Brain on Porn (Social #2) - DeYtH Banger (a book to read TXT) 📗

if this was the first time she went cold.

 

One reason guys do this is to avoid appearing needy and desperate. But as I’ve said before, neediness comes down to your mindset. If you genuinely want to connect with this girl and are pulling away to manipulate her approval of you — you’re being needy.

Another reason is that guys feel they put enough in effort and now it’s the girl’s turn to respond. I wish the world worked like that. Some women will reinitiate contact but many more, even ones that are interested, won’t. If this is just the first time she’s stopped responding, there’s no point in playing the waiting game and potentially missing your window of opportunity.

Hit her up within a few days and follow the ideas below for your message.

3. Don’t ask if she got your last text or talk about the same thing

I know you might feel lost when reinitiating with a girl who went quiet. Your natural inclination may be to double check if she received your message or repeat the same topic.

 

For example, perhaps she went silent after you asked her what she’s doing on Thursday. You write something like…

“I guess sitting at home and not talking to anyone then =P” [Making fun of her not answering]

“So what did you end up doing Thursday?” [Asking her after the fact]

“Not sure if you got my last message but I was wondering what your plans were for Thursday?” [Double checking]

These rarely ever work. Even when you think you’re being sarcastic about her lack of reply, you’re coming off as passive-aggressive and bitter.

This girl stopped responding after your last message FOR A REASON. Pushing her to reply to that specific idea or checking on her like you’re her dad isn’t exciting. It also makes it feel like you’re hung up on why she didn’t respond.

4. Don’t immediately invite her out again

You also don’t want to invite her out as your first message back to her. This is especially true if your previous unanswered text was about trying to setup plans.

 

She may have not been comfortable enough or excited enough yet to commit to a date. You pushing again without addressing those feelings (through positive emotion, see below) will often yield another silent response or no commitment.

It’s better to start with a more casual and engaging message, have a few texts back and forth, and then invite her out when she’s expressing positive emotions. Because if she went radio silent after your first invitation, you have to make the second one count.

Women can feel awkward about telling a guy off twice. They know you’re probably feeling rejected and frustrated which makes them feel uncomfortable. In turn, they can pull back to avoid confrontation or convince themselves it wasn’t meant to be. Then they go back to ignoring you or tell you sorry, but they’re not interested.

 

So why blow your chances by rushing it? Sending a couple more playful messages will shift the vibe and make her feel more secure about your connection. Here’s how you should be getting back into conversation:

5. Get the positive emotions flowing and THEN invite her out

As I said earlier, women stop responding for many reasons. But it usually comes down to that they’re not excited, invested, or comfortable enough to meet up with you (basically a stranger) yet.

A lot of guys think the remedy is to talk about commonalities and get to know each other on a deeper level. But women don’t want that over text — it’s a horrible means for communication. She can do that on a date with you.

All she really needs is to FEEL that it’s going to be a fun, awesome experience meeting up with you.

If you just start up the conversation with something bland, logical, or devoid of emotion — it’s not likely to go anywhere. This is why messages like, “Hey, how’ve you been?”, “So did you do well on the test?” fall flat. They don’t encourage her to open up and feel something more.

 

You want her to experience positive emotions such as enthusiasm, curiosity, playfulness, passion, and get her laughing her ass off when she reads your texts. There are countless ways to do this:

Use more descriptive or emotional language even when talking about normal things. Make everyday conversation more intriguing. Use words that paint a picture or evoke powerful responses. “Btw, the new X album blew my mind, I think I just had an audiogasm.” vs “Btw, that new X album is good.” “I just shook my ass like Shakira at salsa. Getting into anything exciting yourself?” vs “I just got back from salsa class. What are you doing tonight?” Add a funny GIF using iMessage/Whatsapp to enhance your message. So for example on the salsa message, you could then include a GIF of a cat shaking its body awkwardly. Share something interesting about yourself. This could be a situation that happened to you, an adventure you had, or an idea/subject you’re passionate about. Send a photo of you hiking at a beautiful lake, at a concert, or in your new suit. You can attach a quick note to it like, “I’m coming for you Daniel Craig.” “I just spent the last 15 minutes wondering what my dog was trying to tell me. I can’t be the only one, right?” “Yeaaaah, finally got my SCUBA certification. Feel free to picture me in my wetsuit.” Ask a relevant question to her life, something you’re genuinely curious about, or just something random/silly. When someone asks a great questionabout a topic we’re passionate about, we love to talk about it. And fun or thought-provoking questions surprise and excite us to continue the dynamic conversation. “So what inspired your bohemian-chic style? A memorable trip?” “You said you love to sketch — can you draw me like one of your French girls?” “What’s your most useless superhero power?”

 

If you haven’t noticed, there’s a theme here. All these messages are concise (1-2 sentences max), lighthearted, and often contain a joke.

Humor is the quickest way to re-engage a girl and get her hooked every time she reads your messages. And if she feels great chatting with you over text, she won’t be able to wait to meet up with you in-person.

Don’t wait long to make your move though. Once she’s responding back a couple times positively, strike when the iron is hot and invite her out.

These 5 steps will give you the best chance of bringing back a dead conversation. But if you’ve tried all the above more than once and she still hasn’t responded — it’s time to focus on someone else whose more excited to connect with you.

 

 

 

What To Do If She Doesn’t Text Back

 

 

 

Some girls are, and always will be hard to get. Even if they are not the most attractive girl in the room, they are still very high status and good at playing the game. These are my favorite girls.

The ones that are hardest to get are the ones that are most rewarding when you finally do get them. These are the girls who take forever to respond to your texts, change plans on you several times, stop answering your texts, and even stop talking to you for weeks at a time. Just know you are not alone. They do this to everyone, and most guys don’t know how to handle them . . . But I do!

First you must recognize that she may in fact be very busy and have a lot on her plate at the time; i.e. she may be working a ton of hours more at work, she may be getting over her boyfriend whom she recently broke up with, she may be feeling awful lately with some kind of illness, it may be her time of month were she is just moody and doesn’t want to talk to you.

Just like there are days where you don’t feel like going out, and hanging out with girls, there are certainly many days where she feels the same. And it’s just easier for her to not answer your text or your Facebook message, than to explain that she doesn’t feel like talking to guys that day. So don’t get too upset when she doesn’t immediately reply, or if she never replies for that matter. You have to realize that not every girl is going to like you.

The following three strategies are the perfect guide for getting women to respond when all hope is lost. They’re the best-known techniques for dealing with the conundrum of what to do if she doesn’t text back!

 

Strategy 1

 

 

Something to try though that has historically worked pretty well for reeling her back in if she doesn’t reply back to a text message is to make a joke out of it. I got this from a close friend of mine who was very clever with his text game. If a girl didn’t answer him, and he was texting herabout some plans or asking her a question, after about an hour or so, after he knew she saw it and was just ignoring it, he would say something as simple as “K sounds good lol”. This, or something like “Alright hun that sounds awesome lol”. A simple text like that, calls her out in a funny way, and shows that it’s not really a big deal to you that she didn’t answer, but that it’s more amusing to you. A lot of the time, a girl will see this, and laugh. And she will usually text back, and either apologize for not texting, or laugh and answer the question from earlier. It’s very simple, but effective.

 

Strategy 2

 

 

 

Another thing that works well, if a girl either stops answering texts, or is taking forever and you don’t know if she is going to reply back, is to call her! That’s right, like the old days, before anyone ever knew what a text message was; use the call feature!

Summon your deep inner, manly voice, and call her up!

Two things can either happen. She can either pick up the phone, which would obviously solve your problem (though not really that likely), or more probably, you will get her voicemail, and you will leave her a cool message. This is very important, you must leave her a fun, exciting, and powerful voicemail, not some lame, weak-hearted voicemail about why she is not answering you. Say something like “What’s up kiddo! I was just driving so I couldn’t text…but yeah, I just saw the funniest thing ever that reminded me of you. Let me know when get this; you’re going to laugh your ass off, later!” Now this of course, is not applicable to every scenario, but you get the message. Something that engages her, something that could be funny if done correctly, and something that is not needy.

 

Strategy 3

 

 

The final thing, and usually the last resort, depending on if you use it before the voicemail technique or not, is to challenge her to hang out with you. This is done via text. And this is done usually after she has flaked on you, or if you just haven’t been able to get together for one reason or another after trying for some time. What you do is send a re-initiating text message like “Sup sweetheart…Are you gonna’ hang out this week or are you gonna keep being a dink”. Now, before you laugh, this is actually more intricate than meets the eye. It does a few things all at once.

For one, it obviously calls her out on not being able to hang out with you yet. For two, it most likely offends her in a comical, teasing way, and shows her that you’re not afraid to say something like this to her. But thirdly, and most importantly, it challenges her and almost dares her to reply back to prove to you that she’s not a “dink,” or whatever inflammatory synonym you can replace this with; like a stiff, a square, a loser, a bum – personally I like to use the word “dink” because it’s the funniest to me.

 

 

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