?”

“Oh, good. You know, just catching up with Xavier.”

“Ah.” She understood what I wasn’t saying—that we couldn’t discuss any details right now. “Do you think you could swing by sometime this afternoon?”

I glanced over at Xavier. Cordelia’s interruption was perfect timing. I didn’t need to make any more mistakes with this guy. “I can come over right now and check it out,” I said.

“Great, see you soon.” She hung up.

Xavier was facing me. “You have to go somewhere?”

And here it came. The argument that I couldn’t go anywhere alone, that I didn’t know how to protect myself. He’d put his foot down and I’d capitulate, and...no. No, I would not capitulate. I was a motherfucking vampire and I would stand up for myself.

“Yep,” I said. “I need to run an errand.”

He bit his lip, buckled his belt. “Okay. Be careful out there.”

“Yes,” I said in my firm, newly-polished, don’t-fuck-with-me voice, “I am going, and you can’t stop me—wait. You just told me to be careful?”

“Yeah,” he said, a half-smile on his lips. It was a sexy smile. A charming smile. An I’ve-got-your-number-now smile.

“Right,” I said. “Off I go, then. Laters.”

CORDELIA LEANED over the counter of the doughnut truck and passed me a shoebox. I looked at the label. “Nice. I’ve always wanted a pair of Louboutins.”

She laughed. “Me, too. Pearl pays good money on eBay for those boxes. She has a vision wall full of them, all stacked up and waiting for her shoes.”

“She buys the boxes on eBay?” I asked. “Without shoes in them?”

Cordelia laughed again. “Like any of us could afford the actual shoes. Anyway, I’ll need the box back. I just didn’t think you’d want to walk around carrying a phallic object.”

“A—what?”

“The banishing spell requires a phallus,” she said with a shrug.

I cracked open the top of the box to peek. Sure enough, nestled in sparkly tissue paper and shimmering with something that looked oily and smelled like spicy herbs, was a dildo. It was green and spiked, like it belonged on a very large alien.

“Requires a phallus?” I said skeptically. “You just want me to have to hit him with this, don’t you?”

“That would be pretty freaking funny, wouldn’t it?” she said. “And it’s not far from the truth. If the tip of the phallus touches a man’s head, the man will forever be banished from your sight.”

I raised my eyebrows. “That sounds really powerful...and quite permanent, to boot.”

“It is. However, it only works once. This isn’t reusable magic. So if you have more ex-boyfriends you need to banish, you’ll need a new phallus.”

“No, I just have the one. Tip to forehead, and then he’s gone,” I said. “Simple as that?”

“You also have to proclaim who or what you want banished. So, like, ‘Shifter, I banish you.’” She gazed into my eyes, her indigo irises catching the sunlight. “If you use it, it works for good,” she said. “So be sure about this.”

“Great, it’s perfect,” I said. “Thank you. What do I owe you?”

She waved a hand. “I’m sure I’ll need a favor at some point.”

Usually that kind of quote gave me the shivers, but Cordelia was awesome, and I was happy owing her a favor.

With the box under my arm, I walked back to the tattoo parlor. When I saw a park on the way, though, I made a detour. I wasn’t ready to face Xavier again. I’d been about three seconds from wrapping my lips around his cock and showing him a good time. The man scrambled my head, made it impossible to think.

Now, with this spell, I could send him away forever. It’s what I’d wanted since he showed up, wasn’t it?

Then why did my gut feel all twisted and unhappy at the thought of actually using the spell?

9

XAVIER

Kelly had been gone a long time on her errand. It hadn’t even been lunchtime yet when she left, and it was already evening now. The old me would have worried. But I wasn’t going to worry now. Kelly was capable, and even with our history, this thing happening between us was new. The rules were different because we were both different, and that gave me hope that it might actually work out this time.

Even if it didn’t work out, smothering her wasn’t good for