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Chapter One


I hear the whispering. Why can't anyone just forget what happened Friday night? Why can't they stop looking at me and whispering? When I look at them, they act like they weren't looking at me. But I know different. I can feel their eyes piercing the back of my head. Their stares burn through my red hair and to my skull. Why can't they just -
"Does anybody want to give a try and tell me what they think this quote means?" Mr. Davie is looking towards the board at his question. "That doesn't kill us, makes us stronger" Are you freaking serious? Does everybody know? Has she really told everyone that even the teachers are mocking me in their own clever ways through the course material? Why? Why did I believe her? Why did I even trust her? I thought we were friends. We've been friends since Junior Kindergarten. Junior Kindergarten! That quote is exactly what she said to me at the party before she started yelling at me and turned everyone's eyes on me. She had told everyone that I slept with the entire soccer team. But I didn't. I didn't! How could she even smile after what she did? How could there be such a cruel person inside her? I hear the whispering again. The low hum of words that buzz around the air and sting my flesh. Mr. Davie drops a text book on the floor. He looks annoyed.
"Someone want to tell me what is so interesting that you can't even to pretend to listen?" He scans his eyes over the classroom. His eyes meeting every student. It's like a wave. There's a snicker from the back of the classroom. It's her. I can tell that evil snicker from anywhere.
"Ah, Miss Brittany Deraeu. What is taking place in the students' social life that is so distracting" Mr. Davie crosses his arms and leans back on his desk. Brittany flips her hair and stands up beside her desk.
"Well Mr. Davie. There was a party last Friday night, where an event took place. Such a horrible scandalous event. Shocking really. We're all so stunned" I can feel her eyes on the back of my head. I want to shrink in my seat. I want to curl up in a ball. I want to scream. I want to cry. I want to die. There's not one reason why I should be here anymore. All of my friends+ are gone. Washed away by hurricane Brittany. The bell rings. I gather my books and hurry out the door. The hall becomes a highway. Rush hour time. All headlights are brightly pointed at me. I'm a dear in the headlights. Just keep moving I tell myself. I go to my locker. 34 5 16. Pictures of Brittany, and Me. Anger over comes me and rip it off the locker door and tear it into pieces. I turn my palm upside down and let the pieces fall to the ground. The sound of high heels on the floor gets louder and louder. I wish I could disappear.
"Hi Alex. Did you enjoy yourself this Friday? I was surprised the team even wanted to bang you. I mean look at you. Your ugly face, those pale blue eyes, and those freckles. And you curly red rats nest that you call hair... pathetic." I hold a piece of my hair. She smiles and then walks away. One of the girls from her clique walk past me and bump me in my shoulder sending me into my locker. I keep my head down. I grab my bag, fling it over my shoulder and slam my locker door shut.
"Ooooo the soccer slut is angry. Watch out everyone!" Some ass called out. The whole hallway breaks into laughter. I run out the doors and do the sidewalk until I'm two blocks from school. Why does everyone believe her lies? Who crowned her queen? Everyone I knew has now turned their backs on me. I kick a rock down the sidewalk, my sneaker got stuck on a lifted piece of sidewalk and down I went. I sit up and look my hands and knees. They're scrapped and blood is starting to surface. Great. I start to get up, when a car passes by. Mud goes flying towards me. I close my eyes. I look back up and see Brittany and clique flying down the road in blue BMW. Their witch cackle loud and booming in the air.
"Alex, are you alright?" Danny. I look up at him. He's so cute. i can't help but let my guard down. It's that shaggy brown hair, his tall muscular tan build and those deep brown eyes.
"Y-yeah. I'm alright thanks." He gives me a hand and helps me up.
"Here, let me walk you home."
"That's nice of you but you don't have to do that." I force a small laugh and shake my head.
"I know. But I want to." We walk side by side on the sidewalk. The wind is starting to pick up. I look up to the sky. The black clouds dance along in the sky to their booming music of thunder.
"It's going to storm soon." Danny said breaking the silence. Since grade 5 I've had sort of a crush on him. He's always been nice to me. He's a year ahead of me though.
"Yeah, it looks like it's going to be a nasty one too" I say still looking up at the sky. Why is he being nice to me? Hasn't he heard the rumors? He stops walking and grabs my arms and turns me toward him. I'm so confused and caught off guard all I can do is blink.
"Uhh, Alex, I don't know how to ask this..." My heart starts bounding a mile a second. He's going to hear the beating of my heart. I'm such a freak.
"The rumor that's going around the school... it's not true is it?" I want to yell, scream and cry. Why? How the hell did she come up with all these things? I can feel the anger and sadness boiling through my veins.
"I didn't mean to upset you Alex. I don't believe them. I've lived across the street from you since we moved in, and you don't seem like that at all." I can feel a tear slip down my cheek, I try to turn my head so he couldn't see but he had his hand on my cheek. He wiped it away with his thumb and smiled at me. Is this really happening? Did he seriously do that. We start walking again in silence.
"No. No it's not true. Brittany said that ‘cause I wouldn't sleep with one guy off the team, let alone the whole freaking team." Danny nodded his head.
"I thought so. What happened between you two? Weren't you guys good friends?"
"I- I don't know. As soon as we came into high school, she turned into the thing she is today.”

Chapter Two


I sit alone in an empty house in my room. I'm lying on my bed looking up towards the ceiling. What Brittany said is whirling around and around in my head. I get up and walk into the bathroom. I look into the mirror. There it is. A pathetic looking 17 year old girl looking back at me - is me. I want scream and break the mirror. I walk over to the shower and turn the water on. I slip into the shower and start getting my hair wet. Am I reallythat pathetic looking girl that I saw in the mirror? That everyone else sees as pathetic too? I grab the shampoo and squeeze some into my hands. I lather it into my hair. It's ugly. My hair. I have to make it look better. I grab the conditioner and lather. I wonder why Danny walked me home, I mean I know he wanted to know the truth but still. Was there another reason? Could he actually - No. Don't think that I tell myself. He doesn't like you. He was just curious. How could he ever like a pathetic girl like me? I turn the water off and step out of the shower. I reach for a towel but I slip and hit my head against the tub wall. I'm pathetic I tell myself. I wrap myself in the towel. I look into the mirror. Now I look like a drowning rat. How can I make myself look pretty? I see scissors in the drawer. I pick them up and look at them. I reach for a strand of my hair. I'm ugly. I hear someone come in through the door. I throw the scissors into the drawer and run to my room. I rush to get dressed.
"Alie hun, you home?" Mom.
"Yeah mom, I'm just getting out of the shower."
"Okay hunny. Hurry down. Someone's here for ya." Please please please let it be Danny. If it's Danny, I want to look good. I find a pair of denim short shorts and a blue and grey striped tank. I dry my hair quickly with the towel and throw it in a wet messy bun and run down the stairs. I'm so excited I'm nervous. Danny is so cute - Brittany. I stop dead in my tracks when I see her standing there at the island talking with my mom. What the hell? Why is she here? Is she going to apologise? No one sees or hears me untill my dead walks past me and noogies me on the head.
"Hey kiddo. How was your day?"
"Oh Alex, we thought you were still upstairs." She turns around and smiles at me. What is she up to?
"So do you two girls have any of the same classes this semester?" My dad asked, but I know he doesn't really care.
"Yes! We have english together!" Brittany shreiks. Trying to make it look like we're friends. Why bother? Not like she can turn back the clock and change what she did.
"Hey, I wanted to talk to you. Can we go to your room?" Wow. She's killing it with the over sweetness.
"Uhh... sure" I sprint up the stairs. Part of me wants to wait for her to come to the door so I can slam it into her face. Instead I sit on my computer chair with my arms wrapped around my legs holding them into my chest. She takes a seat on my bed.
"So... How you've been?" She looks at me. You're kidding right? I just stare back at her with an empty look.
"I know about the rumour you told everyone about. How could you do that?" I didn't even know I was talking. She smiles.
"Look, if you want to be friends still, you got to do something. I want you to sleep with someone. The fact that you're still a virgin is pathetic. You do that, and I'll tell everyone that

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