To Dare a Rogue - Lana Williams (novels for beginners TXT) 📗

about it. “And introduce Lady Barbara to Lord Samuelson at the first opportunity.”

Margaret chuckled. “If only it would be so easy.”

“One can always hope. For without it, we have little left to keep our spirits up.” Charlotte intended to hold onto hers with both hands for as long as possible. Unfortunately, James was the key to that hope.

~*~

James sipped a glass of lemonade, wondering how soon he could leave. His mother’s sister, Aunt Prudence, hosted a garden party each spring for as long as he could remember and this year was no exception.

“Such a perfect day, isn’t it?” His mother smiled at several acquaintances even as she nudged him with her elbow when he didn’t respond. “You’re supposed to agree, dear.”

“Indeed.” He had agreed to come only after his mother coerced him. While he enjoyed spending time with her, attending a garden party wasn’t his preferred type of gathering. Then again, few were.

“James, if you don’t at least pretend to be enjoying yourself, not only will you hurt Aunt Prudence’s feelings, you’ll hurt mine.”

“My apologies, Mother. Your company is splendid as always. I’m afraid my thoughts were on something else.” He looked up at the cloudless blue sky, a rarity in London, determined to try harder for her sake. “The weather is certainly perfect.”

She nodded then looped her arm through his. “And the flowers your aunt takes such pride in?”

“Delightful.” He returned her smile. “Is that better?”

“Yes, thank you.” She continued to study him, making him wonder what she saw. “I’m so very happy to have you here this year.”

He blinked as memories of where he’d spent the previous year threatened. Now wasn’t the time to be overwhelmed by the past. “I’m happy to be here with you as well.”

And he truly was. He only wished the old, carefree version of himself had returned. Yet moments such as this were among the reasons he and his fellow soldiers had fought. So England would be free to enjoy days just like this.

“Viscount Redmond,” an older gentleman greeted them as he held out his hand.

“Lord Mumford. Good to see you in fine health.” James shook his hand. He hadn’t seen the lord since his return. Mumford was a friend of his father’s and always had a kind word for James.

“May I say the same of you? I’ve kept track of your efforts since you bought your commission. I’m proud to say I know you. Thank you for the years you spent protecting England’s shores.”

The warm remarks only made James feel inadequate. He was no hero. However, Mumford had spent many years in Her Majesty’s Royal Navy and received numerous accolades for his efforts. He didn’t seem to suffer from terrible memories the way James did.

“We’re proud of him as well,” his mother said. “And so pleased to have him home again.” She turned when someone called her name then excused herself to greet a friend.

“How has your return been?” Mumford asked.

James frowned, not certain of the older man’s meaning.

Mumford shifted to stand beside James so they were both looking out over the garden, watching those wandering along its paths. “It’s been years, but I will never forget how I felt when I came back. Your family wants the same man you were when you departed. But you’re not.”

James drew a quick breath, surprised at the understanding in the older man’s words. “Yes.” He couldn’t say more without releasing a tangled web of emotions that were better left contained.

“Nor did things here remain the same.” Mumford nodded. “Friends, family, and acquaintances moved on with their lives while you attempt to pick up the threads of where you left off.”

That was only a part of his problem. The other part was adjusting to the realization of who he was while trying to determine who he wanted to be.

Mumford turned to face James. “Give it time. Be patient with yourself and others. They can’t imagine what you went through, nor do you really want them to.”

“I confess I am not who I thought I was. That has been one of the biggest struggles to sort through.”

“So few of us are truly tested in life. Events mold and shape us. They change us. Sometimes for the better. Occasionally for the worse. The challenge is to stay focused on the better parts.” Mumford patted his shoulder. “You’ll come through on the other side. I have no doubt.”

James watched the lord move on to speak with another gentleman. Though he longed to call him back and ask how he’d found his way back to normalcy, he didn’t. For the moment, it was enough to know he wasn’t alone in the way he felt.

“Lord Mumford is a gem, don’t you think?”

James turned to see Charlotte at his side. He drank in the sight of her, appreciating the way her presence cleared his dark thoughts like the sun spreading warmth and light on a cloudy day. “I didn’t realize you were coming.”

“I haven’t missed one of your aunt’s garden parties in years. Though I never realized she was your aunt until yesterday. Mother came as well.” She tipped her head, and he followed her gaze to see Lady Wynn speaking with his aunt.

“Are you feeling better?” he asked. Charlotte looked beautiful, wearing a pale yellow gown with a straw bonnet, the ribbon tied along her jaw. He wanted to take her arm and find a private spot where he could be with her and only her.

“I am. Thanks to you.” She looked down, her long lashes hiding her thoughts for a moment. “I’m grateful you came to my rescue.”

He tensed at the thought of what Lord Palmer had attempted. Of what he could’ve done if James hadn’t come along.

“I couldn’t help but overhear some of what Lord Mumford said. What was it like?” Charlotte asked.

“What?”

“The war. The fighting. The battles.”

He shook his head. “Nothing you should hear.”

“But surely carrying all those terrible memories is too much of a burden for any one person to bear. I know my