LEAD ME ON by Julie Ortolon (best pdf ebook reader TXT) 📗

and make an idiot of myself. But then he looked at me, looked right at me, and smiled. I don’t even remember what he said, just that he was talking to me, and then he took my books and walked me to my next class, and everyone was looking at us. I’d never been the center of attention before. It was frightening. And the most wonderful thing that had ever happened to me.

“The next few weeks were a fairy tale. Peter poured attention on me. I met all the popular kids. I mean, I knew most of them, because Adrian was ... well, Adrian—Mr. Jock—and the girls were even more crazy over him than Peter—a fact that always seemed to make Peter mad.” She frowned, because she hadn’t realized that then, but it seemed quite clear now. Peter had always become irritable when her brother’s name came up. “No matter. The important thing is, I wasn’t just Adrian’s shy sister anymore. I was wearing Peter Basset’s letter jacket.

“I was so in awe. And so stupid.” She balled her hand into a fist against his chest as tears filled her throat. “He told me ... he loved me. And I believed him! God, I was so stupid. He was Peter Basset, part of the Galveston elite, the country club set. He talked about us being together forever. And I believed him!”

Scott’s arms tightened and he murmured against her hair. “Come on, let it all out.”

“The first time I let him ... the first time we ... were together... it was awful. I felt so empty afterward. I’d expected it to be wonderful, for it to fill some void inside me, but it just hurt and felt all wrong. I told myself that it would get better, and when it didn’t, I told myself it was my fault. There was something lacking in me, that I expected too much. Peter was perfect, and I was this mousy little nobody.”

“You are not mousy,” he said fiercely. “And you are not a nobody.”

“But I felt like nobody.” She sniffed against a new rise of tears. “Even when I was with him. So, I concentrated on pleasing him and I dreamed about the future. I spent hours writing my married name in my school notebooks. Allison Basset. Mrs. Peter Basset. Mr. and Mrs. Basset.

“When I realized I was pregnant, I was frightened, but I was also excited. Because I thought we wouldn’t have to wait until we were older to marry. We’d marry right away, I’d cook and clean for him while he went to college, then we’d get a house, raise a family, and everything would be wonderful.”

She lay very still for a while, focusing on the feel of Scott’s hand stroking her hair. “We had a date that night. I floated through the whole evening, smiling at his friends, thinking they would be my friends, too. They’d attend our wedding, as Peter and I would attend theirs. We’d all raise our children together.

“Then Peter took me home, stopping at one of his favorite ‘parking’ places on the way.” She clung to Scott, wishing she could stop the memories now, but they kept coming. “We made out in the back seat of his Camaro. I felt as empty as ever when it was over, but told myself it was okay. Lots of girls don’t enjoy doing it. I loved Peter. That’s all that mattered.

“Afterward, I told him about the baby. Oh God.” She buried her face in Scott’s chest. “He was horrified. I tried to reassure him, to tell him we’d work it out, and that’s when ... That’s when he ... he started to laugh.”

She swiped the hair away from her face, clenching her teeth. “He said he couldn’t believe I took anything he’d said seriously. I was a Bouchard. That’s how the old families in Galveston always think of us, no matter our last name. We’re theater people, descended from a French prostitute. Surely I never really believed he’d want to marry me. He said... he said the only reason he asked me out in the first place was because the other football players said I wouldn’t ‘put out’ for anyone.”

She squeezed her eyes shut. “I was nothing but a challenge to him, a way to prove to the rest of the team how macho he was. He told me I had to get an abortion. Ordered me to. But I refused.

“The next few weeks were so awful, I can’t even remember them correctly. I told Adrian I was pregnant, and he talked me into telling Aunt Viv. But we never told Rory. She still doesn’t know.” She looked at him, suddenly frantic. “So you can’t tell her. You can’t tell anyone.”

“Of course I won’t.”

She dropped her head back to his shoulder. “Aunt Viv was furious. Not at me. At Peter. She wanted to confront his parents and file a paternity suit. I swear, if he’d been older, she’d have filed statutory rape charges, but I talked her out of it. I just wanted my baby. It wasn’t Peter’s anymore. It was mine.” She clutched her fist to her breast. “I wanted it so badly.

“I remember the first time I felt it move. For nearly a month, I dreamed and worried over the life growing inside me. Oh God, I wanted my baby!”

Tears scalded her cheek and dampened Scott’s shirt, but he still held on to her. “One night, I woke up with terrible cramps and I was bleeding. Aunt Viv rushed me to the hospital. There was nothing they could do. I wanted my baby. I wanted it so much.”

Her shoulders jerked with sobs and her throat closed. As Scott rocked her and cooed against her hair, she let go of all the pain, let it flow out of her as he held her tightly to him and let her cry.

Chapter 21

Scott stared into the darkness, listening to Allison’s quiet breathing. She’d cried herself to