LITTLE GIRL LOST - SARAH BETH LEE (tharntype novel english .TXT) 📗

house.

Hannah cut the shower short and climbed out. She wrapped the warm towel under her arms and around her slim waist before she walked back to the bedroom. She sat on the bed and ran her lotion covered hands over her legs and arms before pulling on her undergarments. She wasn’t sure why but for some reason she wanted to look nice today and to feel well sexy and that was something she never thought about. She wanted to feel confident and she knew that the Victoria Secret lingerie would help with that even if she was the only one who would ever see the sexy black lace bra and panty set hidden under her clothes. She walked to the closet and looked at all her boring clothes and wished she had went shopping for a new dress as well as the lacy undergarments. She moved the clothes around and finally settled for a Marc Jacobs hand knit sweater in a lovely shade of green that brought out the flicks of emerald in her eyes. She slipped it on and then decided to go with a pair of khaki slacks. She rummaged around in the bottom of her closet for her Kate Spade shoes and handbag. She really wasn’t trying to impress anybody but herself. Besides knew Veronica would send her upstairs to change in to something more suitable to the occasion.

Hannah looked in the mirror and decided it was as good as it gets. She walked to the bathroom and applied makeup and blew her hair dry. She added loose curls to her short hair for dramatic effect. She turned in front of the full length mirror and decided it was time to go. She turned the light off and grabbed her medicine bag, cell and handbag.

Hannah pulled the door closed behind her as she stepped out of the apartment and headed to the elevator. She needed to pickup flowers for Veronica and Kathleen Jacobs. Hannah held her head up high and tried to remind herself that it was Thanksgiving and that she did have a lot to be thankful for. She felt a single tear escape her eye as she thought of her father and their Thanksgiving tradition of pancakes and bacon at midnight stuffing themselves and then no food until dinner with the family the next the day. She smiled as she thought of all the good times she had to hold on to. Somehow she managed to breathe in and out before her fear and anxiety took over and forced her to run back down the hall to the safety of her apartment. She had hidden from the real world for too long and it was time she grew up.

Hannah walked the short distance to the elevator and waited as the door slid open. She stepped inside and watched the door close soundlessly in front of her. She stood in the confines of the elevator that suddenly seemed far too small and she wondered why she had never made friends with any of her neighbors. She saw the older man from 9Gstanding with his hand lovingly on his wife’s elbow and she wished she knew who they were. She had lived in this apartment building for seven years and she didn’t know a single person other than Carson and Mackenzie but they owned the building so they didn’t really count.

As the elevator door slid open the gray-haired man held his hand out for Hannah to exit. He and his wife fell in step behind her.

“Happy Thanksgiving Ms Roberts.”

Hannah looked up in surprise as the kind eyes of the older man smiled at her. “Same to you, but I am so sorry I don’t know your name.”

He waved off her apology. “I am Marcus Jamison and this is my wife of thirty plus year Vera. I hope you have a wonderful holiday.”

Hannah smiled. “Thanks you too.”

She watched as they walked hand in hand out of the building and in to a waiting taxi. She stared out the door and waited as her car pulled to the curb. She hurried outside as the bitter fall air whipped around her and ruffled her Burbury coat. She smiled at the valet and climbed behind the wheel and wondered what lay ahead of her. Hannah was almost afraid to imagine who was attending Veronica’s Thanksgiving dinner.

As the city disappeared in her rear view mirror she realized she needed a distraction from what was yet to come. She watched the trees and fields flying outside her window and she found her thoughts turning to Nick. She could see his electric blue eyes and windblown hair falling casually across his brow as if he were posing for GQ magazine. She could almost see his cocky smile and she wondered what his voice would sound like; would it sound like warm honey dripping off his tongue with every word he spoke or would it be strong and confident, or would it be a sexy, sultry drawl that made her want to know him better, much better? She smiled at the thought of how much she wanted to know him. She wondered if he would even be able to look at her when he learned the truth about her past and why he had ended up at that exact place on that precise day that he met her. She shivered at the thought of never knowing him or the bitterness that would be like venom to her soul when he told her he hated her. She swiped at her eyes as the tears threatened to fall. She drew a shaky breath and knew that a life without him would be no life at all. She wasn’t sure how or why but she loved him and she was afraid he would never know just how much.

Hannah pulled off the highway to the subdivision where Veronica lived. All the richest and most influential people lived here at Meadow Brook Estates. She knew she was in no shape to face Veronica or anyone else who might be waiting behind those heavy Mahogany doors. She pulled to the gate and pushed the button to have Charles buzz her in. She was feeling so out of sorts and so sentimental, what was going on with her today? The more she looked inside of herself the more she realized that the memories of her dad weren’t there anymore. She woke up every day in her familiar bed, in her worn plaid pajamas just as she had the day before and yet with each passing day she struggled to remember the timber of her father’s voice, the sound of his jovial laughter and the feel of his warm lips on her cheek as he kissed her goodnight. She could feel the sobs climbing up her throat and she wished she could scream but when she tried nothing came out. She looked at her childhood home and she knew that all her happy memories were just that and now this was just a shell, a house that would never be a home ever again.

Hannah forced herself to climb out of the car and put one foot in front of the other. As she neared the door she stopped and closed her eyes. She felt so alone and so afraid that she was losing her dad forever. Everyone had told her that he would always be with her and that she would have her memory of him to hold on to but the harder life got the farther away he seemed to be. She was afraid that she was changing and that with that she was losing him more each day. How was it possible that she couldn’t remember what his favorite ice-cream was or how he liked his coffee? He was almost a stranger to her now and she realized she had never known who he was. She knew him as her daddy but he had died before she knew him as a man. She could feel the tears falling down her face and she wished she were at home in the safety of her bedroom away from prying eyes and nosy people. She turned on one heel to leave but the door opened behind her and she heard Veronica calling her name.

“Hannah, please don’t leave.”

Veronica’s voice drifted along the cool November air and she sounded almost as bad as Hannah felt. She turned and saw that Veronica was standing in the door with her arms wrapped around her waist, clutching a heavy cardigan sweater around her stomach. Hannah could see the tracks that trailed down her cheeks were tears had fallen. She looked as if she might break down at any moment. Hannah walked back to the door and followed her in.

“Veronica has something happened? Tell me what’s wrong?”

Veronica pulled a tissue out of her pocket and blew her nose. “No nothing has happened at least not today. I suppose I am just feeling sentimental.”

Hannah was surprised to see that the house was empty. “Veronica what’s going on? Am I early?”

Veronica took Hannah’s hand and led her to the front parlor. She sat down on the davenport and took a deep breath. “I didn’t invite anyone this year; it’s just me and you kid.”

Hannah looked surprised and wondered exactly what was going on. She had never known Veronica to cancel a dinner or a party. “Okay so why exactly did you cancel?”

Veronica dried her eyes and watched Hannah as she sat beside her so fragile yet strong. She knew that Hannah had always been stronger than she realized and she wished that she had been there for her all these years instead of hiding from her own grief and now guilt.

“Hannah first I want to apologize to you for being so hard on you and treating you so badly. You will never know how truly sorry I am for that. I am becoming an old woman and I no longer feel the need to pretend that I am still young or that my life is exactly as I wanted it to be. In fact my life is nothing like I expected or planned on it to be.”

Hannah could hear the guilt and the remorse in her words and she wondered what any of this had to do with her. Veronica had never made it a secret that she didn’t want children or that she despised Hannah. When her father had died she had sent her away to live with her Aunt rather than deal with her herself.

“Veronica please there’s no need for this. I promise you that you have nothing to be sorry for.”

Veronica shook her head and squeezed Hannah’s hand. “Please I need to tell you the truth and I hope you will forgive me. When I met your father I thought he was charming and beautiful but I didn’t love him at least not at first. I knew he was from a good family and that he and I would be a good match. As you know my parents were from old money and if I had to marry rich I at least