Here Be Dragons - 1 by Sharon Penman (best ebook reader android TXT) 📗

glimpses of another Will, glimpses of the boy he'd been an the man he mignt have become, and at such moments she would te the sadness of loss, and yet, at the same time, a curious sense of vin ' cation.She encouraged him to talk about Maude, and as painful as it she forced herself to listen attentively, prompted by a hazy hope dwelling upon happier memories might somehow help him to forge

605other, the horror. He talked sometimes of John, with such venom tK ste suspected he was testing her. She listened in silence to these emh^1 tered outbursts, without protest. It shamed her to remember her year ^ ing to v's^Worcester, to pray at John's tomb. Each time she thought ^rfrat had happened in the darkness of that Windsor dungeon, she w*' overcome with revulsion and self-loathing. To love a man capable <^ such cruelty was to condone it, even to make herself an accomplice Q sorts. And yet she had loved him, loved him and then grieved for hin Topaz rings and Maltese lapdogs and honeyed words.How cheapk she'd sold herself. How little it had taken to claim her heart."HOW could you have been so rash? Whatever were you thinking of, Will?"At first Will had been amused by Joanna's anger, but he was beginning to lose patience. "This is ridiculous, Joanna. All I did was to greet you when you entered the hall. I kissed your hand. Why should that give rise to gossip?""You kissed my palm, a lover's kiss! Jesus God, Will, what if someone had seen?"He shrugged. "But no one did, so why are you so fretful?" "Because Senena was standing not five feet away! You know how she hates me. If she ever suspected"He stepped toward her, silenced her with a lingering kiss. "Forget aboutSenena, love. Let's not waste time quarreling.""I do not want to quarrel. But it frightens me, Will, that you would fake such a risk, and it frightens me even more that you seem to find it amusing." Will was not listening, though, had pulled her back against him, encircling her within his arms, kissing her throat. Joanna yielded, allowed him to draw her down onto the blanket. "Promise me," she said huskily. "Promise me you'll not be so reckless."It may have been the quarrel, the fact that they'd resolved nothing.' may have been her realization that Will was excited by the danger of discovery, by the very risks she found so frightening. But for the first"We the magic failed to take. She could not shut off her thoughts, could ot surrender unconditionally to her body's needs, was unable to reach"flax. And afterward she was caught up in despair, hers the panicked flsations of a swimmer swept far beyond her depth. She turned on her6 so Will would not see that she wept. Never had her sense of fore-lng been so strong, a terrified certainty that this could end only in&edy. The Lord God was a God of wrath, would punish her for so a sin, would punish her and Will as they deserved. But what of

606Llewelyn? He would also suffer for her sin, and where was th f in that? airnessWill had been disappointed by their lovemaking; he was too enced not to know when a woman's response was genuine andh*^ was feigned. He was irked now by her prolonged silence, and h ^'' dered why women had to complicate things so unduly, why they h H"*" bring so much baggage into bed with them, remorse and regretst0 inevitably, recriminations. Such qualms rarely stopped them from ning, he thought, just from truly enjoying it. He'd hoped Joanna mig'ht be different, should have known what a frail hope that was Kni hr widow orKing's daughter, there was not a one of them who seem H capable of taking her pleasure as she found it, not even a woman lik Joanna, as passionate as any he'd ever bedded."Are you still vexed about Senena? Or are you having conscience pangs?""Is that so surprising? Need I remind you that adultery is a sin?"Will sighed, raised himself up on his elbow. "What kind of sins are there, Joanna?""What kinds? Mortal and venial," she said, sounding puzzled, and he shook his head."No, my love. There are secret sins and found-out sins, and it is foolish to worry about the first until it becomes the second. Think on it, Joanna. Who are we hurting as long as no one knows?" Leaning over, he nuzzled her neck."You're not the fool most women are; you ought to have learned that lesson by now."He meant that as a compliment, for he truly did think she was more intelligent than most of her sex, and he was taken aback by her reaction. She sat up abruptly, gave him a look of utter outrage."And just how am I to have learned such a lesson? By practice? You think I've done this before?""You're saying you've never taken a lover? I'm the first?" Will was surprised and pleased, but somewhat skeptical, too, and it showed in his face. Joanna jumped to her feet, began tugging at her disheveled clothing. He rose, too, put a hand upon her arm."I did not mean to offend you, love. I just did not expect it. You are a beautiful woman, after all, and must have had more than your share o offers."r, "And you think that is what determines infidelityopportunity^ Joanna was even angrier because she saw he was not taking ne seriously. "By your measure, the only wife to be trusted would as plain as homespun. How does your own wife figure in your^ tions, Will? I hear she's a handsome woman; am I to assume, she takes lovers?"

607"No " His voice was suddenly sharp "No, she does not ""I see " Joanna reached for her mantle, fumbled with the catch He tepped in front of her, barring her way5 "Joanna, you do not understand ""You explain it to me then, Will Explain