Karma - Diane Godfrey-Doherty (famous ebook reader txt) 📗

get home, I need to get home. I want Momma; I need my Momma. I gathered up my packsack and books and looked to make sure the coast was clear. Then I ran as fast as my long legs would carry me until I was through the door of my house and safely in the arms of my mother. “What the heck,..........oh my goodness Karma, what happened, Momma asked ?” “You have blood all over your leg and oh my look at your face. What the heck is going on?” All I could do was cry the deepest sobs and whales I have ever cried before. All I wanted was my mother’s arms to make me feel safe and make everything go away. Once I had made it there in to her arms I could let it all go. I must have cried for an hour. My mother was beside herself wondering what had happened to me, as she asked me so many questions I just couldn’t answer because I was crying so hard I couldn’t get the words out. I made such a racket that my older sister Jen got off the phone to come and see what the noise was about. When she took one look at me, she knew right away what happened.
“Who did this Karma? Tell me now?” Jen was angry; I could see it in her eyes. My mother just stared at Jen and waited for me to answer. My mother was not much of a fighter and didn’t do much when it came to us kids being bullied. But my sister Jen never put up with it. She was strong, probably the strongest person I knew besides my brother Matthew. I never saw Jen fight anyone but she had courage and could say just about anything and the other kids just walked away from her. “I’m not sure”, I cried to Jen. “I was just walking home, and....and.....I”, the sobbing wouldn’t stop and it was hard to tell the story to both Momma and Jen. “Let her calm down now Jennifer”, Momma said. “Give her a minute”. “Ok, Karma, its ok now your home but we do need to know what happened.” My mother turned to reach into the refrigerator then returned with a cold drink and a cold wet cloth to press against my face. After some gentle tender loving care, Momma was always good for that. I was able to talk clearly and explain to them what happened. “I don’t know these kids Momma and they are older than me I’m sure of it”. Jen just stared off into space thinking quietly, maybe deciding what she was going to do to these kids. But then she turned around to me and said “alright this is not going to happen again, because I’m going to walk you home every day”. My school ends 30 minutes before yours so I’m just going to have to go there to get you. “We will see who bullies who now”, Jen said with fire in her eyes. She was angry, I could tell and so could my mother. “Just make sure Karma gets home safely Jennifer that’s all you need to do”. “You don’t need to get involved with those kinds of kids”. My sister’s eyes just squinted as if she heard my mother speaking but couldn’t understand what she was saying. Daddy wasn’t home from work yet and I knew I would have to tell him the whole story too. I’d wait until after dinner so as not to upset anyone else while we ate. That was our family time, Momma always would say. So I didn’t like to spoil it with any bad stuff. But before we could sit at the table my father came to me and told me that Momma had told him the whole story. She wanted to save me the pain of having to tell it again. My Dad gave me the biggest hug ever. I felt so protected in his arms, as if no one or nothing would hurt me. Even though both my parents were very loving, neither of them took it upon themselves to put an end to the bulling. No one went to the principal to complain or to the parents of the other kids. I didn’t realize until much, much later that it was because that was the way people thought in those days. Kids will be kids and bulling was just something kids had to deal with. Sort of a rite of passage as they grew up. It wouldn’t be until my generation of children grew up and put rules in place to protect children from bullies that things would change.
I was too scared to get up the next morning and get dressed for the day. I certainly didn’t want to walk alone to school and I thought I would have to like I always did. I came down stairs for breakfast hoping to plead with my mother to let me stay home for the day. As I got to the table, I noticed that Momma had my lunch made for the day and was confused as to why I wasn’t dressed for school. “Momma, I’m sick” I said with a cough. “Oh really, Karma are you sure”? My mother could always tell when we where fibbing. “Ya”, cough, cough, “I don’t want to go to school today can I just stay home”? I asked sweetly. “Oh, Karma I know you don’t want to have to go to face those bad kids today, but you have to”. “You have to go and face your fears head on, honey”. “Look them in the eye before you can walk away from them,” she continued. I looked confused at her. Did she mean I had to go up to the bullies and look at them in their eyes and walk away? What was the point of that? My mother continued to lecture me as she walked me back up to my room to get dressed for school. When we got there I knew what she would be looking for to dress me in and so I pleaded with her before she started that if I had to go to school any more I didn’t want to show my skin. So I didn’t want to wear dresses or shorts anymore. I told her strongly. “Oh Karma, please” My mother said in disgust. “You are who you are, and who you are just who I want you to be”. “Be yourself”. “You’re beautiful and I love you.” “I know you do Momma I love you too”. “But the less the kids see of my different colour skin the better and then maybe they will just leave me alone”. “I understand Karma”, Momma replied. “You wear what you want”.” But do me a favour, she asked. Think about how much control you’re giving those bullies”. “You always loved to wear you’re jumpers and dresses and now you want to hide in long pants and long shirts”. “And we both know it’s because of what happened yesterday”. “Am I right”? I couldn’t answer her. I just hung my head. I knew she was right. My Momma always was, but it didn’t change my mind. I needed to cover up. Without answering her I went to my closet and pulled out blue navy pants and a white long sleeve top with buttons all the way down. I wore white socks and black dressy shoes. I looked in the mirror and thought. There, I look just like everyone else, except that my face and hands are brown. Maybe no one will notice. I could only hope.

Chapter 9

Today I had my sister Jen walking me to school and when we got there it was just about time to go in. “Are you going to be here after school Jen”? I asked nervously. “Yes Karma, I’ll be here, don’t you worry. See you later ok”? “Ok. Bye Jen”. “Bye Karma”, she replied after giving me a big reassuring hug. Shortly after Jen left the bell rang and it was time to go in. I looked around for Ally but didn’t see her. I thought she might have been away sick until I saw her coming down the hall. She looked different. She had an angry look on her face and as she got closer I could see that her white tights were ripped at the knee and she was bleeding. “Hey Ally? Are you alright”? Ally didn’t answer me she just kept walking straight into the classroom and to her desk. I looked at her and wondered what happened. Did she fall? Why wouldn’t she talk to me? I went into class and sat at my desk until class began. I didn’t get a chance all morning to talk to Ally to ask what happened to her before school until morning recess. That’s when I jumped at the chance to get her attention before she could run out of the room and on to the yard. But to my surprise she just sat at her desk and didn’t move an inch. I sat next to her and looked at her for a long minute before asking if she was alright. Still she said nothing. “What’s wrong”? I asked but still got nothing in return. So I just sat, not knowing what to say or what to do. “Ally, will you talk to me, please”? Just as I said that I could see a single tear roll down her cheek. “Oh Ally, Ally what’s wrong”? “Please tell me”? Finally she looked straight at me and asked why boys are so cruel? “Why what happened”? I asked. All Ally could do was curse the boys at our school and say how she would pay them back for doing this to her. I didn’t understand what she was talking about. “What did the boys do to you Ally”? “There just mean,” was all she could say. And that they would never ever hurt her again. At that moment I thought I knew exactly what she was talking about but I wasn’t positive. So I kept quiet and kept my eyes on her while we just sat there in the classroom alone until the recess bell rang to notify the other kids it was time to come back inside. When I was back in my seat I thought about the kids who hurt me the day before and all the mean things that were said to me and I wondered if Ally had ever been called those horrible words.
The day past not as quickly as I would have liked but it did and I was relieved to see Jen waiting for me outside the doors at the end of the day. I looked around to see if Ally was anywhere around. I thought that maybe she would want to walk home our way. But I couldn’t find her anywhere. Maybe her mom or dad picked her up. Well I was happy to see Jen and I gave her the biggest hug ever.
I didn’t see Ally the next day and I wondered if she