How To Be Merry - B. Merry (ebook reader online txt) 📗
- Author: B. Merry
Book online «How To Be Merry - B. Merry (ebook reader online txt) 📗». Author B. Merry
My name is Brian Merry. I am seventeen years old and I am going to tell you how you can live a happier life. I haven’t gone through any life changing; near death type experiences and I definitely haven’t received a direct message from God. I am just a human being like you! Now, if you feel like what you are about to read is a load of crap and that you don’t need to listen to a little kid about what it means to be happy then just close out this web page right now. I guess you’ll never truly learn what has made me one of the happiest people on earth. This book will not be a step-by-step guide, but that’s okay because you’re not handed a step-by-step guide when you pop out of the womb. I can’t tailor this book for YOU. Everybody is different and that is what makes this world great! But more on that later…
I want to emphasize that this book will not be perfectly written. That’s not what I’m looking for in this venture. I am looking to help people. The things I will say throughout this book will make you say “…What?” or “well, I already do that. Why does it make you so happy?”… But you’ll figure it out. Trust me on that one.
I would just like to recognize one special person before I continue on. Charlotte Gemmell is a great friend of mine and one day, two or three years ago, she said, “Brian, you should write a book. It should be called ‘How To Be Merry’,”… She was kidding…
As a Junior in high school, you are required to take some pretty challenging courses, at least at my school. My morning was awful! I had precalc first period, AP U.S. History second period and AP Language Arts third. Naturally, at eight A.M., your brain is still in hibernation mode, working its way to battery conservation mode and it doesn’t truly “wake up” until lunch. In AP US History, we had a fantastic teacher! Her name is Ms. Grace and although her class was very labor intensive, we learned a lot and the work paid off for everyone. The thing is, everyone was just dead (figuratively). Nobody in the class was giving off GOOD VIBES. The most common complaint was “I got nooooo sleep last night……,” often preceded or followed by an extended yawn. This is a very “bad vibe” to give off. It shows that you are having a tough time with your studies, which can lead to bad grades which will definitely lead to stress. And trust me, there is no feeling worse than being completely stressed and there is no worse friend to have than one who is constantly stressed out, looking for someone to lay all of there problems on. Later on I will talk a little bit about stress and how I have dealt with it and what your body is trying to tell you when you are stressed (Disclaimer: I am not a doctor so I actually have no idea at all what your body is trying to tell you. But… I don’t know… Just keep reading…). AP Language Arts was an extremely difficult class. We had homework every night. And the same “bad vibes” were being given off: The complaints and sleepiness and everything else.
I luckily escaped this trauma with a few simple techniques! The first is that I would always try and hold the door open for someone as I entered those classes every day. It made me feel good to help someone even in the smallest way. And they would say “Thank you” and I would say “Oh! It was no problem at all!” and it would make my day just a little bit better. Even though everyone around me was still tired, I was as awake and cheerful as I would be on a hot day in the summer. Another very important piece to this is that I would make a point of smiling whenever I would have a conversation with someone. Even if they do not consciously look at your mouth and see you smiling, they will sense it subconsciously and it will make their day better.
I was the good vibes king and whether people liked it or not, I was always the happiest guy in the room. Whenever anyone would ask me how my day was going I would hardly ever say anything overly negative. The reason why is because I soaked up all of the positive things that happened to me, “I’m doing fantastic! Thanks for asking! This morning I woke up and saw that my mom had made me pancakes and it just made my day!” Now think about how the other person is going to feel, they will now subconsciously answer in a very positive way. People tend to conform to those around them for fear of being criticism or embarrassment of their differences. If you are happy and they are not, then they will naturally be drawn closer to the happy side of the spectrum.
Another very simple good vibes technique is to make small compliments. People love being complimented and it makes them feel good. They will then give off good vibes to the rest of the people around them. Even a small, “I like your shoes,” is all it takes for someone to feel good about themselves. “Oh you like my shoes? Well suddenly I don’t feel so tired anymore! I feel refreshed and happy!” (keep in mind that they won’t actually say anything remotely close to this, but that is what they will think and you will see it in their actions that they will feel more alive and happier). So I really suggest that you attempt some of these techniques the next time you feel even the slightest bit of sadness or more importantly if you sense some bad vibes coming from someone else.
One final note: did you notice how I didn’t mention first period as being all tired? The reason why is because the teacher was full of good vibes. Every Monday we would go over what people did over the weekend and it got us thinking about the fun times we had. He would always say good morning and he would joke around with us while he was teaching. It completely changed the way I would look at the day.
In this age of technology there is a lot of cyber bullying and teen suicide. How can someone be so heartless as to emotionally harm someone over the Internet? I have been bullied before in a multitude of ways. Probably the most disturbing was through a letter in the mail. The letter showed up in a bland envelope that had no return address. I thought it was quite strange. I opened the letter and it said that no one likes me and even my friends think I am just really stupid. Granted I was 14 at the time, going through puberty and all that. The letter didn’t emotionally faze me one single bit and there are a few reasons for that. First of all, I’m Merry… that’s a given. Second of all, I thought about what the person or people who wrote the letter might be thinking. They could possibly be going through some troubling times and maybe received a note like they sent me. Maybe it was just a group of bored people that thought it would be funny. Third, I was a mentally tough kid. And finally, I was in control.
Well the fact is I never found out who wrote the letter. Whoever it was, they failed at what they were trying to do.
I know that not everyone gets letters like this in the mail, but everyone hears a comment about himself or herself whether it is to their face or behind their back that is negative and meant to be hurtful. You must show mental stature and know that the reason why they are saying what they are saying is not because of you at all. It is because the person who made the comment has some sick need to make those comments.
In the end it’s only words and the words can’t physically harm you unless you physically harm yourself. Mental toughness is the key here. To have mental toughness means to be unaffected by outside factors. Bullies are simply outside factors. Just know that you are 100% satisfied with who you are and that no one will ever change how you feel about yourself for the worse. You must also keep in mind what you are in control of. You are in control of your own emotions; you are in control of what you do physically. You are NOT in control of what others say to you. So how you must handle a bully is: hear what they say, knowing that you have no control over it, and then stay emotionally and physically stable, knowing that you have full control over your emotions and actions.
Remember: Think about why ‘the bully’ bullies, Mental Toughness and YOU are in control.
Ever since I was a very young child my mother has always preached to
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