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We all need to vent at some point, so do it positively. Slipping back into harmful habits when times get tough is only going to make things tougher. Everybody does it and they’re fine. It’s a natural release.
Maybe other people watch porn and live well… but can you? If you’re reading this and you’re enlisted in the Fortify Program, odds are you can’t. Don’t compare yourself to other people. This is your life and your recovery. You know that there’s nothing healthy about your urges to watch porn and using this justification will throw you back into the endless addiction cycle. I’m already screwed up, why stop now?
Remember: YOU ARE NOT YOUR ADDICTION. This is one of the most important things you need to remind yourself, day in and day out. You’re not a bad person because you struggle with this, you’re a great person because you’re doing something to change for the better. I had a setback so I might as well take advantage of it and binge.
This one is a huge culprit for turning a moment of weakness into a massive setback in your recovery. Learning to dust yourself off and turn things around quickly is an immensely important skill for Fortifiers. Remember that setbacks are a part of recovery and that they are motivation to press on, not permission to dig yourself deeper. I need it to fall asleep. Addiction can build seemingly normal routines into our lives that can be really hard to break. Sometimes our triggers are based on a time of day, a location, or even something as simple as a sound. It might sound crazy but there are things in our lives that inadvertently become related to our addiction. These types of triggers are powerful and can easily turn into part of our daily routines. Recognize the difference between a normal, healthy routine and one that your addiction has created.

 

 

I can’t stop making excuses.
Look around at your life to find the excuses you are using. Make a list and keep it with you. When one of these rationalizations creeps into your thoughts, you will be able to recognize and dismiss it. And remember, thinking of these things doesn’t make you perverted or bad. In fact, as we start to sift through thoughts and rely on the ones that support our recovery, we will find more trust and confidence in ourselves.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Chapter 2.1 - Insight

 "Dysfunctional stress circuits,[114] which can make even minor stress lead to cravings and relapse because they activate powerful sensitised pathways. 
To sum up, if these neuroplastic changes could speak, desensitisation would be moaning, ‘I can't get no satisfaction’.  At the same time, sensitisation would be poking you in the ribs saying, ‘hey, I’ve got just what you need’, which happens to be the very thing that caused the desensitisation. Hypofrontality would be shrugging and sighing, ‘bad idea, but I can't stop you’. Dysfunctional stress circuits would be screaming, ‘I NEED something NOW to take the edge off!"

"A forthcoming series of studies by Cambridge University addiction neuroscience experts isolated actual internet porn addicts and examined their brains.[93] The first of the series has been published, and the lead researcher said: 
There are clear differences in brain activity between patients who have compulsive sexual behaviour and healthy volunteers. These differences mirror those of drug addicts’[94] … I think [ours is] a study that can help people understand that this is a real pathology, this is a real disorder, so people will not dismiss compulsive sexual behaviour as something moralistic. ... This is not different from how pathologic gambling
and substance addiction were viewed several years ago.[95] 
The Cambridge team discovered that, in addicts, the reward centre (nucleus accumbens) showed hyper-reactivity to porn cues (hardcore video clips). This is evidence of sensitisation, explained more fully below, which powers cravings in addicts. Incidentally, women porn users also recorded increased cue-reactivity (as compared with controls) in a recent German study.[96]
 
In contrast, when the Max Planck team (above) looked at non-addicted porn users' brains they found less activation of another region of the reward circuit. This is evidence of desensitisation, or a numbed responsiveness.
In analysing the Max Planck results, the Cambridge team hypothesised that the brain responses to porn might differ between non-addicts and addicts."


"In short, perhaps the video clips were proper cues for today's users of streaming HD hardcore porn while brief stills were a closer representation of everyday erotic visuals. 
In any case, both hyper-reactivity to addiction cues (hardcore video) and reduced sexual responsiveness to tamer sexual visuals are not surprising in porn overconsumers. Both cue-reactivity and a reduced pleasure response are often seen in addicts of all kinds."


"No doubt more brain studies on porn addicts are on the way, but already addiction specialists maintain that all addiction is one condition. It doesn't matter whether it entails sexual behaviour, gambling, alcohol, nicotine, heroin or crystal meth – many of which addiction neuroscientists have studied for decades. Hundreds of brain studies on behavioural and substance addiction confirm that all addictions modify the same fundamental brain mechanisms[98] and produce a recognized set of anatomical and chemical alterations.[99] (More on these in a moment."


"QUESTION: This new definition of addiction refers to addiction involving gambling, food, and sexual behaviours. Does ASAM really believe that food and sex are addicting? 
ANSWER: The new ASAM definition makes a departure from equating addiction with just substance dependence, by describing how addiction is also related to behaviours that are rewarding. ... This definition says that addiction is about functioning and brain circuitry and how the structure and function of the brains of persons with addiction differ from the structure and function of the brains of persons who do not have addiction. ... Food and sexual behaviours and gambling behaviours can be associated with


the ‘pathological pursuit of rewards’ described in this new definition of addiction."

 

 

Via Brain on Porn by Garry Wilson

Chapter 3 - Let's Face It (Part1)

How Not Watching Porn Will Also Make You Live Longer

 

 

Jane McGonigal is a game designer. She has spent her life studying what makes games good, interesting and even healthy. Through this research and some very traumatic life experience of her own, she has discovered some very simple principles that can help you live happier and longer.

 

 

The best part? She made it all into a game.

 

 

The Game Of Life

 

McGonigal talks about the four ways we can improve our health and our lives: physically, emotionally, mentally, and socially. She calls them resistances, meaning if we are strong in each of these categories we will be resilient and be able to handle whatever life throws our way. In the Fortify Program, we refer to these things most commonly as connections.

An addiction focuses all of our energy on one unhealthy outlet, ignoring all others. We begin to connect with only one thing, which causes other important connections in our lives to dissolve. The most basic way to explaining recovery from addiction is not about abstinence but about rebuilding connections to the big beautiful world around us. This is the nature of the game Jane McGonigal describes, and really it is the point of the game of life. To live and be happy and connect.

Powering Up

Fortifiers often begin to do this naturally but McGonigal’s analogy is perfect for implementing Battle Strategies into your recovery. She introduces a point system in her app, SuperBetter, that is a simple way to try to build positive and healthy connections every day.

Think of it like your life stats. Go for a jog? +1 physical connection. Call your grandma you haven’t talked to in a while? +1 social connection.

 

If you incorporate one activity for each of these categories into your daily routine, you will be well on your way to solid recovery—and you’ll actually have fun along the way. This is important because it builds variety in your life. Like we said earlier, addiction is when you become unhealthily focused on one unhealthy thing. You need to build all the positive aspects of your life to create an atmosphere of genuine recovery. Building longer and longer streaks of daily victories over your addiction will replace your addiction with a positive, joyful life.

 

 

 

 

The 4 Types of People You Need To Tell About Your Porn Addiction

 

 

 

 

Anyone who has tried to quit watching porn probably knows that it is a lot harder to do alone. This is because pornography feeds off of our isolation and makes it harder to get help. Even though it’s hard, involving important people in our journey to recovery is a huge step for almost every Fortifier.

But those pesky questions still remain: who exactly should I talk to? Should I tell all of them, or just a couple? What if they don’t understand or judge me? And more than that, how do we get around the guilt, shame and embarrassment I feel about my addiction?

No two people struggling with a porn addiction will have the same answers when dealing with these questions. But there are people who can help you navigate them. The following list details the different categories of people in your life whom you need to talk to about your struggle. A lot of these categories will overlap, but that’s ok. There is no real limit to who you should tell, as long as it’s going to help. Confiding in someone about your journey to recovery is a personal choice that you should consider carefully, but it doesn’t have to be a huge deal. Because let’s be honest, most of us could use all the help we can get.

 

The People Who Take Care Of You

 

This could mean something very different for a lot of people but it is a good place to start. Confide in the people who you respect, look up to, and have qualities you want to develop in yourself. For many of us this is a parent, spouse, or other older relative. But for others, your main caretaker could exist outside your family. Often people will talk to school counselors or religious leaders when needing advice and guidance. Whatever your situation, the key here is to seek out someone who you know has your best interest at heart and is capable of investing in your recovery.

 

The People You Love

 

The people in this category also fall into the category above but this one could be a little different for some. Regardless of whether your relationship is romantic or platonic, these relationships are the ones entirely based upon honesty and communication. Opening up to the people you are closest to gives you a chance to grow together through vulnerability. Being completely open and

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