Tell me Who I Am (en) - Selia Ascrala (best books to read for self development .TXT) 📗

Maybe that was because I just cleaned Capone's cage. Anyway. I didn't want to leave. From our wonderful Australia to rainy England. Here it was sunny and warm. There not. Pissed, I stuck the green rusty shovel in my left hand in the soaked straw and snorted.

Let us make a few things clear: I'm Grace Lex Twyla -I wasn't very aroused by my name either, but could not alter it; namely, the grandmother of Mum was known as Twyla, and Lex.. well, Lex was the dramatically killed hamster of my father; strange, I know. Who names their child after a hamster which was run over into puree?

Right, my father.

No, what I was really intend-"Don't be so angry, Grace." Making a grimace I looked at our cooperative colorful parrot, who sat on the couch rest of our living room and watched me all this time. "Oh, Capone. If it only were that simple." I sighed cumbersomely and shoved the last bit of straw in the garbage bag, which I then knotted and placed outside the door of our apartment.

"You know, Capone, I didn't imagined my holidays like that", I said to my multicolored plumaged friend as I entered the living room again. Boxes were stacked in every corner, whether together or sequentially, and I also had no idea how my father wanted to get all that stuff on the other side of the world, but I assumed that it would be transported by trucks and ships, which would cost a fortune, however we wouldn't need to pay. Now you wonder how so, but that's another interesting story ... We couldn't even afford it anyway.

As I sat myself on the brown leather couch in order to recover from my exhausting thought, the door was being opened once again and my completely exhausted looking father entered the room and smiled cheerfully as he saw me. He wanted to come over to me, but didn't pay attention to the box in front of him and banged his knee with a loud thud against it. Yup, there had to be something hard in there. Once again it was a spectacular performance of my clumsy and lovable father.

Still, I was not in the mood of speaking well with him.

After he pulled himself together, he stood tall in front of me, his hands braced on the hips. If I didn't knew it better, I would think he was gay... I should really stop to think of such disturbing stuff in my head ...

"Grace Lex Twyla Pelley, you haven't moved an inch, what if I would be seriously injured?", he said to me, his fox-red hair glowed fiery of the translucent rays of the morning sun.

Here I was, looking at my father, whom I looked so alike. The same prominent cheekbones, the same lips-well, almost. Mine were fuller; and the same Irish-red hair. I hated it. It reminded me of juicy carrots which rabbits would like to eat immediately. And I didn't like rabbits. Since I had eaten one on Easter, - without knowing that it was a roasted rabbit might I add - and now I couldn't even look these tiny creatures in the eyes, but also it seemed to me, since then, as if they were watching me with hungry eyes... No wonder with my carrot-colored hair. But one thing I really inherited from my mother. This unquestionably wonderful emerald-colored eyes. Dads, however, were almost boring compared to mine. His irises were a mixture of brown-green colors.

With which he playfully glared at me now, but I wasn't in the mood for such games, so I just stared at him like a train, then he sighed in despair. "What's the matter with you, kid."

I furrowed my finely arched eyebrows. "You know exactly what's up, Dad."

"Can't you just understand it, she's the sister of your mother and I want to help her", he tried to explain, but I wouldn't let him.

"ADOPTIVE-sister, Dad. We don't even have the same blood line." I knew that sounded totally harsh and mean. I mean, if I would have had siblings, whether adopted or not, I would have loved them with all my heart. After all, I'd have grown up with them. But... I was taken away from here so reluctantly. Very reluctantly.

"Sweetie, she's having a tough time at the moment. And... and don't you at least want, for your mother's sake, to lend her sister a helping hand?"

"Mum's dead, she wouldn't even witness it" I whispered dejected, then looked to the side, that he tried to use this scam on me... I saw him going through his curly short hair with his right hand. Even more in common, thanks to him I had slight waves in my hair, but most of the time it didn't know what it wanted. I had my left-hand skills also from Mum, Dad was right-handed, but he had two left feet. Clearly. "We should hurry, or we'll miss the flight", he said to run off the ttopic. Well, two can play the game. "And in China a sack of rice just fell over. I don't want to leave! Leave me behind?" I asked, but I knew the answer before he told me. "Geez, Gracie. Stop nagging. You're also still a minor and can't be left alone by yourself." Oh, damn. This is the misfortune of still being 17. "Maura has also two sons and one is almost the same age as you. You'll certainly understand well with each other, Gracie."

I snorted for the second time that day. It was still morning and the sun had just begun to shine in. "They don't know me."

"Not true, he even mentioned you once, do you remember?"

If I remember?

Yes, and how! His exact words were: 'Australia is cool, I have a cousin who lives here.' I knew a different definition under 'knowing'...

I looked helplessly at my father, it made no sense anyway. "But... why do we have to move in with them?"

Dad exhaled a deep stressed breath and closed his eyes before he turned to Capone, who had been watching the play listening attentively. "I'm sorry, Grace. It's just... everything here reminds me of your mother. And Maura is going through a hard time, too. This is the opportunity for a fresh start. Once we've settled there, we move into our own apartment. But right now that just isn't possible and their larger estate is excellent. Primarily, she also offered us to move in with them in their estate." I stared at him stunned. "So you want to run away just like that? Hiding from Mum and all the beauty that is reminiscent of her?" My dearest father just looked at me sadly, put Capone to transport into the cage and then said. "It hurts" Shaking my head, I turned my head away from him, I needed fresh air for now. "I'm going out a little. Saying my last Goodbyes to my home," I mumbled, standing up. In the middle of the room I stopped. "Appleheart!," I shouted, but nothing came. "There are delicious baked apples!" From the corner of my eye I noticed a small movement and something black scurried quickly towards me. I looked at my beloved fat cat. The strange guy was totally in love with apples, I couldn't explain it myself. Which cat ate apples? But hey, he couldn't even meow, instead he barked!

I bent down to Appleheart at my feet and took him in my arms. The butterball was so fluffy and I wanted him with me one last time along the beach. And now, that I was just thinking of the beach, it occurred to me how much I would miss surfing. Although I couldn't surf like a professional but just to feel alone of flowing wind in my hair was always a reason to put me on this board.

At least it was something I could a little bitu. I got used to new things only very, very slowly. Otherwise, I was just Grace. A perfectly ordinary boring girl who had no talent. It had been here my only hobby. And when I was in England, everything would change. 'Who would I be then?', I thought.

'Just some girl who doesn't really know who she is.'

All this just because of my cousin. And soon I would share the same roof over my head with him. Him, the boy who at a time, when we were 10, had made my life hell here.


It was a sunny day when the little shy Grace Pelley was 10 years old. Her cousin, who came with his family from the UK to visit them during the holidays, found her on the beach, where she sat sadly with the yet 9 months old Appleheart in her lap. She had been sad because the small redhead had thought that everyone had forgotten her birthday. He had been strange on the beach and if it was up to Gracie, there wasn't something alright, but before she could ask him, he jumped up and went back home.

But the idea was quickly forgotten as Gracie opened the door and there were so many quantities of 'Happy Birthdays' thrown at her, that she could have cried of joy. She blinked, then ran to her mother, Dawn Pelley, who embraced her firmly. Many were present in the apartment, even almost all of her classmates and a few from neighboring classes with which Gracie understood herself well. They all smiled cheerfully at Gracie.

After the children had eaten the delicious strawberry cake, they wanted to go play outside with Gracie. Cute Gracie grabbed still her red sweater, which Dawn had knitted, because it was slowly becoming cold outside.

On the playground, which was mainly a giant sandpit, they were playing catch. Gracie just ran away from a catcher laughing, when she suddenly ran into someone. The one catched her with his hands on her shoulders, and as she looked up, she looked into the dark eyes of her cousin. Grace blushed a delicate shade of red and stammered an unintelligible excuse, but the next moment she was already in the sand and felt pain in her elbow, with whom she had caught herself.

He had pushed her.

She didn't understand what was wrong with him, why he was so rude to her. What had Gracie done to him? "Watch it where you're running, you ugly monster," he shouted irritably at Gracie, after which she began to breathe rapidly, her bags filling. It was like a slap in the face; he had been nice before.

"M-monster?," she squeaked out. Meanwhile, the others had gathered around the two and watched silently. The brunette looked disgusted at Gracie.

"Yes, Monster. Who wants to be friends with something like you, that's embarrassing! Just look at this kinky red hair, like scruffy carrots! This granny cardigan or your disgusting like elephantsnot looking eyes! Just never touch me again! " He bent down, took a handful of sand and threw it at the terrified Gracie.

"Come on, guys, you too! Or are you also such a Loser?" He asked in the round, which had begun to whisper, in his testimony, however, hastily shook their heads negatively and also begun to threw sand from around the tortured Gracie.

Gracie got sand in