Man and Superman - George Bernard Shaw (read an ebook week txt) 📗
- Author: George Bernard Shaw
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parties, wasting her life and her money. We suddenly learn that she has turned from these sillinesses to the fulfilment of her highest purpose and greatest function—to increase, multiply and replenish the earth. And instead of admiring her courage and rejoicing in her instinct; instead of crowning the completed womanhood and raising the triumphal strain of “Unto us a child is born: unto us a son is given,” here you are—you who have been as merry as Brigs in your mourning for the dead—all pulling long faces and looking as ashamed and disgraced as if the girl had committed the vilest of crimes.
Ramsden
Roaring with rage. I will not have these abominations uttered in my house. He smites the writing table with his fist.
Tanner
Look here: if you insult me again I’ll take you at your word and leave your house. Ann: where is Violet now?
Ann
Why? Are you going to her?
Tanner
Of course I am going to her. She wants help; she wants money; she wants respect and congratulation. She wants every chance for her child. She does not seem likely to get it from you: she shall from me. Where is she?
Ann
Don’t be so headstrong, Jack. She’s upstairs.
Tanner
What! Under Ramsden’s sacred roof! Go and do your miserable duty, Ramsden. Hunt her out into the street. Cleanse your threshold from her contamination. Vindicate the purity of your English home. I’ll go for a cab.
Ann
Alarmed. Oh, Granny, you mustn’t do that.
Octavius
Broken-heartedly, rising. I’ll take her away, Mr. Ramsden. She had no right to come to your house.
Ramsden
Indignantly. But I am only too anxious to help her. Turning on Tanner. How dare you, sir, impute such monstrous intentions to me? I protest against it. I am ready to put down my last penny to save her from being driven to run to you for protection.
Tanner
Subsiding. It’s all right, then. He’s not going to act up to his principles. It’s agreed that we all stand by Violet.
Octavius
But who is the man? He can make reparation by marrying her; and he shall, or he shall answer for it to me.
Ramsden
He shall, Octavius. There you speak like a man.
Tanner
Then you don’t think him a scoundrel, after all?
Octavius
Not a scoundrel! He is a heartless scoundrel.
Ramsden
A damned scoundrel. I beg your pardon, Annie; but I can say no less.
Tanner
So we are to marry your sister to a damned scoundrel by way of reforming her character! On my soul, I think you are all mad.
Ann
Don’t be absurd, Jack. Of course you are quite right, Tavy; but we don’t know who he is: Violet won’t tell us.
Tanner
What on earth does it matter who he is? He’s done his part; and Violet must do the rest.
Ramsden
Beside himself. Stuff! lunacy! There is a rascal in our midst, a libertine, a villain worse than a murderer; and we are not to learn who he is! In our ignorance we are to shake him by the hand; to introduce him into our homes; to trust our daughters with him; to—to—
Ann
Coaxingly. There, Granny, don’t talk so loud. It’s most shocking: we must all admit that; but if Violet won’t tell us, what can we do? Nothing. Simply nothing.
Ramsden
Hmph! I’m not so sure of that. If any man has paid Violet any special attention, we can easily find that out. If there is any man of notoriously loose principles among us—
Tanner
Ahem!
Ramsden
Raising his voice. Yes sir, I repeat, if there is any man of notoriously loose principles among us—
Tanner
Or any man notoriously lacking in self-control.
Ramsden
Aghast. Do you dare to suggest that I am capable of such an act?
Tanner
My dear Ramsden, this is an act of which every man is capable. That is what comes of getting at cross purposes with Nature. The suspicion you have just flung at me clings to us all. It’s a sort of mud that sticks to the judge’s ermine or the cardinal’s robe as fast as to the rags of the tramp. Come, Tavy: don’t look so bewildered: it might have been me: it might have been Ramsden; just as it might have been anybody. If it had, what could we do but lie and protest as Ramsden is going to protest.
Ramsden
Choking. I—I—I—
Tanner
Guilt itself could not stammer more confusedly. And yet you know perfectly well he’s innocent, Tavy.
Ramsden
Exhausted. I am glad you admit that, sir. I admit, myself, that there is an element of truth in what you say, grossly as you may distort it to gratify your malicious humor. I hope, Octavius, no suspicion of me is possible in your mind.
Octavius
Of you! No, not for a moment.
Tanner
Drily. I think he suspects me just a little.
Octavius
Jack: you couldn’t—you wouldn’t—
Tanner
Why not?
Octavius
Appalled. Why not!
Tanner
Oh, well, I’ll tell you why not. First, you would feel bound to quarrel with me. Second, Violet doesn’t like me. Third, if I had the honor of being the father of Violet’s child, I should boast of it instead of denying it. So be easy: our friendship is not in danger.
Octavius
I should have put away the suspicion with horror if only you would think and feel naturally about it. I beg your pardon.
Tanner
My pardon! nonsense! And now let’s sit down and have a family council. He sits down. The rest follow his example, more or less under protest. Violet is going to do the state a service; consequently she must be packed abroad like a criminal until it’s over. What’s happening upstairs?
Ann
Violet is in the housekeeper’s room—by herself, of course.
Tanner
Why not in the drawing room?
Ann
Don’t be absurd, Jack. Miss Ramsden is in the drawing room with my mother, considering what to do.
Tanner
Oh! The housekeeper’s room is the penitentiary, I suppose; and the prisoner is waiting to be brought before her judges. The old cats!
Ann
Oh,
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