Whatever Happened To My Rock n Roll - Hestrin Zantya (simple e reader .TXT) 📗

ME

My name is Alexandra Guinn, I am eighteen years old, I live with my dad Jack Guinn and my brother Jimmie Guinn, and he is nineteen. Two months ago my parents had a divorce and my dad took me and my brother here. We live in Dallas now, we used to live in Pennsylvania for years but everything is different now that's why this is the best place for us today. My mom left my dad for another guy, she was not happy that's what I heard from my dad when he told me and my brother about the divorce. Me and my brother were not happy when we knew that our parents got divorce, but we both knew that mom was not loving us, maybe she thought we're not loving her either. We had lots of bad situations at home; she said that she would never be happy if she stayed with us for forever. She lives in Vegas, she has a better life and an ugly husband now. That guy was a music producer, I knew him well because he had promoted my album. It was so stupid when I finally busted him and mom had sex in my room. That day I came home early, I went to my room and found two of brainless adults were making out on my bed. It was so horrible and pathetic, because one of them was a woman that has given a birth for me and my brother. He came to my house to meet me that's what he said when I shouted at them frantically. I was afraid of that disgusting thing that happened in front of me, I saw my mom was a half naked and tried so hard to cover her body with my bed sheet. So I decided to cut my band out of his recording company and walked away from home for a couple of months. My dad got a shocked when I told him about that tragedy, and my brother was blaming me. I know it's so fucked up, but I can't take the blame because I don't deserve it. I know that mom slept with a guy who I knew well, but I didn't ask him to sleep with her. My dad is a dentist and I love him so much, me and my brother could never get along, since that pathetic tragedy we don't talk much anymore. He still thinks that I am the main reason for all the bad things that we have now. I mean he is seriously thinking that it all happened because of me. I really have a bunch of problems in my life, I lost my mom although I never really expected her to be a mother, I lost my brother, I lost my band, I lost my friends, I lost my dreams, I lost my career and I lost my life in Pennsylvania. 

One of my dad's friend has offered him a new job here, dad was so happy when he knew that he could try to start his new career and life with me and my brother here. In the meantime, I try so hard to feel happy because I have to start my life here. My brother Jimmie had a serious problem with drugs, and my dad sent him to hospital and he stayed in the rehab place for a year. He is recovered and just got home yesterday; it surprised me that last night he called my name again. My brother used to play good music, he had a band in high school and he played drums. He was a bad student, playboy, alcoholic and addicted in drugs. He had a dream to be a famous drummer but he left his music's life right after our parents got divorce. He lost his spirit in rock n roll, so did I. It's hard for me to forget about all the things that I wanted before, I used to play with my band, did all the gigs that we had, wrote all the good songs, played my guitar and dreamed about a wide world tour with my band, but it's all over when I saw him with her on my bed. I could not believe it at all, he was a guy whom I talked with about my goals in life, he used to be my friend, he has supported me and my band to record all the songs but then he took advantage of me and betrayed me. My band mates were so mad at me when I told them that it's over. They could not choose me, they kept it up and just let me go, I could not believe that I even called them friends, but I learned a good thing from it that we couldn't really trust somebody because most of people are jerks and idiots and I could never take a shit from them

I went to my brother's room last night, I asked him about things that he would do at college and why did he finally call my name again. He just laughed at me and told me that everything would be fine, he apologized and said that everything would be just fine. I told him that things were already bad and I didn't think college would be a fun place for me. I told him that I really hate Dallas and I couldn't stop it, I could not try to manage myself and live a new life here. He stared my face and told me that actually he felt the same thing, but he realized that things would just be bad if we didn't make it good. I knew that he's right; I thought we could do it together. 

. 

I took shower, I wore a purple t-shirt with HELL ASS DALLAS words printed on it in red color, I wore my knee-hole jeans, I wore my purple converse, I wore my black leather jacket and black rubber bangles on my wrist, my satchel bag and colored my nails with red, purple, black, green, yellow, pink, white, orange, blue, silver, and gold nail polish. I let my medium black hair down, it looked messy all the time so I did not want to comb it anymore. I went to my brother's room to check on him and I could not believe my eyes, I saw a geek with stupid glasses and hideous clothes, well he wore a pair of silly shoes too. I did not know if he was my brother if he didn't say my name correctly, I used to think he was a stalker who tried to steal a book from my dad's reading room. He shocked me with all his new appearance, I asked him about it but he just said that he dressed like normal people and he asked me not to give a damn about it. I wondered how he could lose his mind. What the hell was he thinking about it, what happened to my brother? I felt so bad and kept thinking that he's a real idiot. That was our first day at college and I could tell it would be the most ridiculous moment in my life, I hated it and that's it. 

 The first time I arrived there, I felt so awkward and inconvenience. I saw lots of people there, with different faces, behaviors, styles and enthusiasm. I felt like an idiot and unaccepted here, well then I realized why that kind of think could happen, it's because I thought Dallas sucks and so is everyone here. I saw my nerdy brother was standing behind me; he looked like a joke and confused. When we're in our high school nobody could ignore him, because he was popular and had a bad reputation. I really liked him and his personality but i knew that he would ruin his life with drugs and alcohol, I thought he would never stop his old habit but then he has changed everything in his life, I did not even know weather it's good or bad for him, one thing that I knew that he's my brother and apart from that I would just let he live his life with something that he really wanted. 

I walked to my class, my brother went to his class because he could make friends easily, he's a bit nicer than me, I mean he could say hi to strangers if he really needed them, he could smile to people and talk to them, that's why he had many girlfriends back then. I am not really talking, smiling, not even greeting somebody unless they're worth it. I am a cold hearted person, I didn't have many friends, I didn't care about school. I think school is just a place where you can study about nonsense, my dad would gladly do anything for me, if I ever made good grades in math because he's a math freak, he could spend all night long for calculus. I know that he never agrees with my interest in music, he always thinks that I can not make good money with a guitar, that's why I never talk to him a lot. 

She was there with her friends, three barbies were standing in front of me, one of them wore stupid pink American tighs and the other ones just dressed like whores. The taller one came to me with her stupid smile and bent herself down so she could say something right in front of my face, lucky me that she had no smelly breath. "Are you a new student here?" she said. I couldn't believe she would ask me something stupid like that, "yeah, what's your problem?" I replied to her and felt like throwing her away out of the window from the second floor. She was upset with the things that I said she called her stupid friends and they were starting at my face fiercely. One of them, the blonde one came closer to me and touched my shoulder with her short and chubby finger and said "We own this school with our power, so you better get a cope and lose yourself here! Get somebody to lean on, but you know that people here are not as friendly as we are." she laughed at me. I couldn't let her ruining my day so I put my hand around her neck and told her something like this "fuck you fucking fuck! who the hell you think you are?! Just stay away from me and you'll be saved! Now get lose! Go fuck yourself!" I shouted. 

I entered my classroom and everybody were staring at me, I knew that they could read the words on my t-shirt so I did not give a damn about it. They're just a group of local students and I would show them that I am not happy to live my life in their beloved homeland. I picked an empty table on the back row so I could have time to sleep and play some of