Another Life - JenniferNewman (best books to read in your 20s .txt) 📗

I wanted to feel something but no feeling came. I wanted something anything thing at all but nothing came. I closed my eyes and waited. Five minutes I waited. Five minutes. Nothing came.......
I gave up and pushed away from the sink and walked to the door that had at some point swung open and was now revealing an empty hall. An empty house. No life and way too many memories. No matter how much I wanted to keep these memories the thought was too bad. My feeling had gone replaced with want. A robotic feeling that I was now going to have to use to survive. Well aren’t I dramatic tonight.
I clambered back down the stairs with my face a little less red and blotchy then when I had escaped up them. My eyes felt like I was in a hurricane as the cold air rushed against them cooling them before I had to face Parker again. The hallway I had to walk down to reach the kitchen was going past to fast no matter how slow I choose to walk. The door was inevitable and no sooner had I thought this it was right in front of me haunting me. Okay that is ridicules a door haunting me? Come on rose you are least have that much common sense left right? I could feel little bits of feeling pouring back into my body as I took a deep breath and pushed open the door.
No sooner had I entered the room to find Parker standing in the same spot as where I had left him I was swept up into his arms after he had bounded over with two large strides. His arms were crushed around me as he pulled me to him. Again I started to not care a little bit that he was only hugging me for guilt that didn’t mean I felt nothing for him. I don’t think I had ever felt this way about anyone before. Again this scared me. They always so that girls like the boy more they the boy likes the girl right?
He put his hands on my shoulders and pulled me a little bit away from where I had been hiding against his chest to look at my face. His face was serious with no humour what so ever. This reminded me of the time in the work room when ever thing had still been okay. Apart from the little fact that I was being hunted down by Parker’s brother but right now not so much my greatest worry. It was just starting to dawn on me that I was only seventeen. Not a legal adult meaning I could not live on my own. What was going to happen now?
“Rose your getting that far off look again back to earth anytime now.” I heard Parker say in a shaky voice clearly wanting to say something but confused or something. I shook my head a little and then looked back up at him to show I was listening to what he had to say.
“Okay right Rose listen. I lo-“ he was cut short by the door bell where I quickly slide out of his arms and scampered to the door.
“Rose!” Sophie squealed as she hurled herself through the door and wrapped her arms round me.
“Hey to you to.” I gasped. As her hold tightened and my breathing started to come out in little gasps.
“Sorry! Right so what first. Hot chocolate or heavy chocolate cake and I swear if you give me crap about it being fattening I’ll shoot you!” I gave a ‘laugh’ when she finished although my laugh sounded little more than a croak that could only be distinguished by frogs of some sort.
I heard Parker’s footsteps coming up behind me and his arms coming around my middle pulling me to him.
“Like I was saying-“ once again he was cut short by the beginning of I'm not a robot by mariner and the diamonds: I don’t even remember changing my ring tone....
You're vulnerable, you're vulnerable

You are not a robot

You're loveable, so loveable

But you're just troubled


Guess what? I'm not a robot, a robot

Guess what? I'm not a robot, a robot
I jumped and Parker groaned letting go of me and stepping back to lean against the wall where he stayed with his hand over his face while I pulled my phone out of my pocket and pressed the answer button. Looking over at Parker who was not looking at me but anywhere but.
“Well okay. This is awkward I'm going to go make hot chocolate and take this cake out.....” Sophie indicated with her left hand that she would be leaving to go to the kitchen. Well great now my feeling decides it is going to make a reappearance great timing!
“Hello?” I sputtered into the phone. Turning to face Parker who was looking somewhere above my head. Okay.
“Rose! Oh shit man turn that music down! Rose? You still there?” I squeezed my eyes shut and followed Parker’s example and leaned against the wall as Brendon continued to yell at whoever it was who wouldn’t turn the music down.
“Fuck you two! I am trying to speak to Rose her mum has just died give some respect!” I heard him yell in the background muffled by something but still audible. I leaned more heavily against the wall still with my eyes closed.
“Roes? You still there?” finally Brendon’s’ voice came back on just before I was about to press the hang up button, why did he have to keep ringing me?
“Yeah.” My robot voice was back with vengeance. Well maybe that had been why I had changed my ring tone....
My eyes were still closed as I felt arms pulling me against Parker where I laid my head trying to forget the nagging feeling that had stayed with me ever since the dream. What if it was true? what if Parker did just feel guilty? I mean its’ not like he’s doing anything right now to prove me wrong..... How many what ifs did I now have in my life? The answer is way too many.
“Rose I'm so sorry. To hear about your mum and all. I mean so soon after your dad......” Waitago Brendon with being subtle..... I must have crown up my face and shown some expression I was not aware of because Parker took the phone right out of my hand and press the screen to hang up. Leaving Brendon’s reason for ringing a mystery I really did not care about right now. I leaned against Parker’s chest as his arms once again curled around me rocking me softly.
“Rose-oops sorry!” Sophie came running up the hall then stopped dead when she saw me in Parker’s arms with an apologetic smile on her face. This was the way Sophie acted when she had no control over the situation in hand. She would go all apologetic and hyper jumping about like crazy trying to get everything done and then when that’s done find more things to do. Now she was backing back into the kitchen with the same apologetic smile I had seen so many time when she had come round after my dad’s death and comforted me. That had been back when I had had no idea the danger that would follow. Wow Waitago me! Well sarcasm wouldn’t help me now.... Much...
After Sophie had retreated back into the kitchen given me another apologetic look while closing the door I looked up at Parker who had buried his face in my hair only to look up now that my hair was gone.
“What was it you wanted to say?” I inquired looking at a spot just over his shoulder.
“Oh right.... I’ll tell you when I get back. Your okay with me going right. Your got my cell if you need to call.” His voice was distant as I untangled myself from his arms and leaned once again against the wall and looked up at him with his slightly too concentrated expression as he kissed me on the forehead and picked up his jacket from the hock on the side of the wall and opened the door while still holding my hand. Only letting go when he was half way out and finally looking me in the eye. He bent over to give me a quick kiss on the lips before exiting the door completely and closing it behind him. I pushed myself off the wall nearest to the door and made my way towards the kitchen where I could hear Sophie clattering about busying herself with mundane things.
I pushed the kitchen door open and found sure enough Sophie running round like a tornado getting plates and putting them on the table while the microwave started to ‘beep’ telling the house that it had done its job of heating up its contents in this case milk for the hot chocolate.
“Here I’ll get it.” I assured walking over to the microwave just as Sophie did the same thing while carrying two plates in her over hand.
“No it’s okay you go sit!” like I said hyper mode......
I went and perched on the edge of one of the chairs I would have before called comfy now they just felt like rock hard wood covered by a fin amount of fabric. To think about it that is pretty much all any of these things were. All the things my mum had worked to keep clean and neat were pointless. All the money her and dad had had to work for to just be spent of something that looked good. Pointless.....
Well I could be more dramatic dire drama queen if I liked but really? Not in the mood. I could say things like: my life is so over! Why me why why me!?! Or even something like: why was Parker being such an ass? Or was he? And poor poor me my family is dead! Yes I am going crazy! Please help me!
I shook my head and started rubbing my temple trying to shake the confused mess that was my brain back into some type of order. I wish myself luck!
“You look really tired.” Sophie pointed out when I looked up. She was finally standing still with two plates full of delicious chocolate cake and a cup of hot steamy chocolate already on the table. Sophie had replaced her apologetic face for one of concern which I simple dismissed with a roll of my eyes. Though to tell you the truth I started to feel tired just as she said it. Making my eye lids drop just that little bit more....
I leaned against the table and started picking at the cake she had just laid in front of me. I stared at the brown sponge with its oozing chocolate filling. On any other day I would have jumped for joy at the thought of not caring about the calories in this cake and to have jus scoffed the lot without a second glance. Now the thought of eating repelled me. Not because I wasn’t hungry but because I couldn’t think about actually putting that food into my mouth and chewing.... well here I go with the poor poor me again. Stop being such a stupid wimpy girl and do what your parents have wanted you to do. That would be.......
I heard the sound of a chair being pulled back over the tiled floor making a loud scraping noise as it collided once again with the hard surface. I heard the soft puff as Sophie sat down on its ‘cushioned’ surface of the chair and pick