First Kiss Last by Sara Miller (read e book .TXT) 📗

She wanted all this to be real. Leah wanted her life and home to be with Cade. If only. It made her incredibly sad.

She was overwhelmed by how much his simple words affected her and the amount of emotion they evoked. Leah could feel her heart beating. She knew the little piece she devoted to Cade oh so many years ago remained his.

And it had grown.

Chapter 20

Two weeks later, Leah was in a mood. Her period hadn’t started and she felt bloated and cranky. Times like this, she loathed her unexplained infertility even more. She often skipped several months in a row. One would think missing the curse would be a good thing, but it always left Leah out of sorts.

Her doctor had offered birth control multiple times in the past to keep her regulated but she always refused it. It would negate the purpose—she still prayed she would get pregnant. After all, she had done it once before . . . so maybe it was not too far-fetched to think it could happen again.

Leah sighed, feeling utterly defeated. It did not matter anymore. Maybe she should finally try the pill. After that one last time with Eric, the sex train had left the station, derailed the tracks, fell off a cliff, and gone out in a fiery inferno. Eric still called her babe, but she was sure it was nothing more than habit at this point. They now had zero physical contact. He’d even stopped the good night kiss on her head.

The only action she got now was with Cade. Leah smiled. Cade. Real life felt empty and miserable but her dreams with Cade continued to be emotionally rich and fulfilling.

In a recent dream, they had gone on an actual date: dinner and a movie. Sky babysat her brother, Leah dressed up, and Cade bought her flowers. It was very romantic.

Another time, she baked cupcakes for Liam’s seventh birthday. Both Cade and Liam tried to help. They made a delicious mess and a wonderful memory. She could still smell the sweet frosting and hear Liam’s giggles.

Sky, on the other hand, continued her teenager campaign. Leah wasn’t discouraged, though. Sky let her help with a math problem she was stuck on. Sure, the girl had called her a math dork but it sounded like good-natured teasing. Leah trusted they were moving forward.

Leah had more private time with Cade too. She vividly remembered several long nights in Cade’s bed. Leah blushed at those particular memories. Turns out, she really liked being on top.

Almost every night before bed, Leah would check her phone. Cade’s one-sided messages continued and she couldn’t stop herself from looking at them. It was the only piece of Cade she allowed herself in real life. Leah felt guilty. Guilty for not replying and guilty for keeping them. She treasured her dream memories and this little bit of evidence of them.

As she readied herself for bed, Leah anticipated tonight would probably be another dream night. She cuddled in, wondering what would be next.

♦

Leah could taste the pizza before she could smell it or feel it in her hand. She watched the room come into focus around her. One minute she was closing her eyes and the next she was eating pizza. Eating pizza on Cade’s couch. Sitting ridiculously close to him. Liam was sacked out on the floor watching a cartoon. Cade’s daughter was draped over the recliner chair, her pizza set off to the side because she was clearly a teen with a mission.

“But DAD!”

“No, Skyler. Ab-so-lutely NOT!” Cade’s jaw was clenched as he emphasized every syllable. If his tone did not scream that the discussion was over, his calling her Skyler instead of “Sky” did.

“So, what’d I miss?” Both father and daughter instantly turned to her. Sky’s displeasure didn’t change but Cade’s did. He smiled at her in a way that made her insides melt. Damn that man! Leah couldn’t help but smile back.

He slid his arm around her and gave her a tight squeeze. And when that was not enough, he leaned in and kissed her lips, greasy pizza and all. Mmm, he tasted delicious. And it wasn’t just the pizza. She wanted to gobble him up. Clearly her mind was headed in the wrong direction. Again. She had that problem a lot when she was with Cade. So she focused back to the disagreement.

“What’s the matter?” she posed the question directly to Sky.

“I want to get my nose pierced and Dad said no.”

“Damn right I said NO!”

“You’re impossible! You don’t listen. You don’t care what I want!”

“Well, you are the kid and I am the dad and this conversation is over.”

Cade did not budge. He laid down the law and that was that. Leah could feel how rigid his body was next to hers. The intensity of his opinion was backed by more than just his words. A quick peek at Sky confirmed she had come to the same conclusion. She sat with her legs up, arms wrapped around them, as if holding herself together. Her pizza lay completely abandoned. She wiped a tear from her eye and stared at the TV. After a few minutes, she quietly got up and left the room.

“Hey, your food!” Cade called after her but Sky ignored him.

“I got it,” Leah jumped up and grabbed the plate. Whisking it off to the kitchen before Cade could bellow. From the looks of it, Sky had only taken a few bites out of one of the two pieces on her plate. She checked the pizza boxes to be sure. This was not good. The entire Emerson family loved pizza. If Sky didn’t eat, she was really upset. She wrapped the plate and put it in the fridge.

Leah felt bad. She was sorry she asked, since apparently she had made things worse. She was hoping to hear more of the story, not just another version of them yelling at each other. She and Sky were not very close yet,