Lady of Hay by Barbara Erskine (english love story books .TXT) 📗

am sorry. " Sam's face was carefully controlled. "Nick's a fool. You deserve better. "

She went back to the painting and stood staring at it. "That's right. And I mean to get it. Make no mistake about it, Dr. Franklyn, I mean to see that Nick leaves her for good. So if it's your mission in life to comfort Jo Clifford and see that she keeps calm and safe and sane, why don't you move in with her and send your brother to me. "

Sam turned and picked up his case. "I'll bear that in mind, " he said. He pulled open the door. "But if you'll take a piece of advice from me, I suggest you use a little more subtlety with Nick. If you behave like the proverbial fishwife he'll leave you for good. I know my brother. He likes his ladies sophisticated and in control. If he sees the mess in your kitchen he'll leave, and I wouldn't altogether blame him. "

He didn't wait to hear the string of expletives that echoed after him as he began to run down the stairs.

Jo was sitting on the cold concrete steps outside the library watching a pigeon waddling along in the gutter. Its neck shimmered with iridescent purples and greens as it moved unconcerned between the wheels of the stationary cars intent on gathering specks of food from the tarmac. The roar of traffic in the High Street a few yards away distracted it not at all. Nor did the scream of an accelerating motorbike a few feet from it. Behind her the library doors were unlocked at last.

Standing up slowly, she brushed the dust off her skirt, watching as the pigeon, startled into sleek slimness by her sudden movement, took off and swept with graceful speed up and over the rooftops toward the park.

As she ran up the echoing staircase to the library she became aware suddenly that she could hear her own heartbeats drumming in her ears. The sound was disconcerting and she stopped outside the glass swing doors to try to steady herself. Her head ached violently and her eyes were heavy with lack of sleep.

Taking a deep breath, she pushed through the doors and turned toward the reference section, skirting the tables where already students and newspaper readers were establishing their base camps for the day. As she pulled the notebook from her bag she realized that her hands had begun to shake.

Begin with The Dictionary of National Biography.

It was unlikely she would find Matilda there, but it was a place to start. She approached the shelf, her hand outstretched. Her fingers were trembling.

"Braos?" she murmured to herself. "Breos? I wonder how they spelled it. " There was a rustle of paper beside her as a large bespectacled priest turned to the racing page. He looked up and caught her eye. His wink was comforting.

She walked slowly along the shelf, squinting at the gold-lettered spines of the books, then she heaved out a volume and carried it to a table, perching uncomfortably on the very edge of the chair as she began to leaf through the pages.

Don't let it have been real... Please don't let it have been real.... I can't cope with that.... She shook her head angrily. The thick paper crackled a little, the small print blurring. A slightly musty smell floated from between the covers as the riffling pages stirred the hot air of the room.

... Bowen... Bradford... Branston... Braose, Philip de (fl. 1172) two inches of print, then Braose, William de (d. 1211). There were more than two pages.

She sat still for a moment, fighting her stomach. She could taste the bile in the back of her throat. Her forehead was damp and ice cold and her hands were burning hot. It was awhile before she became conscious that the priest was watching her closely and she realized suddenly that she had been staring at him hard, oblivious of everything but the need not to be sick. Somehow she forced herself to smile at him and she looked away.

She took a deep breath and stared down at the page. Was Matilda there, in the article that she could see at a glance was full of place names and dates? Had she lived long enough to make her mark on history and have her name recorded with her cruel, overbearing husband? Or had she flitted in and out of life like a shadow, leaving no trace at all, if she had ever existed?

The priest was still watching her, his kind face creased with concern. Jo knew that any minute he was going to stand up and come over to her. She looked away again hastily. She had to look up Richard de Clare, too, and Abergavenny, and make notes on them all. Then, perhaps, she would go and have a cup of coffee and accept the consolations of the Church if they were offered.

It was several minutes before the intercom on the doorstep below Jo's apartment crackled into life. Sam bent toward the display board.

"Nick? It's Sam. Let me come up. "

Nick was waiting on the landing as Sam walked slowly up the carpeted stairs. "You're too late, " he said brusquely. "She went to a hypnotist yesterday and let him regress her. "

Sam followed him into the brightness of the apartment and stared around. "What happened? Where is she?" He faced his brother coldly, taking in the dark rings beneath Nick's eyes and the unshaven stubble.

"She had gone before I woke up. " Nick ran his fingers through his hair. "I think she was okay. She was last night. Just shocked and rather frightened. She had a long session that seemed to get out of control. The hypnotist couldn't bring her back to consciousness. She seemed to get so involved in what was happening, it was so real to her. "

"You were with her?" Sam turned on him sharply.

"Of course not! Do you think I'd have let her go!