The Wings of the Dove - Henry James (classic literature books TXT) 📗

clear up. What it came to was that the sort of twaddle that was not in his chords was, unexpectedly, just what they happened this time not to want. They wanted his letters, for queer reasons, about as good as he could let them come; he was to play his own little tune and not be afraid; that was the whole point.

It would have been the whole, that is, had there not been a sharper one still in the circumstance that he was to start at once. His mission, as they called it at the office, would probably be over by the end of June, which was desirable; but to bring that about he must now not lose a week; his inquiries, he understood, were to cover the whole ground, and there were reasons of State⁠—reasons operating at the seat of empire in Fleet Street⁠—why the nail should be struck on the head. Densher made no secret to Kate of his having asked for a day to decide; and his account of that matter was that he felt he owed it to her to speak to her first. She assured him on this that nothing so much as that scruple had yet shown her how they were bound together; she was clearly proud of his letting a thing of such importance depend on her; but she was clearer still as to his instant duty. She rejoiced in his prospect and urged him to his task; she should miss him intensely⁠—of course she should miss him; but she made so little of it that she spoke with jubilation of what he would see and would do. She made so much of this last quantity that he laughed at her innocence, though also with scarce the heart to give her the real size of his drop in the daily bucket. He was struck at the same time with her happy grasp of what had really occurred in Fleet Street⁠—all the more that it was his own final reading. He was to pull the subject up⁠—that was just what they wanted; and it would take more than all the United States together, visit them each as he might, to let him down. It was just because he didn’t nose about and wasn’t the usual gossipmonger that they had picked him out; it was a branch of their correspondence with which they evidently wished a new tone associated, such a tone as, from now on, it would have always to take from his example.

“How you ought indeed, when you understand so well, to be a journalist’s wife!” Densher exclaimed in admiration, even while she struck him as fairly hurrying him off.

But she was almost impatient of the praise. “What do you expect one not to understand when one cares for you?”

“Ah then, I’ll put it otherwise and say ‘How much you care for me!’ ”

“Yes,” she assented; “it fairly redeems my stupidity. I shall, with a chance to show it,” she added, “have some imagination for you.”

She spoke of the future this time as so little contingent that he felt a queerness of conscience in making her the report that he presently arrived at on what had passed for him with the real arbiter of their destiny. The way for that had been blocked a little by his news from Fleet Street; but in the crucible of their happy discussion this element soon melted into the other, and in the mixture that ensued the parts were not to be distinguished. The young man moreover, before taking his leave, was to see why Kate had just spoken of the future as if they now really possessed it, and was to come to the vision by a devious way that deepened the final cheer. Their faces were turned to the illumined quarter as soon as he had answered her question in respect to the appearance of their being able to play a waiting game with success. It was for the possibility of that appearance that she had, a few days before, so earnestly pressed him to see her aunt; and if after his hour with that lady it had not struck Densher that he had seen her to the happiest purpose the poor facts flushed with a better meaning as Kate, one by one, took them up.

“If she consents to your coming, why isn’t that everything?”

“It is everything; everything she thinks it. It’s the probability⁠—I mean as Mrs. Lowder measures probability⁠—that I may be prevented from becoming a complication for her by some arrangement, any arrangement, through which you shall see me often and easily. She’s sure of my want of money, and that gives her time. She believes in my having a certain amount of delicacy, in my wishing to better my state before I put the pistol to your head in respect to sharing it. The time that will take figures for her as the time that will help her if she doesn’t spoil her chance by treating me badly. She doesn’t at all wish moreover,” Densher went on, “to treat me badly, for I believe, upon my honour, funny as it may sound to you, that she personally rather likes me, and that if you weren’t in question I might almost become her pet young man. She doesn’t disparage intellect and culture⁠—quite the contrary; she wants them to adorn her board and be named in her programme; and I’m sure it has sometimes cost her a real pang that I should be so desirable, at once, and so impossible.” He paused a moment, and his companion then saw that a strange smile was in his face⁠—a smile as strange even as the adjunct, in her own, of this informing vision. “I quite suspect her of believing that, if the truth were known, she likes me literally better than⁠—deep down⁠—you yourself do: wherefore she does me the honour to think that I may be safely left to kill my own cause. There, as I say, comes