Much Ado About Nothing - William Shakespeare (ebook reader web .txt) 📗

intermingle with them. But for which of my good parts did you first suffer love for me? Benedick Suffer love! a good epithet! I do suffer love indeed, for I love thee against my will. Beatrice In spite of your heart, I think; alas, poor heart! If you spite it for my sake, I will spite it for yours; for I will never love that which my friend hates. Benedick Thou and I are too wise to woo peaceably. Beatrice It appears not in this confession: there’s not one wise man among twenty that will praise himself. Benedick An old, an old instance, Beatrice, that lived in the time of good neighbours. If a man do not erect in this age his own tomb ere he dies, he shall live no longer in monument than the bell rings and the widow weeps. Beatrice And how long is that, think you? Benedick Question: why, an hour in clamour and a quarter in rheum: therefore is it most expedient for the wise, if Don Worm, his conscience, find no impediment to the contrary, to be the trumpet of his own virtues, as I am to myself. So much for praising myself, who, I myself will bear witness, is praiseworthy: and now tell me, how doth your cousin? Beatrice Very ill. Benedick And how do you? Beatrice Very ill too. Benedick Serve God, love me and mend. There will I leave you too, for here comes one in haste. Enter Ursula. Ursula Madam, you must come to your uncle. Yonder’s old coil at home: it is proved, my Lady Hero hath been falsely accused, the prince and Claudio mightily abused; and Don John is the author of all, who is fled and gone. Will you come presently? Beatrice Will you go hear this news, signior? Benedick I will live in thy heart, die in thy lap and be buried in thy eyes; and moreover I will go with thee to thy uncle’s. Exeunt. Scene III

A church.

Enter Don Pedro, Claudio, and three or four with tapers. Claudio Is this the monument of Leonato? A Lord It is, my lord. Claudio Reading out of a scroll.

Done to death by slanderous tongues
Was the Hero that here lies:
Death, in guerdon of her wrongs,
Gives her fame which never dies.
So the life that died with shame
Lives in death with glorious fame.

Hang thou there upon the tomb,
Praising her when I am dumb.
Now, music, sound, and sing your solemn hymn.

Song.

Pardon, goddess of the night,
Those that slew thy virgin knight;
For the which, with songs of woe,
Round about her tomb they go.
Midnight, assist our moan;
Help us to sigh and groan,
Heavily, heavily:
Graves, yawn and yield your dead,
Till death be uttered,
Heavily, heavily.

Claudio

Now, unto thy bones good night!
Yearly will I do this rite.

Don Pedro

Good morrow, masters; put your torches out:
The wolves have prey’d; and look, the gentle day,
Before the wheels of Phoebus, round about
Dapples the drowsy East with spots of grey.
Thanks to you all, and leave us: fare you well.

Claudio Good morrow, masters: each his several way. Don Pedro

Come, let us hence, and put on other weeds;
And then to Leonato’s we will go.

Claudio

And Hymen now with luckier issue speed’s
Than this for whom we rend’red up this woe! Exeunt.

Scene IV

A room in Leonato’s house.

Enter Leonato, Antonio, Benedick, Beatrice, Margaret, Ursula, Friar Francis, and Hero. Friar Did I not tell you she was innocent? Leonato

So are the prince and Claudio, who accused her
Upon the error that you heard debated:
But Margaret was in some fault for this,
Although against her will, as it appears
In the true course of all the question.

Antonio Well, I am glad that all things sort so well. Benedick

And so am I, being else by faith enforced
To call young Claudio to a reckoning for it.

Leonato

Well, daughter, and you gentlewomen all,
Withdraw into a chamber by yourselves,
And when I send for you, come hither mask’d. Exeunt Ladies.
The prince and Claudio promis’d by this hour
To visit me. You know your office, brother:
You must be father to your brother’s daughter,
And give her to young Claudio.

Antonio Which I will do with confirm’d countenance. Benedick Friar, I must entreat your pains, I think. Friar To do what, signior? Benedick

To bind me, or undo me; one of them.
Signior Leonato, truth it is, good signior,
Your niece regards me with an eye of favour.

Leonato That eye my daughter lent her: ’tis most true. Benedick And I do with an eye of love requite her. Leonato

The sight whereof I think you had from me,
From Claudio and the prince: but what’s your will?

Benedick

Your answer, sir, is enigmatical:
But, for my will, my will is your good will
May stand with ours, this day to be conjoin’d
In the state of honourable marriage:
In which, good friar, I shall desire your help.

Leonato My heart is with your liking. Friar And my help. Here comes the prince and Claudio. Enter Don Pedro and Claudio, and two or three others. Don Pedro Good morrow to this fair assembly. Leonato

Good morrow, prince; good morrow, Claudio:
We here attend you. Are you yet determined
Today to marry with my brother’s daughter?

Claudio I’ll hold my mind, were she an Ethiope. Leonato Call her forth, brother; here’s the friar ready. Exit Antonio. Don Pedro

Good morrow, Benedick. Why, what’s the matter,
That you have such a February face,
So full of frost, of storm and cloudiness?

Claudio

I think he thinks upon the savage bull.
Tush, fear not, man; we’ll tip thy horns with gold
And all Europa shall rejoice at thee,
As once Europa did at lusty Jove,
When he would play the noble beast in love.

Benedick

Bull Jove, sir, had an amiable low;
And some such strange bull leap’d your father’s cow,
And got a calf in that same noble feat
Much like to you, for you have just his bleat.

Claudio For this I owe you: here comes other reckonings. Re-enter Antonio, with the Ladies masked. Which is the lady I must seize upon? Antonio This