Forgive Me by Kateri Stanley (love letters to the dead txt) 📗

“I’m not going,” Cameron said as she cleaned.

“How come?”

“I’ve got better things to do with my time. Just because everybody else is going doesn’t mean I have to.”

Stripe had to think before she could respond. “But it’s a celebration. We’re completing high school.” She understood not following the social convention, but not Cameron’s sudden defensiveness. It was just the prom. “I’m entering the contest and making my own dress. My mom thinks it’ll be good for me to raise money for college.”

“What does your dress look like?”

“It’s light blue with double shoulder straps.”

“That colour won’t suit you.”

“How come?”

“You need to stand out. Your skin is too pale for blue, I think you’d look better in red. It would blend with your blonde hair.”

Is she giving me a compliment? If she was, Stripe didn’t know how to handle it. “Why red?”

Cameron moved some of her hair from her skin, inside Stripe was screaming. “It goes with your green eyes.”

“Yours are really light blue.”

She smirked. “My grandmother had blue eyes too supposedly. Well, that’s what my mom said.”

Stripe could’ve danced when detention finished. They walked back to Cameron’s truck and she left the door open. “Wanna lift?”

“No, it’s okay. I’ll walk.”

Cameron studied her for a couple of seconds. “You know, I’ve actually enjoyed detention. That’s a first for me. Thank you.”

“No need to thank me.”

“We should go out for a meal or a movie sometime.”

“Y-Yes...I-I’d like that. There’s a Robin Williams movie coming out soon and the movie palace are having another rerun of Aliens…”

“I’m not a horror fan.”

“Really? You? I wouldn’t think you’d be scared of anything, not even slimy scaly aliens.”

“They’re just not for me. Do you have a date for it?”

“For Aliens?”

“No the prom, silly.”

“Oh, well. I’m going with my friends. I don’t need a date.”

“I could go with you if you want...” Cameron watched her sharply and then she began to laugh. “It’s okay. We don’t have to. You looked like you were gonna shit yourself. Anyway, I’ll see you on Monday. We’ll do dinner or a movie another time.”

“Sure,” Stripe said. “I can’t wait.”

Cameron watched her again, this time with a shine of curiosity. “Can I do one thing before I go?”

“What?”

Darkness moved over Stripe’s gaze like a huddle of thunder clouds. Cameron was in her personal space and she pressed her back up against the body work of the truck. Cameron pushed her mouth against hers and Stripe tasted a flush of strawberry lip gloss.

Kissing was odd at the beginning but after playing the rhythm, Stripe began to warm to it. She wasn’t scared when Cameron’s tongue rolled into her mouth, more surprised that her long standing enemy was performing a French kiss. Little sounds of enjoyment escaped her mouth and Cameron returned them. When their petting began to deepen, Cameron picked Stripe up, pushing her body against the truck, pulling one leg over her hip. She began to grind her pelvis against Stripe’s crotch. As they kissed and moved against one another. Stripe moulded her head into the back of Cameron’s hand. It was strange, because for Stripe, Cameron was a perfect fit.

A niggling thought intruded on her delight as she pictured the stunned reactions of her friends and her parents. Would they accept her? Would they understand? Would they still love her?

Her insides felt like they were full of hot air. She was trying her hardest not to break as Jace reeled off about the difference in certain fabrics and the wonders of the cross stitch. Stripe had to let it out or she’d explode.

Jace painted David Bowie’s Ziggy Stardust colours on her face. Stripe was conveniently used as a canvas whenever they had sleepovers, she didn’t mind but her skin was beginning to clam up. She admired the poster on the wall of Tim Curry in The Rocky Horror Picture Show. She would’ve given anything to borrow Dr Frank-N-Furter’s confidence right now. The way he was kicking up his high heels, his red fingernails stroking his fishnet tights, leaning back in his chair, flipping the camera with a flirtatious wink. He didn’t have a care in the world, a true free spirit.

Stripe’s lips dried like a stone in the desert. I guess this is the price for harbouring a secret.

“Is there something on your mind?” Jace asked.

Shit, she knows. “No, does it look like it?”

Jace blew lightly, brushing some of the powder off her cheek. “I don’t know. You’re really quiet tonight and you haven’t touched your cookie dough. Normally you gobble it up.”

Her friend was right, she hadn’t given in to her craving of everything chocolate chips and cream. “I’ve had a change in heart about my prom dress,” Stripe said, pushing the words out of her mouth.

Jace recoiled, her face crumpled with confusion. “What do you mean? I thought you had it all planned out.”

“Yeah, but I’ve changed it. Kinda had some new ideas.” She brought out a sketch pad from her bag. “This is what I’m looking at now.”

Her best friend gawped. “Stripe, are you trying to look like a porn star? Why red? And why one shoulder strap?”

“What’s wrong with it? How would I look like a porn star from wearing this?”

“It’s just not…you. That’s all.”

“I’m trying to branch out, to do something new,” Stripe said. “What’s wrong with it?”

Jace ran her eyes over the sketch. “I don’t hate it per se. It’s nice, but I didn’t think you’d wear anything like this. Plus, you hardly wear dresses. Actually, you never do. You know, you don’t have to wear a dress. You could wear a suit, like Diane Keaton does for award ceremonies.”

“I know, but this is all about getting me out of my comfort zone. You’ve got to help me.”

Jace picked up her makeup and returned to her work. “Of course I’ll help you. You’d never cough up money for a prom dress.”

Stripe laughed. “You know me so well.”

Her friend grinned back. “By any chance, how did this happen?”

“What do you mean?”

“Your sudden change