How to Make Anyone Fall in Love with You by Leil Lowndes (knowledgeable books to read TXT) 📗

"Well," he said, his voice rising a few decibels,

"you'll be a bigger help if you just stay out of the kitchen and keep doing . . . whatever you're doing."

"Whatever I'm doing!" I cried back. "I'm in there struggling with that darn lamp. You know all about electrical wiring. I don't. And you're sitting in here—

not even noticing I'm having trouble—letting me fight with those wires. Thanks a lot!" I stormed out of the kitchen.

Bad scene.

Well, by that evening the situation had cooled down sufficiently, and we discussed our little tiff. I brought up the subject by telling George the lamp was fixed.

(No thanks to him, I resisted saying.) But I'd had a terrible time with it. Then I ventured to ask him why he hadn't helped me with it when it was so obvious I was having a problem. George said, "Of course I didn't offer to help. Leil, tIrust

you. I wanted to show that I trusted you to do it yourself."

Like a holy fax from on high, I got it! Of course, George wanted to know that I trusted him to do the molding job. It's hard to believe that highly evolved and intelligent male Quarry could be so primitive as to invest ego in accomplishing such minor motor-skill tasks, but they do. Conversely, my wanting George to help me was my female desire to have George show that he cared about what I was doing. It is now chiseled in my brain. Men want to betrusted . Women want to feel cared for .

Huntresses, until notified, return receipt requested, assume your Quarry is a typical male who wants to be trusted to do everything right. The following advice may sound like antifemmist lunacy but, I'm sad to say, it does work: Never give a man Page 223

advice when he's helping you—never . Even if he's trying to fix your leaky faucet with Scotch tape and you know seven better ways to do it, hold your tongue.

TECHNIQUE #69 (FOR HUNTRESSES):

ZIP YOUR LIP AND LET HIM BOTCH IT ALL

BY HIMSELF

Huntresses, when your Quarry is doing something for you, even if he's bungling it beyond belief, zip your lip. Unless it's a matter of life and death, force an appreciative smile.

Run outside where he can't hear you if you have to scream, "Stuuuuuupid, do it this way!"

Huntresses, you have my solemn promise that this way you'll be happier and keep your relationship intact. (You can always secretly call a plumber the next day.) Your Quarry will never tell you his affection dripped away because you mistrusted his plumbing expertise. Many relationships have gone down the drain for lesser reasons.

Hunters, you too can glean a moral from the sadly true story above. The message of the story for you, however, is just the reverse of what it is for Huntresses.

TECHNIQUE #70 (FOR HUNTERS):

UNZIP YOUR LIP AND LEND A HELPING

HAND

Hunters, when you see a woman struggling, go to her and ask if she would like your help. Unlike your male buddies, she will not assume you don't trust her to do it herself. She will interpret your help as caring about her and her problems.

Incidentally, Huntresses, you're in for a long wait if you expect your Quarry to offer to help you. If he's the typical male, as George is, he may hesitate to give you any help because he thinks that you would be insulted by such an offer. It's up to you to elicit his aid.

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Huntresses, when you ask your Quarry to give you a hand, watch your words. The subtleties that seep up out of the smoldering communications gap are endless. For example, Huntresses, suppose you're at the beach with your Quarry. You pull your sunglasses out of your beach bag and, whoops, the little screw that holds the earpiece to the rim falls out. You look up at your mechanically minded boyfriend and say sweetly, "Could you fix this for me?"

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TECHNIQUE #71 (FOR HUNTRESSES): ASK

WOULD NOTCOULD

Huntresses, this is subtle stuff indeed, but saywould instead of couldwhen asking your Quarry for favors.

When he hears could, the competitive beast hears a challenge to his experitise, not a request fo r his valuable services.

If he takes the sunglasses out of your hand and gruffly says, "Of course I can," you may think he's being a tad brutish. But he hasn't heard your request the way you meant it. The male brain hears couldliterally as "Are youableto fix this for me?"

That' s a veiled challenge. It's asking him if he is capable of helping you.

Say, "Would you give me a hand with this?" It's a subtle difference of one letter, bwutouldassumes that of course he is capable, and it offers him the opportunity to be gallant.

Hunters, here are two little words to win her heart and convince your Quarry that you are a rare man indeed. Ask her to sit down before you utter them, because a woman is so unaccustomed to hearing these two words from a man that she may topple over.

(And probably willl. . . right into your arms.) If something goes wrong in your relationship, or you have messed up in any way, simply say—here goes—

"I'm sorry."

Women say these words often, in fact too much. Men never say them. (The last recorded instance of a male saying "I'm sorry" was in Atlanta, Georgia, in 1907.

Upon further investigation, however, it was discovered that the speaker was just a man named Rory having a mouthful of food.)

TECHNIQUE #72 (FOR HUNTERS):

I'M SORRY

Hunters, when you mess up, simply have the courage to say "I'm sorry." When you see how your Quarry warms to you, you won't be sorry you said it.

trying to introduce himself in spite of Page 226

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the Gender Gap?

Hunters, huntresses, we have just viewed the tip of the iceberg of gender differences. After decades of denial, scientists are finally aiming their instruments at the ancient marvel. The deeper they probe, the more they find the glacier extends many fathoms below our