LITTLE GIRL LOST - SARAH BETH LEE (tharntype novel english .TXT) 📗

your way of rebelling against everything that you missed out on.”

Hannah was dropping the blood on her meter and avoiding eye contact with Maddie. She watched the screen and sighed as she saw the number 95 appear on the screen. She removed the strip and placed the meter back in the case. She smiled at Maddie’s expectant face.

“It’s 95 so that’s good considering how high it was all night. By the way thanks for babysitting me last night.” Hannah removed her meds and swallowed them with a gulp of diet coke before taking her shot; the joys of being a juvenile diabetic.

“Hannah I’m glad you’re ok. I know how horrible you must be feeling.”

Hannah nodded as she picked up her toast. “Last night was not my best moment. I feel kind of groggy and my head is still pounding.”

Maddie laughed, “I’m sure but it’ll pass.” Maddie drank her coffee and watched Hannah over the rim of her cup. She looked a little pale but honestly she didn’t look that bad considering how much she had to drink the previous night. Maddie knew she had questions but she didn’t want to rush her, she would ask about Nick when she was ready.

Hannah pushed her empty plate away and played at drinking her soda. She opened the paper to the crossword puzzle and began to fill in the blanks. Maddie laughed beside her.

“H, you’re the only person I know who does the crossword in ink. What if you mess up?”

Hannah focused on the tiny print that was wrecking havoc on her already splitting headache. “I don’t mess up.”

Maddie knew that was true but Hannah sounded so sure of herself. She had always been so reserved and she wondered what had happened to change that.

“So what are your plans for the day?”

Hannah shrugged. ”Plans are highly overrated. Besides Thanksgiving is the day after tomorrow so I gave everyone the rest of the week off. I may go down to the store later and give Jeff a hand. What about you what have you got going on?”

Maddie smiled, “I have a couple of appointments this afternoon and then I’m taking the rest of the week off as well. You know you could come with me to moms for Thanksgiving dinner.”

Hannah thought that sounded like a great idea but she knew that Veronica would never allow it. She may not like Hannah but she would at least expect her to make an appearance for the holiday. Hannah wondered who she would invite this year. She cringed at the thought of a bunch of pretentious, stuffy full of themselves doctors, lawyers, politicians and trust fund babies.

“Mad, you have no idea how wonderful that sounds but I have to go to Veronica’s but maybe I can swing by for dessert I would love a piece of your mom’s pecan pie.” Hannah could see the look of concern on Maddie’s face. “I know what you’re going to say but I only have dessert three times a year my birthday, Thanksgiving and Christmas so cut me some slack.”

Maddie knew she was right and she wondered what it would be like to have to be so careful all the time and watch everything you ate for fear of what the consequences might be. Hannah had such discipline she followed a strict regimen of diet, exercise and she took her meds faithfully every day.

“What time are you going to Veronica’s?”

Hannah hadn’t talked to Veronica since her birthday last month so she had no idea. “I need to call her and see what time she is having dinner. I am guessing it will be at 2pm.”

Maddie nodded, “Well mom will have lunch at noon but we’ll be too stuffed to eat dessert for a couple of hours so just come by when you can get away and we’ll have dessert with you. So do you have any other plans for the holiday?”

Hannah hadn’t given much thought to the day so she had no other plans. “No the holidays are always hard and I don’t want to deal with anything after spending an hour with Veronica. Spending the afternoon with you and your family will be just what I need after the lunch from hell.”

Maddie looked at Hannah with sympathy, “Well we can be thankful that we have good friends and a warm place like mom’s to recuperate.”

Hannah agreed she had never felt more at home or more like a kid than when she had been at Maddie’s house. She had often pretended that Maddie’s mom was her mother too. Mrs. Jacobs was the perfect mom she was warm and friendly she always had a smile on her face. She took pride in Maddie and attended all of her activities. She was exactly what a mother should be.

“Maddie can I ask you a question?”

“H, you can ask me anything.”

Hannah looked at her hands and spoke softly. “Mad tell me about Nick. I mean I saw his picture in the file and I read the article but how is any of this possible? How did his family die in the same accident as my dad but when I met him at the funeral he wasn’t a nine year old boy. Maddie how is it he’s the same age now as he was back then?”

Maddie could see the sadness in Hannah’s eyes and the traces of hope. “Nick works for the pentagon so that’s how he ended up at my office. He is kind of like you in the fact that he’s a genius whose specialty is time travel.” Maddie watched Hannah’s face as her words hit her full force.

“Maddie are you serious? He traveled back in time to that specific day? Do you think he even realized that the day he landed on was the day his family was buried and my dad’s wake? “

Maddie honestly didn’t know, “I don’t know H but for whatever reason he ended up there at the precise moment. Maybe it was fate or maybe it was a fluke but he ended up there none the less.”

Hannah found it hard to believe he just happened along on that day by accident. Why would he have chosen to revisit a day that had been so painful for him? Had he wanted to find someone to blame and all he found was her? Had he known who she was? She had more questions than answers but she knew that no matter what the answer was they would both be hurt in the end. She was used to being hurt but she could feel her heart breaking a little more at the thought of Nick suffering because of her.

“Maddie I am sure that he will hate me when he figures out who I am.”

Maddie wasn’t sure about that but she could see that no matter what she said Hannah had her mind set. “H, why do you think Nick will hate you? How is any of what happened that day your fault?”

Hannah could feel the tears pooling in her eyes and threatening to spill over at any moment. She angrily swiped the traitorous tears away. “Maddie everything that happened that day was my fault.”

Maddie knew Hannah had always blamed herself but Maddie had never understood why. She had tried desperately to talk to Hannah about it but she had refused to talk about anything remotely related to that day. “Hannah please talk to me; I want to help but you have to talk to me.”

Hannah sat in the silence and wondered how it would feel to say the words out loud the words that had left the bitter hollow place where her heart had once been. The words that had brought such pain to those around her and caused her to give up on a life that had never began.

“That day was the worst day of my life.” Hannah paused and looked at the floor. “Dad was supposed to be spending the day with me but at the last minute he got a phone call and had to leave for a meeting. I was angry and hurt especially when he wouldn’t even let me go with him; he always took me to the office and let me stay in his office while he ran the meeting. I was so upset I flew up the stairs to my room and slammed the door. He tried to coax me to open the door but I refused. I remember yelling at him telling him to just leave. I had been feeling out of sorts a lot that summer and that day I didn’t eat because I felt sick at my stomach all day. I thought it was because I felt guilty for how ugly I had behaved with dad but it was more than that. I had locked myself in my room and lay down in the floor and that was the last thing I remembered the next thing I knew I was at the hospital.”

Hannah was wiping the tears that were now freely flowing down her pale cheeks. She looked at Maddie knowing she didn’t understand the significance of that day. She drew in a shaky breath and continued with her story.

“I woke up in the emergency room with tubes hooked up to me and an IV dripping fluid in my arm. I was scared and all I wanted was my daddy. I was screaming and pulling at the tubes several nurses and an orderly hurried into the cubicle along with Veronica. She stopped by my bed and told me to calm down that dad was on his way. I tried to listen but I never took my eyes off the door as I waited for my dad but he never came. I was so hurt and I told Veronica that I didn’t care what his excuse was I was never going to talk to him ever again as long as he lived. I swear Maddie those were the exact words that I said. I found out later that he was rushing to the hospital to see me when he was killed in the accident. If I had done one thing different that day if I had eaten instead of sulking in the bedroom or if I had gone with him none of it would have happened. If I hadn’t been at the hospital he would have never been on the parkway that day at that time. I am the reason that he and all those other people died. If he had known that I was okay that he didn’t have to hurry maybe he wouldn’t have been there but he never knew that I was ok he never knew I was diagnosed with diabetes that day. I feel so bad for the angry words I said to him that day and for never being able to take it all back.”

Maddie held Hannah as the tears poured and she cried for what she had thought was her fault. Maddie knew that Hannah had needed someone to blame but it had really been a terrible accident.