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her fifth birthday. Taking care not to disturb her mother, she slid from their bed, pulled her gown over her head, and ran a wooden comb through her tangled dark hair. She knew she should wash her face, clean her teeth with a hazel twig, but she could not wait; the day, her very own, was beckoning.In the outer room, Maud still slept, rolled up in blankets by the hearth.Joanna tiptoed around her, searching for food to break the night's fast. The only furniture the room contained was a trestle table, a coffer chest, and several stools, but it was cluttered with household utensils: her mother's distaff and spindle, a pile of reeds that Maud meant to plait into baskets, the hand mill that Maud used to grind their corn, several letten pots and pans. In the corner an armful of peeled rushes was being steeped in tallow fat; Joanna's nose wrinkled at the pungent smell. Reassured by Maud's steady snoring, she broke off a chunk of thick, black rye bread, smeared it with cheese, and headed for the door.Outside, she detoured by the hen roost, soothed her conscience by scattering a handful of seeds in among the chickens. Joanna very much wanted her mother to think her responsible, did not mean to shirk her household duties. But the morning sky was clear and cloudless, the brilliant blue of her mother's eyes, and the wind rippled through the moorland grass, stirring up a billowing green sea that swept all before it as it raced for the distant silver of the RiverUre. Joanna let the wind take her, too; breaking into a run, she skimmed the grass, arms outstretched and hair streaming behind her like an ebony sail, and for a moment or two she actually was a small boat, bound for exotic, alien shores.She slowed as she approached the cottage, home to Cedric, the

75Saxon farmer who did for them those chores that required a n'S hand. Cedric's cottage looked, at first glance, much like their. thatched roof and timber framework, covered with clay, chopped w, anc[ cow dung. But it was much smaller, contained a single room,cedric, his wife, Eda, and their three children. Joanna had once neaked a look inside, knew they all slept on pallets around the hearth, lacking the straw mattress and wooden bedframe she shared with her mother. Nor did they have the feather pillows, the embroidered coverlets, or the hand mirror of polished metal, all of which Joanna's mother had brought with her from her home to the south, the homeJoanna had never seen.As early as it was, Cedric's family was already up and about. He was disappearing into the distance, on his way to the fields he worked with the other villagers. Eda was toting a bucket of milk toward the cottage, and the children were chasing the chickens out of the garden. They were making a noisy game of it, herding the hens in a circle, and Joanna felt a pang of envy, yearning to join in. She'd watched Cedric's children for months, knew the boy was called Derwin and his sisters Rowena and Elfrida, names strange and foreign-sounding to Joanna. She knew, too, that they were not proper playmates for her; Maud had warned her often enough of that. Saxon peasants, she'd said scornfully, bound to the land, who could be bought and sold and were born to serve. That had confused Joanna somewhat, for she knew that Maud, too, was a servant. Maud had nursed her mother, called her "lamb" and "sweeting," and yet she was still a servant; Joanna had heard her mother remind Maud of that more than once. So why, then, did she look upon Cedric and his family with such contempt?No, Joanna did not understand. It mattered little to her that Cedric's children were serfs, that they spoke an alien tongue. She would even have dared her mother's wrath, so lonely was she, so eager for friends. But Rowena and Elfrida had shied away from all her overtures, stared at her with suspicious, wary eyes, and at last she'd stopped trying. Yet she still wondered why they would not play with her. Was it because she was Norman?Because Cedric addressed her mother as "my lady"? Or because she was"different"?As young as she was, Joanna was aware of the irregular aspects of her homelife. She had no family but her mother. They had no friends, no visitors, and the past was a forbidden terrain, a land of dark secrets, secrets Joanna instinctively feared. There was so much she did not un-i *uerstand, but she sensed that what was wrong in their lives was somehow her fault.Now the other children had noticed her, were whispering among themselves, laughing. Joanna turned, walked away.

76But her spirits lifted, as always, at sight of the castle. She spent hours here some days, watching the people passing in and out of the bailey. Four times a year Maud would mount the steps into the keep, would pay the rent for their cottage to Guy, the bailiff for Robert Fit? Ranulf, Lord of Middleham.Joanna had begged in vain to accompany Maud on these quarter-day visits, and the world hidden away behind those timbered outer walls remained a mystery to her.Stretching out in the grass, she picked up a stick and cleared a space. Her mother was different from the villagers in yet another way; she could read and write. Very few women had such a skill, she'd told Joanna one night when wine had loosened her tongue, but her fatherJoanna's grandfatherhad permitted her to be taught with her brothers. "He was so proud of me, Joanna . . . once,"she whispered, and when she began to cry, Joanna cried, too; she dreaded her mother's tears even more than her slaps.Now she patted the earth till it was smooth, took the stick and laboriously scrawled her mother's name in the dirt: CLEMENCE. Then she traced JOANNA below it. But that was the extent of

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