The Reed Security Relationship Manual: A Reed Security Romance - Giulia Lagomarsino (best book club books of all time TXT) 📗

“Freckles, just remember, you need someone to help you raise that baby.”

She smirked at me. “That’s what the ladies are for.”

Chapter Twenty

Knight

This was the most pathetic thing I had ever seen in all my life. Here we were, constantly fighting battles for our lives, and the guys were worried about a fucking relationship manual. To top it off, Cap went and got Maggie pregnant again. We were all going to have to deal with her wrath for the next year and a half at least.

Cap was a great leader, and I would follow him anywhere, but right now, he was too busy hiding his balls to deal with the situation before us. “Alright, everyone shut the fuck up!”

Husbands and wives all shut their mouths and turned their attention to me. A fight had been brewing for the past week after Rocco’s announcement of the relationship manual being finished, and it was time to end this animosity and get back to work.

“Since all of you have fucked this up beyond repair, I’m taking it upon myself to put this thing to rest. Guys, face it, you’ve lost. There’s no relationship manual. There’s no rulebook. Hell, it shouldn’t even exist.” Rocco started to rumble about it, but I cut him off with a glare. “End of subject. The idea itself is insane. If you want things to go a certain way in your marriage, you talk about it with your spouse.”

“Or you just kidnap her and make her see things your way,” Craig said, earning a smack from Reese. “What? It’s how I got you, my little Reese’s Pieces.”

“Enough! Craig, I hate to point this out to you, but you don’t have what it takes to be a stalker. It’s never going to happen, so give it up. You have this twisted version of stalking that doesn’t even make sense. I’m sorry, you can’t join the club.”

He looked like I had kicked him, but enough was enough.

“And Storm, stop trying to push Tacos around. You lost the thumb war, but you won the girl. Sinner, get control of your woman.” Cara glared at him, but he glared right back. “No. You were pregnant and you put yourself in danger. It’s unacceptable and half the reason these guys wanted the stupid rulebook. Cap, I swear to God, if you knock up Maggie one more time, I’ll castrate you myself. She doesn’t want a fucking baseball team. Cazzo, I really thought you were smarter than to insinuate that your wife should stay home and cook for you.”

I looked around the room at the sheepish faces of the men. It was sad, really.

“As of this moment, the rulebook ceases to exist. I don’t want to hear another word about it, and if I do, I’ll be having you train the men Sean sends our way. Is that understood?”

The grumbles of agreement weren’t exactly what I was hoping for, but I knew that just the threat of having to deal with men that couldn’t hack it was enough to keep them in line.

“I have something to say,” Maggie stepped forward. “The relationship manual will stay. It’s become increasingly clear over the past few weeks that you need this more than ever. So, print it out, hand it out, and read that thing like it’s the holy grail.”

I crossed my arms over my chest. “And the rulebook?”

“Why would any of us sign a rulebook? That’s just ridiculous.”

“What are you going to give us for the rulebook?” I negotiated.

She narrowed her eyes at me. “Your life.”

I glanced around the room at the guys, who all watched intently. It was clear that this was a hard line for the ladies, one that none of them would negotiate terms on. The guys were going to have to deal with it. The glint in Maggie’s eyes said that she meant business, and now that she was pregnant, she was bound to rage against anyone that fucked with her. I really thought her counter offer was quite reasonable. I nodded in agreement. After all, you didn’t fuck with pregnant women.

“Second, the rulebook may be off for the men, but I can assure you that we will not be giving up the rights to a rulebook.”

She held out her hand and Claire placed a notebook in her hands. She slammed it down on the table and slid it across to me. “Each of you will read it and sign it. There are no other options here, gentlemen. Familiarize yourselves with it, because if you don’t, you will feel our wrath.” She turned to the ladies behind her and made a circle gesture with her finger. “Let’s go, ladies. Our work is done.”

We all watched them go, but as soon as they were out the door, the guys all scrambled to reach the book. Cap was the first to get his hands on it, and the others were leaning over his shoulder, desperate to see what was written inside.

“This can’t be real,” Ice said in astonishment.

“What does this have to do with me?” Chris asked. “I’m the least likely to fuck up out of any of you.”

“We’re not really signing this, are we, Cap?” Burg asked.

I watched as Cap slowly lowered the book to the table and held out his hand. “Knight, get me a fucking pen.”

Part Two

The Manual

Tips For Ensuring A Healthy Relationship

Random Thoughts

Random Knowledge To Keep In Mind

Although listed as a Relationship Manual and Rulebook, this is not actually a legally binding contract in any way, and will not hold up in any court of law. Use this information to the best of your abilities, and treat it as gospel.

Do not discuss the relationship manual with your spouse. This will save you tons of fighting, and inevitably save you from a night on the sofa.

Do not watch Lifetime movies. We’re still unclear as to why this is so dangerous, but Jules assures us that