The Unconscious Journey - Kristina Laurentz (classic literature books .txt) 📗

The Unconscious Journey

The smell of the room was nauseating. It felt like I was outside of my body, floating around and watching everything happen in slow motion. As I sat on the edge of the table, my mind went blank. Had this really happened? I felt nothing. I was totally and completely numb. I heard the door knob turn slowly. A woman in hospital scrubs came into the room. She was accompanied by another woman in a police officers uniform. The woman with the hospital scrubs began to speak to me, but I didn't really hear what she was saying. Her voice sounded muffled. When I didn't answer her, (I knew she asked a question by her body language and facial expressions), it was like she knew I couldn't speak.

She moved toward me and lightly touched my shoulder, gently pressing on it for me to lie down. Both of the women had a look of such sorrow and empathy. I knew what they expected of me. I placed my feet into the cold, metal, outstretched arms at the end of the table. I knew the woman in hospital scrubs was getting samples from me because she kept placing large cotton swabs into a tube and laying it on a tray. I could not feel anything…no pain…nothing at all. As I lay there, all I could do was stare at the small, brownish green circle of a ceiling panel that had been violated by some kind of liquid. Violated…Violated…Violated. That was the only word that filled my mind.

Finally, after what seemed like hours, the woman in the hospital scrubs took my feet out of the metal arms and helped me sit up. As I started to ease myself off of the papered table, she held up a finger, motioning me to wait. The police officer left the room and came back in with a large camera. With a empathetic look, she said "sorry" to me. I didn't hear her, but I knew what she said. The woman in the hospital scrubs removed my gown. When she did, both women looked at me with such horror, such pity. The officer started taking photos of my naked body. Click, Flash…Click, Flash…Click, Flash. Every flash the camera let off, a different image flooded my mind. The images didn't go together like frames of a movie. They were jumbled, out of order, and in incomplete pieces…a man's face…a wall…a clock…a pair of cowboy boots.

The officer handed me a pair of navy blue sweats. My mind was beginning to un-fog. She told me to put them on because she had to keep my clothes for evidence. She told me to let her know when I was dressed so she could come in and talk to me for a while. As I was putting on the sweats, I turned and saw a person in the mirror that was on the wall next to the sink. A person I could not recognize. I raised my hand and slowly, timidly, touched the image in the mirror. Just as slowly, I took my hand off of the image and placed it on my face. I stood there in complete shock and horror. That was me in the mirror. I looked down at my body. I touched the places that were sewn together like a rag doll that had been torn apart by the family dog. I moved to the places that were bandaged. The dressings were stained with crimson red. Then, I slowly moved to the places that were discolored with an almost black tint. They felt hot, like your skin does after you get a sunburn, and I could feel the liquid building up inside them. I had to get dressed. I had to cover my exposed body. I just couldn't handle seeing myself anymore. I couldn't handle it anymore, emotionally or physically. The pain was starting to register in my brain. It was hard to breathe, hard to move, and hard to think.

The officer knocked on the wooden door and asked if she could come in. I told her it was ok in a very shaky, scared, quiet voice. She opened the door and closed it behind her. She sat in the chair that was up against the wall. She started asking me questions. All I could do was remember the jumbled, out of order, incomplete flashes of images. The last thing I remember was her saying the word "violated", then my world went black…and silent.

I had no idea where I was. I was no longer in the emergency room. I had to squint my eyes because the light was so incredibly bright. There was a kind of warmth that radiated from it, but it was unlike any thing I had ever felt. Every inch of my body, inside and out, was filled with a comforting and unexplainable wave of warmth. It was kind of like being submerged in a pool of water. The temperature was specifically calibrated for the exact temperature my body desires, seeping through my pores to equally comfort and warm my insides. It took me several minutes for my eyes and body to adjust to my new surroundings. I reached up to take my glasses off so I could rub my eyes. They were a bit sensitive and watery from the light that was beaming onto my body. There were no glasses on my face. How could this be? I can see perfectly without any aid from modern technology. This was getting a little weird…what do I mean ’getting’? This IS weird, but surprisingly I was unafraid.

I began to survey all of my surroundings and use all my senses to ascertain where I was and what was happening to me. I started with my body. I felt my face and hair. My face felt very smooth. There was not a wrinkle or blemish to be felt. Its texture was as soft as a baby rabbit’s fur. My hair felt like finely woven silk without a single tangle or knot to be found. My hands felt exactly like the skin on my face; smooth, without wrinkles, and most importantly there was absolutely no pain or stiffness. I can’t remember the last time I felt no pain in the joints or no swelling in the tissues of my hands. I continued my survey. I was clothed in what seemed to be a dense fog. It was almost as if I were wearing a dress made of clouds. When I moved my arms and legs or twisted at the waist, the ‘fog’ followed my every move. My feet were naked. I did not have on socks or any covering what so ever, which is strange in and of its self. I am never without something on my feet such as socks, slippers, or shoes. I can’t stand to have what ever ground I am standing on touching my feet. I noticed that my feet felt the same as my hands, no swelling or pain. Actually, my entire body felt no pain what so ever. I felt…fantastic! I must be dreaming or…dead. I moved my thoughts away from my physical being and began to study my surroundings. I was standing on some sort of cobblestone road. The stones were as smooth as glass and every one was exactly the same size and color…gold. Surprisingly, the road was neither hot or cold. It was the same temperature as the blanket of warmth that surrounded my entire being. There seemed to be a ‘drop off’ on the left and right side of the road. I peeked over the edge of the road but could not see any sign of an ending or bottom. Again, I was not afraid. I turned around to see what was behind me. Nothing. There was nothing but a solid wall of fog. I slowly put my hand against the fog to see if I could penetrate it. It was useless. This was very puzzling to me. It was fog so my hand should have been able to pass through it with ease. To my astonishment, it was as solid as a brick wall. I turned around to face the front of me. There was another wall of fog. I began to get nervous. Was I stuck in this very spot for all eternity? I reached out for the wall in front of me expecting to feel exactly what I felt behind me. Another surprise awaited me. My hand passed through it as smooth as a knife slicing through butter. I turned my attention to my olfactory senses. I closed my eyes and took a few short breaths through my nose. I smelt nothing. Literally nothing. There was no smell of air pollutants, dust, chemicals, food, or any other odor you usually smell during every day occurrences. The air was so incredibly clean. I opened my eyes and realized I was feeling an urge, an urge to walk forward into the misty unknown.

This urge was so strong. It took over every feeling, every want, and every desire. I had to know what was waiting for me out there. I knew, by instinct I suppose, that there was someone or something waiting for me…calling for me…summoning me. I took a step forward. Then another. With each step the force that was pulling me became stronger and made me feel like I had to get to where the supernatural force was in a hurry. I picked up the pace and began to jog. Another strange feeling came over me. As I was jogging, I never got winded or tired. I just felt a sense of excitement and anticipation, just as a child does while waiting for Santa Clause to come on Christmas Eve. I also noticed that with every step the fog moved with me keeping me contained in a box like area. My surroundings never looked as if they were changing. It was just me, the golden cobblestone road beneath my feet, and the walls of fog on every side. I had a million one questions running through my head as I jogged. Questions like “Am I dead?”, “Is this Heaven?”, “Am I alone?”. Suddenly, I came to a screeching halt, not because I was about to run into something, but it was a overwhelming feeling that I needed to stop exactly where I was. I asked myself, “why do I need to stop right here?”. My answer became very clear.

A figure parted the fog in front of me and slowly glided towards me. It stopped just a couple of feet from me. I couldn’t tell if it was a man or a woman, adult or child, human or beast. It had no real shape at all. It had the consistency of very thick fog and it had a brilliant yellow light around it like an aura. There was a sense of peace, contentment, and an overabundance of love emitting from it. Instantly, I fell down on my knees and bowed my head down to the road. I was very still and silent. I instantly felt such love, respect, honor, and