The Lying, the Witch, and the Werewolf (Down & Dirty Supernatural Cleaning Services Book 4) by Kate Quinn (uplifting books for women .txt) 📗

to the entrance and I wonder how the hell I’m going to get inside. We pass another table and I stop dead in my tracks. It’s manned by Adorra and Kama. Hairy Underwood sits on the table, overseeing the endeavor with a Humans First baseball cap on his head, as if this disguises his supernatural nature from the crowd.

I can’t believe Kama would bring him here and put him in danger; this crowd would tear the old guy apart on principle. But then I notice people patting his head as they pass by and someone at the back of the crowd near me says, “That’s the way to take care of the supes. Stuff and mount them.”

He and his friend yuck it up at that, and for a moment I’m tempted to say screw them all and just go home. These assholes don’t deserve my help. Let them eat chocolate. And they definitely will, because Adorra and Kama are pressing bars into outstretched hands.

And people are eating it up. Literally.

“This is absolutely the best chocolate I have ever tasted,” one man says.

“Can I have another bar for my husband?” a woman asks.

“This is divine!” someone says, pushing past me.

“No!” I shout and run forward, slapping the chocolate out of a man’s hand and then rushing the table.

“Ow, you hippy bitch. What the hell?”

“Don’t eat the chocolate!” I shout. “It will kill you!”

I’m now face to face with Adorra and Kama. “Nonsense,” Adorra says. “It’s perfectly safe.”

“Tell that to the people who died,” Nico says, blocking the line from grabbing chocolate. “From poison!” He has his hoodie pulled up over his face so he can’t smell the chocolate.

“Hey buddy, move out of the way,” a man yells at him. Nico turns and gives him his not fucking around look and the man backs away. “Sorry bro. You go ahead.”

“I know about the belladonna.” I swallow hard, wondering what poor innocent Adorra decided to experiment on.

Adorra’s eyes narrow. “You idiot. I did one small experiment with belladonna and then realized it was too risky and threw the bar away.”

“But I found them,” Kama trills from beside her, looking slyly pleased in her vague sort of way. “I gave them to my lovers who especially pleased me…” She frowns. “It didn’t agree with their tummies.”

“No, it didn’t,” Adorra agrees with a sigh. She turns her attention back to me. “Not that it’s any of your business, but by the time I realized what had happened, it was too late. Was it a tragedy? Yes, of course it was. But it was also an accident. We would never harm another living creature.”

”I miss them,” Kama says sadly. “They knew how to please me.” She starts throwing the chocolate bars over our heads to the waiting crowd.

I stare at Kama and then back to Adorra, wondering if I should believe them. But it all seems to fit. Still, it’s not like this candy bar handout isn’t still wrong in a hundred different ways.

“We know what the secret ingredient is,” I tell them. “Incubus semen. What’s the plan if it’s not to kill these people? Embarrass them by making them have an orgy in the streets?”

Adorra shakes her head. “I had hoped you would shape up, Paige, but I really don’t think you’re Together We Come material.

“I don’t want to be in your stupid cult!” I shout.

Adorra gasps. “We are a social movement, Paige! And if you had one iota of sense you would know that we would never make anyone do anything against their will.”

“It’s working!” Kama yells, clapping. “Our plan is working!”

I look around, but no one is dying, no one is screwing in the streets. The man next to me —who just gulped down his candy bar— stops suddenly. “I really desire cake.” He turns to the woman next to him, presumably his wife.

“Honey, let’s go get a cake and eat it in a hot tub.”

“But...the rally…” she trails off. “Oh, let’s go get a cake then find a hotel room. I desire to feel like a dirty whore!” She claps her hand over her mouth. “I can’t believe I just admitted that,” she tells the people around her.

“What is happening?” Nico asks.

“I desire to wear women's underwear,” another man says. “The nice stuff.”

“I desire all these supe men I’m always shouting about hating.”

“I desire a cold drink and a hot porno,” a woman adds.

Kama is jumping up and down with Hairy, hugging him to her chest. “This is glorious!” she shouts.

I turn back to Adorra. “This was the plan?”

Adorra nods. “It was Hairy’s plan. Kama told us all about it. Make hateful people face their desires, admit them aloud. We’ve been tweaking the chocolate formula for years.”

I look to Nico, who looks more amused than upset by this information. He lifts an eyebrow as if to say, I told you so. If the chocolate makes you come face to face with your desires, than Nico and I admitted last night what we’ve been dancing around for years: We want to fuck each other silly.

People around us are shouting out more desires and the crowd is dispersing as people wander off to find something that they really want. A few are left, holding signs and shouting that they desire a pure human society because supes scare them and make them feel inadequate. At least they’re being honest.

“Oh, we got a couple of live ones!” Kama says as a couple begin to have sex on the sidewalk.

“I desire to have sex outside,” the woman says.

“I desire to have an audience,” the man shouts.

So, some inappropriate sex, but not nearly what I was expecting.

“You...you never wanted to kill anyone?” I ask again, to be absolutely clear. Kama is now dancing with Hairy, twirling him around. She giggles gleefully.

“No. We don’t want to kill anyone.” Her voice has a weird inflection when she says we.

But somebody else does…?

“Giselle!” I shout. “What is she up to?”

“My little sister only desires one thing, and that’s the love of