a Pleasure Rites, #1 by Ines Johnson (top ten books of all time TXT) 📗

himself from jerking. Not away from her, into her. The feel of her lips was warm, like a shock of lightening. When she pulled away from him, sadness tarnished the gold in her eyes. She looked over her shoulder at Dain and then back at Khial.

"I'll leave you two alone," Chanyn said. She walked out of the room and closed the door behind her.

Khial stood frozen in the center of the room. This place that had been his haven for years. He'd sneak into this room and curl up behind the golden warmth of Dain. Dain was always warm and vibrant, even when caught in the grip of his illness. He was a sun that refused to set. Tonight the room was cold.

Khial looked at Dain who, instead of coming fully alert, had lowered himself to the bed once more. His eyes looked faraway. He could feel Dain leaving. Khial climbed onto the bed and took Dain's hand in his own.

"It's my fault," Khial blurted.

Dain blinked. His foggy gaze focusing on Khial. "What's your fault, my love?"

"Your family's death. It was my mother."

"Khi, what are you talking about?"

"My mother. She caused the crash that killed your parents."

Dain looked at him like a child. "You can't believe that. She was in prison. It was an accident."

Khial shook his head. There were no such things as accidents or coincidences where his mother was concerned. "I've spent all these years trying to make up for it. I've dedicated my life to you, for her crimes."

"Are you trying to tell me you never loved me? That you were only with me out of obligation?"

Khial looked at Dain horrified, but he could tell the other man didn't believe the words he'd spoken.

"Khial, you have filled my life with more happiness and love than any being deserves. My parents saw it, and thanked the Goddess every day for you. Chanyn sees it, too. It’s why she agreed to come into the bond. Take care of her when I'm gone. Her and the baby."

Dain had gone delirious. "There is no baby, Dain."

Dain only smiled. He was struggling now to keep his eyes open.

Khial panicked. "Dain! Wait! I love you. I love you, damn it!"

Dain focused once more on Khial, a burst of sunshine before an eclipse. "You think I didn't know that. I knew you did from the first moment you looked at me. I knew I loved you before I walked into the door of the music room. I thought, only the most beautiful human being could make those beautiful sounds. And I was right." Dain smiled and closed his eyes.

"Dain, no. Please don't leave me."

"I'm not leaving. I'll never leave you. I'm going to the Goddess, but I'm leaving my heart. You'll share it with them, won't you Khi?"

Khial would agree to anything to keep Dain's eyes open. "Yes, Dain. I'll share it."

Dain opened his eyes once more. They were so full of love. Khial held that look. He held it for as long as he could. He held it until the light went out of Dain's eyes. And in the end, it was by Khial's hand that Dain's lifeless eyes were closed.

21

Jian watched the contractors depart through the front doors of the temple. The new roof was complete, along with many other repairs that had been neglected for the past few years. Jian watched from the doorway as the men piled their tools into the back of their conveyance and then climbed into the front. One man turned back and shouted something.

Jian pointed to his ear, trying to indicate that he couldn't hear the man.

The contractor beckoned Jian forward.

Standing at the edge of the threshold, Jian shook his head. His lips pressed together in a grimace.

The contractor frowned as he hefted himself out of the conveyance and came trudging back to the doorway.

"My apologies," said Jian. "I am bound to the temple. I may not cross the threshold."

The man's face straightened in understanding, but then frowned again. How could he understand a man being confined without bars or restraints? This confinement was of Jian's own choosing. The vow of celibacy came with total dedication to the temple and the Goddess.

The contractor reminded Jian of the necessary follow up service dates and then took his leave once more. Jian watched the man go. The car went in the direction of Lord Dain's manse. Jian allowed himself one more second in the cool open air, and then he retreated into the sanctuary.

The exterior of the temple received a fresh coat of paint, but when Jian looked closely, he still saw the cracks and crumbling in the brick. The roof was repaired, but Jian still needed to sort out the refuse above his head in the attic. As the building received work on its exterior structure, there was much work to be done for the inner workings to return to their former glory.

Jian escaped into the heart of the temple, the Sanctuary, where all the monks met daily to show their devotion to the Goddess. The room was empty now, at midday. Jian stood for a moment in the silence.

Elder Gerry appeared beside Jian. "We have two more new recruits today, my brother."

Four young males had been brought to the temple by families. Proof that word of Jian's success with Lady Chanyn had spread.

"You've done it, my boy." Elder Gerry glowed with pride.

It took everything Jian had to muster the briefest of smiles.

"I think it was a wise decision to take the vow," the elder man continued. "Now you can put all of your heart into training the next generation of hounds."

All of his heart? Jian looked around at the empty Sanctuary. He couldn't tell the elder man that he'd left his prized teaching tool with the woman responsible for his success. Jian urged away the thought of Chanyn's smile, her body, the feel of her lips on his. He did not berate himself for the thoughts, only the timing.

Tonight, he promised himself.

Like all nights.