Christmas to Come: a heartbreaking coming of age saga set in London's East End by Carol Rivers (best motivational novels txt) 📗

cover enough. The warm winds that blew off the river brought the smell of the sea into the barge as Bella closed her eyes. But she was too exhausted to care if the tide came in and swallowed them up.

For the next two days they walked the length of the river from Limehouse to Blackwall. Bella asked in the cafe if they needed help, but the answer was always no.

The Salvation Army provided a meal and at night they returned to the barge. It was a dry, hot morning when they walked to Island Gardens. They sat on a bench and Terry groaned. He'd lost weight and was the colour of pastry. Bella listened to his racking coughs. She had to do something.

'Stay here, I won't be long.'

'Terry sick.'

'I know. I'm going to get Micky.'

He lay down on the bench with his head on the bundle of clothes they'd carried with them. She held his hand and said quietly, 'I won't be long.'

Then she ran all the way to Piper Street. If she had to go on bended knee to Micky she would. If she had to lick his boots, she would. She would do anything Micky asked if only he would help Terry.

Micky's black car was parked in the street. She caught her breath and stood still, staring up at the big house where she was now a stranger. What would she do if he turned her away? Or laughed in her face. But there was no one else she could turn to. No one who cared enough to help Terry.

Slowly she walked up to the big door. Like all the big houses in Piper Street, the long windows were shielded by lace curtains and Bella recognized them as the ones that had been there since Mrs Bryant had first hung them years ago. Briefly she recalled the memory of Sean washing them, Sean placing them on the line to dry and being ridiculed by his two brothers for the care he took in preserving them. Micky and Ronnie had always left the household chores to Sean who was a natural at cleaning and cooking. Following in his mum's footsteps, they always said. And though Bella had never known Mrs Bryant, her boys always talked about her whenever they had the chance.

She grasped the brass knocker, bringing it down three times. The door opened and Micky stood there. His face was as handsome as ever; He wore a white shirt and red and blue tie and she could smell the soap that he washed with. Everything about him made her heart race.

'Strike a light,' he mocked. 'Look who it isn't.'

'Can I come in?'

'What do you want?'

'To talk to you.'

'Oh, so now you've got the time of day for me, have you?' Micky sneered at her.

'I lost my job and Mum chucked me out.'

He nodded slowly as he looked her up and down. 'Nothing new there, then?'

Bella decided to come clean. 'We've been sleeping rough, anywhere we can.'

'You don't say.'

'Terry's sick, Micky.' Bella was almost pleading. She didn't know what else to do. 'I left him down Island Gardens on a bench.'

His brow smoothed out as he studied her. 'So what happened to Casanova?'

'If you mean Ray, I don't know. I haven't seen him since - '

'Since you told me to sling my hook,' he interrupted her angrily.

'I didn't mean to. I just lost my temper.'

'Yeah, with me. You should have taken it out on fancy pants.'

'Can I come in? I want to apologise.' For a minute she thought he was going to close the door, then he shrugged.

'I really am sorry, Micky,' she said as they stood in the hall. 'I shouldn't have said what I did.'

'And I'm supposed to forget that you was there on your knees mopping him up like Florence Nightingale?'

'He's just a friend honest, not even that. He's Dolly Taylor's brother, just someone to go out with once in a while. We went to the cinema a few times, but that was all. I soon got fed up. I was telling him I didn't want anything more to do with him when you came along.' She wrung her dirty fingers anxiously together. 'I was mad at you, that's why I said the things I did. Mad because I hadn't seen you and I thought you'd forgotten about me.'

He leaned against wall and stuffed his hands in his pockets. 'So what you're saying is, the purpose of this little visit is to ask for my help, right?'

She nodded. 'Terry's really sick.'

'And I'm supposed to jump to it, am I? Just because you've realized which side your bread is buttered.'

'I thought you didn't want me around any more.'

'That's your excuse, darlin' but I'm a busy man, Bells. Got a lot on my plate and you above all people should know that. And be fair now, me and Ronnie offered you a job and you turned us down. I mean, what was we supposed to do after that? We got more to think about than putting your life in order, which, you got to admit, we've done since both you and Terry was only just out of nappies. And would have gone on doing if you hadn't got all above yourself.'

Bella felt the tears sting in her eyes. 'The truth is I hated Dixons. I just didn't want you to think I couldn't make it on my own.'

'Yeah, well, you should've thought that one out a bit better.'

'I know. And I'm sorry.'

He looked at her for a long while, his dark eyes thoughtful. Then reaching for his jacket on the stand, he slung it over his shoulder. 'You've struck lucky, Bells,' he told her as he took her arm and steered her down the path. 'I'm in a good mood today.'

'Oh, Micky, thanks!'

'You know what, I expected more of you though, throwing the job in my face like you did and swanning off to Dixons.'

She nodded slowly, sad at the thought that she had let herself down in