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Em.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I Know What You're Thinking.

 

When the police got there, I had long since fallen silent. Logan answered every question he could while they bandaged him up and asked him the routine questions about his head, and they couldn't get a word out of me. Even Logan tried to get me to speak - stroking my face, brushing the hair from my eyes, speaking to me in a soft tone. I was more of a statue than a functioning human at that moment. I remembered Logan helping me stand, practically carrying me over to the cop car where he slid me in and then followed after. I stayed tucked under his arm for the rest of the journey, cradled to his side. 

I remembered the cops up front speaking worriedly about Victor, wondering what he'd gotten himself into. That's right - they all knew him. The realization only made me feel worse. I'd gotten their chief kidnapped. 

And the next thing I knew I was sitting at the station, eyes staring at the floor without really seeing it. I was so lost that it took a moment to realize that someone was speaking to me. And even when I heard them, I simply looked up, a slow and sluggish movement that seemed to take every ounce of my concentration to complete, and met their eyes. My recognition was faint but familiar. Glen.

"Hey, Jane," He murmured, eyebrows knitted as he greeted me with the kindest voice I'd ever heard him use. "I'd like to ask you some questions. Do you think you can answer them for me?"

The fact that he'd become so familiar with me - that all of my escapades in the past and all of my acts of rebellion had actually made us friends in a sense - hit me hard for some reason. The fact that he cared enough to speak to me like this even though both of us knew that I was the reason Victor wasn't here right now, even though I'd been nothing but trouble in the past, was what caused my face to crumble and for small whimpers to quickly escalate into sobs. My head dropped into my hands and in front of this lone cop that had always found my attempts at being a total asshole hilarious, I felt more vulnerable than I ever had. His hand dropped onto my arm as he patted me without words. 

I wept for all of the stress that had been building up for years. I wept for all of the heartbreak I had to endure, all of the confusion and loneliness that followed Dad's disappearance, all of the times I got drunk just so I could be that rebellious girl everyone knew me as. I wept for Victor's love for me, and Logan's, I wept for the situation at hand, I wept for my family and all of the shit I put them through. I think I apologized about eight times.

But then, I lifted my head, sniffled pathetically for a minute as I wiped my eyes with my arm, and looked at Glen with a red nose and bloodshot eyes. 

"Okay," I sniffed, as he dropped his hand. "I'm good."

***

"I didn't see their faces - they had ski masks on." I replied, leaning forward in my chair as Glen and his colleague, David sat with elbows on the table and their hands under their chins. Like two weird twins who had nothing in common accept they wore the same clothes and had similar mannerisms. 

Glen sighed, "Well, that rules out a lineup. Did you get a look at the car?"

Again, I shook my head. "No, after he knocked Logan out I wasn't able to move. Any sudden moves would have ended up with Victor dead on the floor, anyway," Even I was frustrated at my lack of information.

"You said they spoke to you," David spoke up, releasing one hand to point at me, "What did they say?"

This was the question I dreaded. I hoped to God that Logan, who was being interrogated in the next room, had been unconscious for this part. 

"That this was payback for my...resistance," I lied, focusing on that damned muscle in my eyebrow to make sure it didn't move an inch. "That if I don't want anyone else to turn out like Victor that I should cooperate with Ike."

"Nothing about a hostage? Nothing that denoted that they would keep him alive?" Glen cut in, his hand laying flat on the table as he stared into my eyes.

Looking at his desperate expression, I could feel the guilt claw at me as I ripped away all hope he had with one single word, "No."

The word was believable. It was weak and faint and my voice wavered as it was coming out of my mouth. I didn't want to lie, but I had no choice. If Ike found out I'd told the police about this...Victor would be dead for real. I and I alone had to go through with this. I would fix what I'd broken. The cops would be keeping an eye on me but that didn't matter much - I'd get away. Glen leaned back with lips pressed into a thin line. He looked past me at the mirrored wall, and simply stared for a long time. David stared at the table for a while, and I knew both of them were taking in what this meant. The guilt clawed at my chest and my heart hadn't stopped with it's ragged beating since I'd decided to lie. 

"I'm sorry," I whispered, unable to say much more as I looked away in shame.

"You did nothing wrong, Jane," Glen murmured, his gaze turning back to me. "You did well, telling us all of this. Thank you."

And the guilt tore a hole in my chest. His gaze was cold and disconnected. He was trying to keep his composure as a member of Victor's police force. Trying not to lose whatever dignity Victor had maintained. 

I'll kill them.

An intake of breath from Glen made me look up, and he let it out in a sigh. "You did good, Jane. Thank you for your cooperation."

He stood up along with Daniel, and I followed their lead, as Glen gestured to the mirror, and a second later the door opened. Another policemen walked in and took me by the arm, leading me with a gentle hand out of the room. I didn't look up as I heard Logan's soft voice. He must have finished before me. That made me feel a bit more hopeful. Maybe he had less to say - maybe he was unconscious for most of it.

"Oh, Jane!" I did look up when a very familiar voice gasped my name.

Laury rushed towards me from where she stood with Logan, and as soon as she reached me she wrapped her arms around me in a warm embrace. I didn't respond as she squeezed me, a little confused as to why she could even stand to touch me in the first place.

"You've gone through so much, Jane," Laury murmured in my ear, rubbing my back, "I'm so sorry."

"Sorry...?" I mumbled, lifting my hands to Laury's arms. "What...,"

I pushed away from Laury, angry for some reason, though not knowing why. Her hands fluttered in confusion when I shrugged away from her, earnest eyes questioning me.

"Sorry? Why are you apologizing to me? Why does everyone treat me like I'm--like I deserve some kind of...," I trailed off, my hands balling into fists as they pressed against my temples, the guilt inside clawing at me like some trapped animal. 

"Like I didn't get Victor into this mess!" I finally snapped, breath hitching and catching as I felt the anger that was rolling through me come to a head. This was anger at myself, but I was taking it out on them. It only made me feel worse, but I couldn't stop.

"I'm the one who brought Ike here, and," I swallowed a sob, as I backed away from Laury's hand that reached out for me again, "I'm the one who brought him into your lives and I'm the one who wasn't able to stop him!" 

Logan took a step forward as I abruptly squatted to the ground, running my hands through my hair. But I didn't pay attention to him, tears spilling over once again as I once again realized how helpless I was in this situation. I wanted to kill those men, but with Victor in their hands I was truly powerless. One false move and Victor really was as good as dead. The only thing I could do was get away. I had to go get him by myself. Even if that meant giving myself up. As far as I was concerned, Victor's life was far more important than whatever dignity I still had. I wondered how I could have been so stupid as to think that I could actually get away from Ike. It was only a matter of time before he took someone that I cared about. He went right for the heart when he took Victor, and he knew it.

I was done waiting for the next Victim to be taken from me. He wanted me? He had me.

Warm hands fell over the ones I'd splayed over my cheeks, and my eyes looked through my fingers, expecting Logan's face. Instead, I found Kent. My brother's eyes bored into mine. Kent and I were extremely similar. Black hair, brown eyes. We were taken as twins at times, even though he was a year older. We were also extreme dorks. But in that moment I saw a side of Kent that I hadn't seen since the first night that Dad disappeared. A gaze that was so painfully familiar to me, yet I'd only seen it once before. He had been holding Mom as she rocked on the floor, crying when the news came of what Dad had done. He'd said he got a promotion. He'd explained away the extra income with such confident lies that no one suspected anything. All of the extra trips, everything...it just made it hurt worse when the truth came out.

Kent's eyes were the same, cold and angry, and yet so tender that you felt like you would break under his gaze. Such a mixture of emotion that made me terrified of what thoughts were running through his head. Because in that moment, I knew with perfect clarity what he was thinking. I was thinking it too. 

"Jane," He breathed, pulling my hands from my face with gentle fingers and then letting his palms settle on my cheeks, thumbs stroking the skin next to my ear as he treated me as though I would dissipate under his touch. "I know what you're thinking, and I won't let you."

My mouth screwed up as more tears blurred my vision, trying not to let out the sobs that desperately pushed at my throat. He knew that I couldn't speak, so he simply pulled me close, settling on his knees as he wrapped his arms around me. He pressed his face into my shoulder, holding me tighter than I think he ever has, even when I left that time in Florida.

"Jane, do you have any idea how worried we were?" He mumbled into my shoulder, "Do you know

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