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“Where done” she sounds relieved.
I nod and we watch it. She packs up the brownies and cupcakes were bringing into class and grab all her stuff.
“mkay see you in class tomorrow.” She opens the door and starts down my driveway.
I cant seem to be able to follow her.
So I watch her go.


2 weeks later. First of December.

“Okay class now all of you know it charismas month so in the spirit I created a project!” I groan.
Hey Maby you don’t have to work with someone else. I roll my eyes. Shut up.
So little Mrs. Im in love with Kyle reinfeild, what are we going to do with the project?
I tune in and look at mr.horrin.
“…now to assign partners.”
Not again. Oh my. This just gets better and better!
“As director of your film let me see, marina! Okay now your actors, mia and kyle. Perfect. And your song to direct to.hmmmn lets see this ones tricky.”
I let my head fall onto my folded arms. Shitshitshitshtisthisthistshitshtishitshitshtishitshithitsthisthisthi.
Will you look at how fate plays. Now your stuck with kyle. Again!
Cursing internally I wait untill everyone leaves before going up to mr.horrin.
All he does though is lecture me about learning to play with others and all that crap. Just because you’re a drama teacher doesn’t give you permission to get all jerky.
Rolling my eyes I walk outside to find Kyle and marina talking next to each other. Really closely.
“Marina” I say, ignoring the weird feeling of butterflies I get in my stomacke when I see him look at me.
“Let’s just go okay? I need to get home.” I say trying to avoid talking. I grab her skinny arm and drag her down the hallway.
“Omg Kyle is so hot!” she sequels and for a moment I think she talking to me. “What?”
And then I notice the pink phone held up against her ear. Of course.
Rolling my eyes I get in my car and wait for her to climb in. she shuts her phone and looks over to me.
“omg Kyle reinfeild is my new boy toy. Or at least going to be. Hmnnn.” She laughs and I drive to her house. “why can’t you go out with someone because you care about them not just because their hot?”
She laughs.
“oh come on marina. I want to date a nice boy. One with feelings and rather hug me than get me in his bed.” I look over to her and she laughs.
“alright and when you met this boy you tell me.”
“what! Marina! There are lots of nice boys out there.” I say fiddling with the heater.
We drive to her house and she opens the door. “No mia. There are rude boys pretending to be nice and then there are jerks that are nice but are scared to show it.” Her blue eyes look sad as she closes my door and walks up her driveway.

Laying on my bed that night I try to figure out what mia tried to say. No nice guys?


****


“you want me to what?” mia says. Were in marinas living room preparing the project for Mr.H.
“Seriously mia. Come on! Im the director so if I need you to start on my bed well your starting on my bed.” She rolls her eyes and pulls up towards her parents room. She pushes mia down on the bed and she sits with a humph.
She looks good.
I don’t know who did her makeup but she is wearing makeup and a tight red shirt with jeans and a pair of black heeled boots. Her lips red look kissable.
Very kissable.
Mia puts her on the edge of the bed with a book in her hand and directs me to the side of the bed next to her.
How the hell am I supposed to sing to her?
And then she starts.


I really can't stay. She closes the books and stands up

Baby, it's cold outside. I stand up and follow her to the window.

I've got to go away. She walks to the door.

Baby, it's cold outside. I follow her to the door.

. I can’t think. The music soundtrack plays our recorded voices over some sound system marina has but I can only focus on mia.
On the way she flirts while singing.
Mind if I move in closer?

At least I'm gonna say that I tried. She looks at me and giggles

What the sense of hurting my pride?

I really can't say

Baby, don't hold out

Babe but it's cold outside

She walks over to the fireplace and starts playing with the ornaments.


Gosh your lips look delicious. They really do.

My brother will be there at the door

Waves upon a tropical shore

My maiden aunt's mind is vicious

Ooh your lips are delicious

now I can’t stop looking at her lips. Her red full lips. Singing to me.


You've really been nice

I'm thrilled when you touch my hair

But don't you see

How can you do this thing to me?

I really can't stay

Get over that hold out

I sit down on the couch pulling her with me. her hand warm in mine.
Her green eyes look into mine intently.


Oh, baby, it's cold outside
Everything is going fine and then I blow it by kissing her.

Her lips are soft and fit right with mine.
“Cut!” marinas shrill voice cuts me off and she jumps up.
Walking as far away from me she goes to stand by marina.
She won’t even look at me.


*******


He kissed me. I avoid looking at him for the rest of the night. Marina tells us to leave after a while. She says she needed editing to do.
I saw her phone. Jeremy is coming over. The camera guys walk out talking about some pizza shop that just opened.
Rolling my eyes I grab my coat and start to walk outside. The snow was actually falling in small clumps. They kept sticking to me.
That’s when I hear the footsteps behind me. And then a car starts and slowly pulls up to me.
“Let me give you a ride home and explain everything to you.” I stare at him and he pouts.
“Please.” He says again.


She gets in the car and looks at me.
And then she kisses me.
I probably look shocked because she pulls away with a grimace.
“Oh my I’m so sorry I just. Oh god I don’t know what just happened.” She is hiding her face in her hands and is shaking her head.
I take a chance and touch her shoulder.
I start to drive and we end up at the park. “Uh you do know this isn’t where I live?” her voice is no longer muffled and I risk a glance in her direction to see that see pulled her hands away from her face and was frowning.
“I know” I cut the engine and get out walking towards the bench I sit down and look back at her still in the passenger seat and smile.
I pat the seat next to me.
I wait a couple seconds and she finally gets out of the car and walks over to me.
We didn’t talk but when I grab her hand and we saw a pair of swans swim into the small lake I looked over at her and kissed her softly.
Words were not needed.


*********


“How’s your mom?” He asks as I play with his hair. I shrug. “Better” it’s not like she’s going to get any better.
“So did the treatments go okay today?” his voice sounds sincere and I know he asks because he knows I’m worrying.
I push myself down and lie down on the bed. “How much better can cancer treatments get?” I snap. Not caring for the moment that he only meant well.
The silence is immense and then I feel the bed dip under his weight.
“I’m sorry I know it’s hard I was just trying to...”
“Understand, I know im sorry I snapped. Its just im so tired and I have a social studies test and then AP chemistry test to prepare for and im so “I stop and blow at my bangs.
He wraps his long and strong arms around me.
I felt safe.
“It’s okay she will be fine I promise.” He smiles as I rest my head on his shoulder. “You know you promise me a lot of things.” And he starts laughing and I then I start laughing.
His laugh is just so contagious.
Falling back onto the bed I kiss his tattoo on the back on his neck and laugh when his skin gets Goosebumps. Hauling my textbook back into my arms I flip it close and shove it into my book bag.
“I better go” I whisper. Knowing we both hate this part of the day.
When it starts getting dark out. The last sparkle of light shining through the trees.
Standing up I open up his window. Throwing my bag down waiting to hear the thump of the impact before climbing out. “Bye!”I jump down and look up at him. He stands his head poking out of his window. “Call me when you get home!” I nod and grab my bag. Running towards my street I run the block and turn onto my driveway. Opening my door the smell of disinfectant hits me hard and I gulp down tears. I go into the kitchen I grab an apple.
I can hear the soft footsteps tiptoeing around upstairs and the soft muted voices.
Not wanting to be heard I go outside and pull my scarf tighter against me.
The wind is harsh. Walking back towards the river passing by the woods. The leaves crunching loudly underneath my shoes.
Grabbing a rock I skip a pebble over the small creek before hopping across the steps towards the other side.
A couple more steps and I get to a big boulder shouldered up against a big tree with branches low enough to climb. Making it up a couple branches I sit down my back resting on the hard bark.
Closing my eyes I let my phone play my special playlist. The music filling my head.
Sighing I drop from the branch and head back home. Over the pebbles and past the wooded area into our small backyard.


4 months later


Going downstairs I grab a soda and flop on my couch.
The doorbell ringing waking me up from my nap. A couple seconds later I hear my friend’s voices.
“Dude you need a girlfriend. Sitting here on a Saturday night and nothing to do!” Jeremy sits on me and I push him off.
They don’t know about mia.
“I don’t need a girlfriend.” I say as I take a drink from my soda.
They start playing with my game system. “Dude you need a date for prom.” Sam says shoving chips into his mouth.
I look at him. Prom.. Will mia go with me? Does she still want this to be a secret? It’s already April. We’ve been dating since December.
“Dude! Stop daydreaming and come beat Sam!” Jeremy punches me in the shoulder.


****

I walk up the stairs to be Kyle stood waiting for me. I walk up and stand on the step below him and try not to start crying.
He opens his arms and folds
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