The Adventures of Gil Blas of Santillane - Alain René le Sage (best fiction books of all time .txt) 📗
- Author: Alain René le Sage
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in that! his honour was his weak side! for instead of bidding up
to my uncle’s estimate of ten or twelve pistoles, the rascal had
the impudence to offer three ducats, which I accepted with as
light a heart as if I had got the best of the bargain.
Having disencumbered myself of my mule in so tradesmanlike a
manner, I went with my landlord to a carrier who was to set out
early the next morning for Astorga, and engaged to call me up in
time. When we had settled the hire of the mule, as well as the
expenses on the road, I turned back towards the inn with
Corcuelo, who, as we went along, got into the private history of
this muleteer. When I had been pestered with all the tittle-tattle of the town about this fellow, the changes were just
beginning to ring on some new subject; but, by good luck, a
pretty-looking sort of a man very civilly interrupted my
loquacious friend. I left them together, and sauntered on without
the slightest suspicion of being at all concerned in their
discourse.
I ordered supper as soon as I got to the inn. It was a fish day:
but I thought eggs were better suited to my finances. While they
were getting ready I joined in conversation with the landlady,
whom I had not seen before. She seemed a pretty piece of goods
enough, and such a stirring body, that I should have concluded,
if her husband had not told me so, her tavern must have plenty of
custom. The moment the omelet was served up I sat down to table
by myself, and had scarcely got the relish of it, when my
landlord walked in, followed by the man who had stopped him in
the street. This pleasant gentleman wore a long rapier, and
might, perhaps, be about thirty years of age. He came up to me in
the most friendly manner possible. Mr Professor, says he, I have
just now heard that you are the renowned Gil Blas of Santillane,
that ornament of Oviedo and luminary of philosophy. And do my
eyes behold that very greatest of all great scholars and wits,
whose reputation has run hither so fast before him? Little do you
think, continues he, directing his discourse to the landlord and
landlady, little do you imagine, I say, what good luck has
befallen you. Why, you have got hold of a treasure. In this young
gentleman you behold the eighth wonder of the world. Then running
up and throwing his arms about my neck, Excuse me, added he; but
worlds would not bribe me to suppress the rapturous emotions your
honoured presence has excited.
I could not answer him so glibly as I wished, not so much for
want of words as of breath; for he hugged me so tight that I
began to be alarmed for my wind pipe. As soon, however, as I had
got my head out of durance, I replied, Signor cavalier, I had not
the least conception that my name was known at Pegnaflor. Known?
resumed he in the same pompous style; we keep a register of all
great persons within a circuit of twenty leagues round us. You
have the character of a prodigy here; and I have not a shadow of
doubt, but one day or other Spain will be as proud of numbering
you among her rare productions, as Greece of having given birth
to her seven wise men. This fine speech was followed as before;
and I really began to think that with all my classical honours I
should at last be doomed to share the fate of Antaeus. If I had
been master of ever so little experience, I should not have been
the dupe of his rhodomontade. I must have discovered him by his
outrageous compliments, to be one of those parasites who swarm in
every town, and get into a stranger’s company on his arrival, to
appease the wolf in their stomachs at his expense; but my youth
and vanity tempted me to draw a quite opposite conclusion. My
admirer was very clever in my eyes, and I asked him to supper on
the strength of it. Oh! most willingly, cried be: with all my
heart and soul. My fortunate star predominates, now that I have
the honour of being in company with the illustrious Gil Blas of
Santillane, and I shall certainly make the most of my good
fortune as long as it lasts. My appetite is rather delicate, but
I will just sit down with you by way of being sociable, and if I
can swallow a bit! only just not to look sulky; for we
philosophers are careless of the body.
These words were no sooner out of his mouth, than my panegyrist
took his seat opposite to me. A cover was laid for him in due
form and order. First he fell on the omelet with as much
perseverance as if he had not tasted food for three whole days.
By the complacency with which he eyed it I was morally certain
the poor pancake was at death’s door. I therefore ordered its
heir apparent to succeed; and the business was despatched with
such speed, that the second made its appearance on the table,
just as we; — no: — I beg pardon; — just as he had taken the
last lick of its predecessor. He pressed forward the main
business, however, with a diligence and activity proportioned to
the importance of the object he had in view: so that he contrived
to load me with panegyric on panegyric, without losing a single
stroke in the progress of mastication. Now all this gave me no
slender conceit of my pretty little self. When a man eats, he
must drink. The first toast of course was my health. The second,
in common civility, was my father and mother, whose happiness in
having such an angel of a son, he could not sufficiently envy or
admire. All this while he kept filling my glass, and challenging
me to keep pace with him. It was impossible to be backward in
doing justice to such excellent toasts and sentiments: the
compliments with which they were seasoned did not come amiss; so
that I got into such a convivial mood, at observing our second
omelet to disappear not insensibly, as just to ask the landlord
if he could not find us a little bit of fish. Master Corcuelo,
who to all appearance played booty with the parasite, told me he
had an excellent trout; but those who eat him must pay for him. I
am afraid he is meat for your masters. Meat for our masters!
exclaims my very humble servant in an angry tone of voice: that
is more than you know, my friend. Are you yet to learn that the
best of your larder is not too good for the renowned Gil Blas of
Santillane? Go where he will, he is fit to table with princes.
I was very glad that he took up the landlord’s last expression;
because if he had not, I should. I felt myself a little hurt at
it, and said to Corcuelo with some degree of hauteur: Produce
this trout of yours, and I will take the consequences. The
landlord, who had got just what he wanted, set himself to work,
and served it up in high order. At the first glance of this third
course I saw such pleasure sparkling in the parasite’s eyes, as
proved him to be of a very complying temper; just as ready to do
a kindness by the fish, as by those said eggs of which he had
given so good an account. But at last he was obliged to lay down
his arms for fear of accidents; as his magazine was crammed to
the very throat. Having eat and drank his fill, he bethought him
of putting a finishing hand to the farce. Master Gil Blas, said
he, as he rose from the table, I am too well pleased with my
princely entertainment to leave you without a word of advice, of
which you seem to stand in much need. From this time forward be
on your guard against extravagant praise. Do not trust men till
you know them. You may meet with many another man, who, like me,
may amuse himself at your expense, and perhaps carry the joke a
little further. But do not you be taken in a second time, to
believe yourself; on the word of such fellows, the eighth wonder
of the world. With this sting in the tail of his farewell speech
he very coolly took his leave.
I was as much alive to so ridiculous a circumstance, as I have
ever been in after-life to the most severe mortifications. I did
not know how to reconcile myself to the idea of having been so
egregiously taken in, or, in fact, to lowering of my pride. So,
so! quoth I, this rascal has been putting his tricks upon
travellers, has he? Then he only wanted to pump my landlord! or
more likely they were both in a story. Ah! my poor Gil Blas, thou
hadst better hide thy silly head! To have suffered such knaves as
these to turn thee into ridicule! A pretty story they will make
of this! It is sure to travel back to Oviedo; and will give our
friends a hopeful prospect of thy success in life. The family
will be quite delighted to think what a blessed harvest all their
pious advice has produced. There was no occasion to preach up
morals to thee; for verily thou hast more of the dupe than the
sharper in thy composition. Ready to tear my eyes out or bite my
fingers off from spite and vexation, I locked myself up in my
chamber and went to bed, but not to sleep; of which I had not got
a wink when the muleteer came to tell me, that he only waited for
me to set out on his journey. I got up as expeditiously as I
could; and while I was dressing Corcuelo put in his appearance,
with a little bill in his hand; — a slight memorandum of the
trout! — But paying through the nose was not the worst of it;
for I had the vexation to perceive, that while I was counting
over the cost, this hangdog was chuckling at the recollection of
the night before. Having been fleeced most shamefully for a
supper, which stuck in my stomach though I had scarcely come in
for a morsel of it, I joined the muleteer with my baggage, giving
to as many devils as there are saints in the calendar, the
parasite, the landlord, and the inn.
CH. III. — The muleteer’s temptation on the road; its
consequences, and the situation of Gil Blas between Scylla and
Charybdis.
I WAS not the only passenger. There were two young gentlemen of
Pegnaflor; a little chorister of Mondognedo, who was travelling
about the country, and a young tradesman of Astorga, returning
home from Verco with his new-married wife. We soon got
acquainted, and exchanged the usual confidence of travellers,
telling one another whence we came and whither we were going. The
bride was young enough; but so dark-complexioned, with so little
of what a man likes to look at in a woman, that I did not think
her worth the trouble. But she had youth and a good crummy person
on her side, and the muleteer, being rather less nice in his
taste, was resolved to try if he could not get into her good
graces. This pretty project occupied his ingenuity during the
whole day; but he deferred the execution till we should get to
Cacabelos, the last place
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