Plays 1: Weird Time Blues - Colin Peterson, George O'Sullivan (good story books to read txt) š
- Author: Colin Peterson, George O'Sullivan
Book online Ā«Plays 1: Weird Time Blues - Colin Peterson, George O'Sullivan (good story books to read txt) šĀ». Author Colin Peterson, George O'Sullivan
clits, dickshafts, where ever. I love it all. Iād laugh to go up someoneās widdler. Or a big fat nuno.
Coley: thatās a new word - whatās a nuno?
Moth: I think I can guess.
Mills: (to Colley; in his face.) Cunt.
Colley: So Iāve been told. I like cunt.
Mills: Youāre fucking so cheeky!
Moth: Did you order?
Tabby: Iām bored.
Moth: I know youāre falling asleep on me.
Tabby: Take me home.
Moth: Iām not going home.
Kascano: You okay baby?
Moth: Mills, you were going to ask me something - before you asked my name?
Mills: When?
Moth: A minute ago?
Mills: Oh, I canāt remember now, man. Feels like ages ago. Er.. I think it was about drugs. Do you know any good vendors?
Moth: Well, I know Toddyās good. He gets stuff regularly.
Colley: I can get better stuff than Toddy.
Mills: Iām starting to like you now - tell me?
Colley: Itās from Malden.
Moth: No way! Maldenās a source! I love this world.
Colley: Maldenās cool. You should dig Mal.
Kascano: itās been around the block.
Colley: Yeah, a lot of people have.
Tabby: Iām Tabby from the block!
Moth: I thought you were bored?
Tabby: Nope - you talkinā about drugs now, yeah? YEAH!
Colley: Yeah - Tabs loves her drugs, especially hybrid drugs. We really like our mixers! Donāt we Tabs!
Tabby does a girly giggle, while Kascano slides his hand down her top; he cops a feel. Mills looks wasted, staring into space.
Moth: I noticed. I can mix, if the price is right.
Colley: Sounds like a partyās forming!
Mills: I got work in two hours - where these fuckinā drinks?
Colley: They're cocktails.
Kascano: What they doing? The throwing-thing?
Colley: I dunno.
Moth: Throwing up more like. Those bar guys were hammering it.
Colley: It's cool; they let me try this cocktail for free. I was their test dummy! I didnāt mind! Yeah, shit, what was it called? Yeah, I done this cocktail called Puke, and it was-
Mills: (to Moth.) Your place big?
Colley: Well, it was well -
Moth: Huge.
Colley: Yeah?
Kascano: I BET YO' COCKāS HUGE!
Moth: Well, yeah. I can afford the works now. I bought my own cock - fuck hiring!
Tabby: Youāve got a big dick? Of course you have ! Youāre loaded!
Moth: Look, I donāt flash it about - Iām not really-
Kascano: I would - Iād wear it down the bar, Iād be whacking ladies with it, maybe a few blokes.
Moth: Itās very sensitive, too sensitive sometimes; but with enough lubrication you can-
The drinks arrive; a Waiter brings the drinks. Mills glares at the Waiter.
Mills: Yeah, ābout time. All these years pass and all the technology and all we get is table-phone, so we donāt need to go up to the bar. Itās easier to pay. we want a faster fuckinā service. The first robot that does youāre fucking job, Iām gonna tip it.
Waiter: Thanks sir.
The Waiter puppet is activated by Colley, looking high. Mills put his card into the phone at the time. It beeps.
Mills: Fuckers.
Kascano: Chill, man, chill.
Tabby: Letās get some drugs.
Colley: Iāll sort it and can meet you round Mothās in an hour or so?
Moth: Yeah, Iāll guard youāre cocktail;
Colley: Have it, mate. I owe you for the beer. See you later.
Colley exits.
Tabby: Shall we get a Shute to yours or do you want to get a perso-cab?
Moth: Weāll Shute it. The Shute is on my route, as itās eaier. Plus itās free.
Tabby: But you get everyone in peroscabs! I want to watch a movie! They do new releases - even movies specially made for persocabs!
Moth: Well, thatās great; but Iām not paying for that.
Kascano: The seats are comfortable.
Moth: I may be better off - but Iām not stupid. The shiteās automated and -
Kascano: Man, live a little. The Shuteās slow.
Moth: Well, canāt weā¦you know?
Tabby: No, fuck jabbering shite! I wanna get wasted and check out your gaff.
Mills: (throwing the powdered pint over him, and does a Batman vodka shot caplet.) I better go; Temple wants to see me.
Kascano: Iāll save you some.
Mills (taking his card out of the phone.) Iāll see you soon.
Kascano: You take care - the streets are rough.
Mills Fuck you; Templeāll be getting me stacking shelves.
Mills wipes his mouth with a napkin and exits, sucking a THC-lolly.
Moth: I couldāve made him a coffee at mine.
Kascano: Thatās cool; heās a playmo - heāll be fine. Nothing ever happens anyway.
Tabby: IāM GETTING BORED. beep-beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep, bloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooopies.
Moth: (calling to the waiter, at the bar.) Bar-dude! Can we a have another bottle of Chamwig to go?
Waiter: (Colley does his voice.) Yeah, itās on the house, Mister Moth. The manager wants to thank you for publicising this restaurant; people like to eat where rich people go and important-
Moth: I was just lucky-
Waiter: But you bring publicity, and word of mouth. Thanks on behalf of everyone here. This is for you! (Hands Moth a huge bottle of champagne; Waiter activates a control for canned bar applaud, as if he's won the World Cup.) Cheers.
Kascano: Now that has to be the same size as his cock!
Tabby laughs loudly, an annoying laugh, which could pierce any other sound. Everyone stops applauding and retches, coughs. we're drowned out by the sound.
Slip-sceneā¦Another 1.
A spacecraft. Mess hall; it is quiet, slightly smoky, but quite morose Terw and Refto are eating.
Terw: Look, Refto, youāre a prick right? But you know the deal? Weāll we āre going to be shocked., the end is nigh. You know that.
Refto: Look, Terw weāre fine! Weāre just cruising. Cruising in space. Weāre not lost. Weāre almost at that Colony Forty-Six. What can go wrong?
Terw: You shouldnātāve said that, cos you now know something will go wrong.
Refto: Fuck that shit; itās all good. the foods shit; the holo-deck is out of order. The ship is falling part.
Terw: Will you keep quiet; the other drones are listening.
Refto: I donāt trust Hagen either.
Terw: We have to if weāre to get out of here.
Refto: Iām staying; Iām doing a runner when we get to the colony.
Terw: Look, Iām coming with you, but I just want you to know: I think this ship is haunted. I was in the holo-deck, before it all fucked up and it was really freaking me out. Some programme just activated itself while I was creating my own film. The bastards must have done something.
Refto: You sure itās not the drugs?
Terw: Donāt blame the food. I canāt help it if things are getting funny.
Refto: Look, I think you should tell Hagen. What was the programme about?
Terw: This is going to sound funny, but it was about a couple who left earth and wanted to start a new life, but they were having problems conceiving. She had no womb and he had four sperm cells.
Refto: I see.
Terw: Well, she thought she had a daughter called Tinnie. But she then remembered that it was a doll she had when she was a kid. So the guy was all funny and all that.
Refto bursts out laughing, bleeding, dying again.
Terw: Man , it could be-
Refto: Itās a joke deck. Itās a programme that kicks in to scare the user. Kids do them all the time.
Terw: There are no kids.
Refto: Look, umm, I dunno your name, pea-brain; weāre friends, but try not to take this too seriously. Take some chemicals and gets some sleep. Iām going to search for Hagen, so I can fuck her. Hopefully, sheāll be masturbating again.
Terw: Give her a minute, sheās just got out of the shower!
Refto: I donāt want to fall out with you, but I will. I will compete with you, in the name of humanity, and youāll lose. I know you wonāt compete.
Terw: I wonāt com-
Refto: See. Watch your back and donāt trust Hagen. If you tell her about this sheāll tell Relton. Youāll be locked up - labelled unstable.
Terw: I know what I saw. It fucked me up a bit to be honest.
Refto: Well, thatās your problem, isnāt it?
Terw: Suppose.(Smiles.) I like problems, I use to be good at Sudoku.
Refto: If you see Hagen tell her to find me and Iāll fuck her. (Beat.) Sorry, mate, are you two an item?
Terw: I fuck her, but I think thatās as far as it goes - no soul-weavings, not that messy.
Refto: Oh. Right. Good. Just checking, you see. Didnāt want to fuck you off. Get it? Hey, weāre still mates arenāt we?
Terw: Yeah, of course. Mates forever.
Refto: Good. (Pause.) I better be going. I have to use the toilet. I will be around, if you want to get spaced. Get it? No, Iāll stop now. Iām trying to break the ice, again. Make us all jokey like before.
Terw: Well, yeah, I can see that. But it wonāt work. You know that donāt you?
Refto: I know.
Terw: But I want to keep it mutual - suck me off, or a wank comp? At least you were honest with me and didnāt back-stab me. Youāll always be my cum-muffin.
They shake hands and Terw kisses Refto, they hug. Hagen enters. She watches intrigued, and then laughs. Terw and Refto look embarrassed, but remain calm.
Terw: (to Hagen.) So what? We were hugging? Canāt a man hug his mates?
Hagen: Yeah, I liked it. I was just about toā¦You want to see what we have recovered though? Youāll never guess what.
Refto: An old satellite?
Terw: Fuck knows -just say it!
Hagen: Okay. Weāve found an old craft heading to Colony Forty-Six. The scan said no life forms, but when we opened it their were two in there. A man and a woman. They were sort of still alive. They are living, but really dead. Funny, right?
Terw: What in a deadlifey kind of way?
Hagen: No, this has nothing to do with science, itās serious. (Terw looks confused.) It was weird because they were androids, but they looked like humans.
Refto: Yes, I know: Iāve read this and seen the simulation in the holo-deck.
Hagen: No, you donāt understand. It was different. They had been eaten by something, as if they were human once and then turned slowly into living death machines. It
Coley: thatās a new word - whatās a nuno?
Moth: I think I can guess.
Mills: (to Colley; in his face.) Cunt.
Colley: So Iāve been told. I like cunt.
Mills: Youāre fucking so cheeky!
Moth: Did you order?
Tabby: Iām bored.
Moth: I know youāre falling asleep on me.
Tabby: Take me home.
Moth: Iām not going home.
Kascano: You okay baby?
Moth: Mills, you were going to ask me something - before you asked my name?
Mills: When?
Moth: A minute ago?
Mills: Oh, I canāt remember now, man. Feels like ages ago. Er.. I think it was about drugs. Do you know any good vendors?
Moth: Well, I know Toddyās good. He gets stuff regularly.
Colley: I can get better stuff than Toddy.
Mills: Iām starting to like you now - tell me?
Colley: Itās from Malden.
Moth: No way! Maldenās a source! I love this world.
Colley: Maldenās cool. You should dig Mal.
Kascano: itās been around the block.
Colley: Yeah, a lot of people have.
Tabby: Iām Tabby from the block!
Moth: I thought you were bored?
Tabby: Nope - you talkinā about drugs now, yeah? YEAH!
Colley: Yeah - Tabs loves her drugs, especially hybrid drugs. We really like our mixers! Donāt we Tabs!
Tabby does a girly giggle, while Kascano slides his hand down her top; he cops a feel. Mills looks wasted, staring into space.
Moth: I noticed. I can mix, if the price is right.
Colley: Sounds like a partyās forming!
Mills: I got work in two hours - where these fuckinā drinks?
Colley: They're cocktails.
Kascano: What they doing? The throwing-thing?
Colley: I dunno.
Moth: Throwing up more like. Those bar guys were hammering it.
Colley: It's cool; they let me try this cocktail for free. I was their test dummy! I didnāt mind! Yeah, shit, what was it called? Yeah, I done this cocktail called Puke, and it was-
Mills: (to Moth.) Your place big?
Colley: Well, it was well -
Moth: Huge.
Colley: Yeah?
Kascano: I BET YO' COCKāS HUGE!
Moth: Well, yeah. I can afford the works now. I bought my own cock - fuck hiring!
Tabby: Youāve got a big dick? Of course you have ! Youāre loaded!
Moth: Look, I donāt flash it about - Iām not really-
Kascano: I would - Iād wear it down the bar, Iād be whacking ladies with it, maybe a few blokes.
Moth: Itās very sensitive, too sensitive sometimes; but with enough lubrication you can-
The drinks arrive; a Waiter brings the drinks. Mills glares at the Waiter.
Mills: Yeah, ābout time. All these years pass and all the technology and all we get is table-phone, so we donāt need to go up to the bar. Itās easier to pay. we want a faster fuckinā service. The first robot that does youāre fucking job, Iām gonna tip it.
Waiter: Thanks sir.
The Waiter puppet is activated by Colley, looking high. Mills put his card into the phone at the time. It beeps.
Mills: Fuckers.
Kascano: Chill, man, chill.
Tabby: Letās get some drugs.
Colley: Iāll sort it and can meet you round Mothās in an hour or so?
Moth: Yeah, Iāll guard youāre cocktail;
Colley: Have it, mate. I owe you for the beer. See you later.
Colley exits.
Tabby: Shall we get a Shute to yours or do you want to get a perso-cab?
Moth: Weāll Shute it. The Shute is on my route, as itās eaier. Plus itās free.
Tabby: But you get everyone in peroscabs! I want to watch a movie! They do new releases - even movies specially made for persocabs!
Moth: Well, thatās great; but Iām not paying for that.
Kascano: The seats are comfortable.
Moth: I may be better off - but Iām not stupid. The shiteās automated and -
Kascano: Man, live a little. The Shuteās slow.
Moth: Well, canāt weā¦you know?
Tabby: No, fuck jabbering shite! I wanna get wasted and check out your gaff.
Mills: (throwing the powdered pint over him, and does a Batman vodka shot caplet.) I better go; Temple wants to see me.
Kascano: Iāll save you some.
Mills (taking his card out of the phone.) Iāll see you soon.
Kascano: You take care - the streets are rough.
Mills Fuck you; Templeāll be getting me stacking shelves.
Mills wipes his mouth with a napkin and exits, sucking a THC-lolly.
Moth: I couldāve made him a coffee at mine.
Kascano: Thatās cool; heās a playmo - heāll be fine. Nothing ever happens anyway.
Tabby: IāM GETTING BORED. beep-beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep, bloooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooopies.
Moth: (calling to the waiter, at the bar.) Bar-dude! Can we a have another bottle of Chamwig to go?
Waiter: (Colley does his voice.) Yeah, itās on the house, Mister Moth. The manager wants to thank you for publicising this restaurant; people like to eat where rich people go and important-
Moth: I was just lucky-
Waiter: But you bring publicity, and word of mouth. Thanks on behalf of everyone here. This is for you! (Hands Moth a huge bottle of champagne; Waiter activates a control for canned bar applaud, as if he's won the World Cup.) Cheers.
Kascano: Now that has to be the same size as his cock!
Tabby laughs loudly, an annoying laugh, which could pierce any other sound. Everyone stops applauding and retches, coughs. we're drowned out by the sound.
Slip-sceneā¦Another 1.
A spacecraft. Mess hall; it is quiet, slightly smoky, but quite morose Terw and Refto are eating.
Terw: Look, Refto, youāre a prick right? But you know the deal? Weāll we āre going to be shocked., the end is nigh. You know that.
Refto: Look, Terw weāre fine! Weāre just cruising. Cruising in space. Weāre not lost. Weāre almost at that Colony Forty-Six. What can go wrong?
Terw: You shouldnātāve said that, cos you now know something will go wrong.
Refto: Fuck that shit; itās all good. the foods shit; the holo-deck is out of order. The ship is falling part.
Terw: Will you keep quiet; the other drones are listening.
Refto: I donāt trust Hagen either.
Terw: We have to if weāre to get out of here.
Refto: Iām staying; Iām doing a runner when we get to the colony.
Terw: Look, Iām coming with you, but I just want you to know: I think this ship is haunted. I was in the holo-deck, before it all fucked up and it was really freaking me out. Some programme just activated itself while I was creating my own film. The bastards must have done something.
Refto: You sure itās not the drugs?
Terw: Donāt blame the food. I canāt help it if things are getting funny.
Refto: Look, I think you should tell Hagen. What was the programme about?
Terw: This is going to sound funny, but it was about a couple who left earth and wanted to start a new life, but they were having problems conceiving. She had no womb and he had four sperm cells.
Refto: I see.
Terw: Well, she thought she had a daughter called Tinnie. But she then remembered that it was a doll she had when she was a kid. So the guy was all funny and all that.
Refto bursts out laughing, bleeding, dying again.
Terw: Man , it could be-
Refto: Itās a joke deck. Itās a programme that kicks in to scare the user. Kids do them all the time.
Terw: There are no kids.
Refto: Look, umm, I dunno your name, pea-brain; weāre friends, but try not to take this too seriously. Take some chemicals and gets some sleep. Iām going to search for Hagen, so I can fuck her. Hopefully, sheāll be masturbating again.
Terw: Give her a minute, sheās just got out of the shower!
Refto: I donāt want to fall out with you, but I will. I will compete with you, in the name of humanity, and youāll lose. I know you wonāt compete.
Terw: I wonāt com-
Refto: See. Watch your back and donāt trust Hagen. If you tell her about this sheāll tell Relton. Youāll be locked up - labelled unstable.
Terw: I know what I saw. It fucked me up a bit to be honest.
Refto: Well, thatās your problem, isnāt it?
Terw: Suppose.(Smiles.) I like problems, I use to be good at Sudoku.
Refto: If you see Hagen tell her to find me and Iāll fuck her. (Beat.) Sorry, mate, are you two an item?
Terw: I fuck her, but I think thatās as far as it goes - no soul-weavings, not that messy.
Refto: Oh. Right. Good. Just checking, you see. Didnāt want to fuck you off. Get it? Hey, weāre still mates arenāt we?
Terw: Yeah, of course. Mates forever.
Refto: Good. (Pause.) I better be going. I have to use the toilet. I will be around, if you want to get spaced. Get it? No, Iāll stop now. Iām trying to break the ice, again. Make us all jokey like before.
Terw: Well, yeah, I can see that. But it wonāt work. You know that donāt you?
Refto: I know.
Terw: But I want to keep it mutual - suck me off, or a wank comp? At least you were honest with me and didnāt back-stab me. Youāll always be my cum-muffin.
They shake hands and Terw kisses Refto, they hug. Hagen enters. She watches intrigued, and then laughs. Terw and Refto look embarrassed, but remain calm.
Terw: (to Hagen.) So what? We were hugging? Canāt a man hug his mates?
Hagen: Yeah, I liked it. I was just about toā¦You want to see what we have recovered though? Youāll never guess what.
Refto: An old satellite?
Terw: Fuck knows -just say it!
Hagen: Okay. Weāve found an old craft heading to Colony Forty-Six. The scan said no life forms, but when we opened it their were two in there. A man and a woman. They were sort of still alive. They are living, but really dead. Funny, right?
Terw: What in a deadlifey kind of way?
Hagen: No, this has nothing to do with science, itās serious. (Terw looks confused.) It was weird because they were androids, but they looked like humans.
Refto: Yes, I know: Iāve read this and seen the simulation in the holo-deck.
Hagen: No, you donāt understand. It was different. They had been eaten by something, as if they were human once and then turned slowly into living death machines. It
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