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she still had a long way to go before she healed. But she took a deep breath and stood tall. She had no reason for regrets. And she had saved two people. She went through the doorway first, her lawyer and Malone behind her.

Hill was perched at her desk, her beady eyes fixed on Amanda. The LT didn’t smile, but her eyes brightened. “Close the door, Detective.”

“I’ve got it.” Malone stepped in and did as Hill had requested of Amanda.

Hill got up, rounded her desk, and said to Amanda, “Please, sit.”

Amanda recognized the LT’s intended power play immediately. With her sitting and the lieutenant standing, it was an intimidation tactic. Sadly, it was working.

“I’m not the type to mince words, Detective Steele, and I’m quite sure you know why I’ve called for this meeting.”

Amanda didn’t say a word. On previous advice from her lawyer, she was to limit her responses to “yes” or “no.”

“Do you know why I called this meeting?” Hill leaned against the edge of her desk, sitting but still above Amanda.

“No.”

“Not sure I buy that.”

Amanda shrugged, kept silent.

“I see how this is going to go.” She stood again. “Did you request backup to accompany you to the Logmill Road property?”

“No.” She balled her hand tight but released it before it rigored in a fist.

“Did you enter the property anyway?”

“Yes.” She stared straight ahead.

“Did you put the lives of yourself and others in jeopardy?”

“Yes.”

“Including that of your own partner?”

She hadn’t directly but things could have taken a dark turn. For that she had to answer, “Yes.”

Her lawyer gently nudged her arm, but Amanda didn’t look at her.

“Did you enter the barn while it was on fire?”

“Yes.”

“Did you convince your partner to join you?”

She stumbled with that one too. Self-imposed guilt was a bitch. She certainly hadn’t made him go along with her, but she hadn’t discouraged him either. The only right call she made was telling him to stay out of the barn.

“If you’re worried that I will hold him accountable for your poor leadership, I won’t. I’ll ask again—”

“No.” One word, two letters, and she felt like she betrayed Trent.

Hill’s lips rose in a subtle smile. “Did you ignore a call from your supervisor, Sergeant Malone, when he called for your whereabouts?”

Amanda’s lawyer touched her forearm. “Don’t answer that.” She turned to Hill. “There’s no way she could read his mind to know the reason for his call.”

Hill steepled her fingers. “Right. Because she ignored it. Is that right, Detective Steele? Did you ignore a call from Sergeant Malone when you were on the Ross property?”

“Yes.”

Hill smiled and dipped her head at the lawyer, then met Amanda’s gaze. “I believe I’ve allowed you a long leash, Detective.”

A ball of rage knotted in Amanda’s gut, but she clamped her mouth shut.

“You’ve wasted department time and taxpayers’ money on the interrogation of a suspect, a Samuel Booth, who turned out to be absolutely innocent.”

“Is there a question in there?” Amanda’s lawyer asked.

Hill quirked an eyebrow and addressed Amanda again. “And while you had Mr. Booth in custody, did you miss following vital clues that led to the death of two more women?”

Another one she struggled with. Her conscience would find her guilty, but there was no way to be certain. “No. We followed the evidence we had at the—”

Her lawyer urged her to stop talking.

Hill looked over the room. “I really think we’ve all heard enough. I’m suspending you without pay for thirty days and will be asking for your badge to be taken away for good.”

Amanda met Malone’s gaze. He pressed his lips down, but otherwise tried to infuse encouragement into his eyes. He’d told her before he had her back, and she believed it, but right now, she was floating in the ocean without a life raft. If she was going to survive, she’d have to swim. She cleared her throat. “What about Trent?”

“That’s really between me, Detective Stenson, his lawyer, and his sergeant, but I’m going to request that he be relegated to desk duties for thirty days.”

“I thought you said he wouldn’t be in trouble,” Amanda burst out, and her lawyer set a hand on her forearm.

“I said I wouldn’t hold him accountable for your actions. He could have refused to go with you, and he could have called for backup long before he did. He chose not to.”

“He didn’t because of me. I’m the senior detective.”

The lawyer put a hand on Amanda’s arm again, applying more pressure this time, but Amanda had more to say.

“You do realize that if we didn’t move when we did, that girl would have been dead. And Logan.”

Hill’s smile was twisted. “You a fortune teller now? And how dare you defend your actions by claiming that you saved two people? Do you forget that one is in the morgue because of you? Another recovering in the hospital from a gunshot?”

Both of them were killers, but that didn’t seem to matter to Hill. Any outburst would be a waste of energy. Hill had made up her mind about Amanda a long time ago.

Amanda got to her feet, took her badge and cuffs from her pocket and put them on Hill’s desk.

She looked down at what had been her life since she was twenty-one years old. She could accept that part of her life may be over and move forward—or she could fight. She wasn’t one to succumb to bullying, and if the last six years had taught her anything, it was just how formidable she was and how she could overcome anything. This setback included. And no matter how much Hill hated her or fought against her, her opinion didn’t have a bearing on Amanda’s value as a person or as a cop. If only Daniel had realized that his self-worth wasn’t reliant on other people’s approval. He might have never killed anyone.

But Amanda saved lives. She worked for justice. That was in her blood.

This was just a blip on her journey. She’d be back, and when she rose, Hill

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