Stalky & Co. - Rudyard Kipling (ebooks children's books free TXT) š
- Author: Rudyard Kipling
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āWhew! What a place! Talk of natural history; this is it,ā said Stalky, filling himself a pipe. āIsnāt it scrumptious? Good old sea!ā He spat again approvingly, and was silent.
McTurk and Beetle had taken out their books and were lying on their stomachs, chin in hand. The sea snored and gurgled; the birds, scattered for the moment by these new animals, returned to their businesses, and the boys read on in the rich, warm, sleepy silence.
āHullo, hereās a keeper,ā said Stalky, shutting āHandley Crossā cautiously, and peering through the jungle. A man with a gun appeared on the sky-line to the east. āConfound him, heās going to sit down.ā
āHeād swear we were poachinā, too,ā said Beetle. āWhatās the good of pheasantsā eggs? Theyāre always addled, too.ā
āMight as well get up to the wood, I think,ā said Stalky. āWe donāt want G. M. Dabney, Col., J.P., to be bothered about us so soon. Up the wuzzy and keep quiet! He may have followed us, you know.ā
Beetle was already far up the tunnel. They heard him gasp indescribably: there was the crash of a heavy body leaping through the furze.
āAie! yeou little red rascal. I see yeou!ā The keeper threw the gun to his shoulder, and fired both barrels in their direction. The pellets dusted the dry stems round them as a big fox plunged between Stalkyās legs, and ran over the cliff-edge.
They said nothing till they reached the wood, torn, disheveled, hot, but unseen.
āNarrow squeak,ā said Stalky. āIāll swear some of the pellets went through my hair.ā
āDid you see him?ā said Beetle. āI almost put my hand on him. Wasnāt he a wopper! Didnāt he stink! Hullo, Turkey, whatās the matter? Are you hit?ā
McTurkās lean face had turned pearly white; his mouth, generally half open, was tight shut, and his eyes blazed. They had never seen him like this save once in a sad time of civil war.
āDo you know that that was just as bad as murder?ā he said, in a grating voice, as he brushed prickles from his head.
āWell, he didnāt hit us,ā said Stalky. āI think it was rather a lark. Here, where are you going?ā
āIām going up to the house, if there is one,ā said McTurk, pushing through the hollies. āI am going to tell this Colonel Dabney.ā
āAre you crazy? Heāll swear it served us jolly well right. Heāll report us. Itāll be a public lickinā. Oh, Turkey, donāt be an ass! Think of us!ā
āYou fool!ā said McTurk, turning savagely. āDāyou suppose Iām thinkinā of us? Itās the keeper.ā
āHeās cracked,ā said Beetle, miserably, as they followed. Indeed, this was a new Turkeyāa haughty, angular, nose-lifted Turkeyāwhom they accompanied through a shrubbery on to a lawn, where a white-whiskered old gentleman with a cleek was alternately putting and blaspheming vigorously.
āAre you Colonel Dabney?ā McTurk began in this new creaking voice of his.
āIāI am, andāā his eyes traveled up and down the boyāāwhoāwhat the devil dāyou want? Yeāve been disturbing my pheasants. Donāt attempt to deny it. Ye neednāt laugh at it.ā (McTurkās not too lovely features had twisted them. selves into a horrible sneer at the word pheasant.) āYouāve been birdsā-nesting. You neednāt hide your hat. I can see that you belong to the College. Donāt attempt to deny it. Ye do! Your name and number at once, sir. Ye want to speak to meāEh? You saw my notice-boards? Must have. Donāt attempt to deny it. Ye did! Damnable, oh damnable!ā
He choked with emotion. McTurkās heel tapped the lawn and he stuttered a littleātwo sure signs that he was losing his temper. But why should he, the offender, be angry?
āLo-look here, sir. Doādo you shoot foxes? Because, if you donāt, your keeper does. Weāve seen him! I do-donāt care what you call usābut itās an awful thing. Itās the ruin of good feelinā among neighbors. A ma-man ought to say once and for all how he stands about preservinā. Itās worse than murder, because thereās no legal remedy.ā McTurk was quoting confusedly from his father, while the old gentleman made noises in his throat.
āDo you know who I am?ā he gurgled at last; Stalky and Beetle quaking.
āNo, sorr, nor do I care if ye belonged to the Castle itself. Answer me now, as one gentleman to another. Do ye shoot foxes or do ye not?ā
And four years before Stalky and Beetle had carefully kicked McTurk out of his Irish dialect! Assuredly he had gone mad or taken a sunstroke, and as assuredly he would be slaināonce by the old gentleman and once by the Head. A public licking for the throe was the least they could expect. Yetāif their eyes and ears were to be trustedāthe old gentleman had collapsed. It might be a lull before the storm, butā
āI do not.ā He was still gurgling.
āThen you must sack your keeper. Heās not fit to live in the same county with a God-fearinā fox. Anā a vixen, tooāat this time oā year!ā
āDid ye come up on purpose to tell me this?ā
āOf course I did, ye silly man,ā with a stamp of the foot. āWould you not have done as much for me if youād seen that thing happen on my land, now?ā
Forgottenāforgotten was the College and the decency due to elders! McTurk was treading again the barren purple mountains of the rainy West coast, where in his holidays he was viceroy of four thousand naked acres, only son of a three-hundred-year-old house, lord of a crazy fishing-boat, and the idol of his fatherās shiftless tenantry. It was the landed man speaking to his equalādeep calling to deepāand the old gentleman acknowledged the cry.
āI apologize,ā said he. āI apologize unreservedlyāto you, and to the Old Country. Now, will you be good enough to tell me your story?ā
āWe were in your combe,ā McTurk began, and he told his tale alternately as a schoolboy and, when the iniquity of the thing overcame him, as an indignant squire; concluding: āSo you see he must be in the habit of it. Iāweāone never wants to accuse a neighborās man; but I took the liberty in this caseāā
āI see. Quite so. For a reason ye had. Infamousāoh, infamous!ā
The two had fallen into step beside each other on the lawn, and Colonel Dabney was talking as one man to another. āThis comes of promoting a fishermanāa fishermanāfrom his lobster-pots. Itās enough to ruin the reputation of an archangel. Donāt attempt to deny it. It is! Your father has brought you up well. He has. Iād much like the pleasure of his acquaintance. Very much, indeed. And these young gentlemen? English they are. Donāt attempt to deny it. They came up with you, too? Extraordinary! Extraordinary, now! In the present state of education I shouldnāt have thought any three boys would be well enough grounded. But out of the mouths ofāNoāno! Not that by any odds. Donāt attempt to deny it. Yeāre not! Sherry always catches me under the liver, butābeer, now? Eh? What dāyou say to beer, and something to eat? Itās long since I was a boyāabominable nuisances; but exceptions prove the rule. And a vixen, too!ā They were fed on the terrace by a gray-haired housekeeper. Stalky and Beetle merely ate, but McTurk with bright eyes continued a free and lofty discourse; and ever the old gentleman treated him as a brother.
āMy dear man, of course ye can come again. Did I not say exceptions prove the rule? The lower combe? Man, dear, anywhere ye please, so long as you do not disturb my pheasants. The two are not incompatible. Donāt attempt to deny it. Theyāre not! Iāll never allow another gun, though. Come and go as ye please. Iāll not see you, and ye neednāt see me. Yeāve been well brought up. Another glass of beer, now? I tell you a fisherman he was and a fisherman he shall be to-night again. He shall! Wish I could drown him. Iāll convoy you to the Lodge. My people are not preciselyāahābroke to boy, but theyāll know you again.ā
He dismissed them with many compliments by the high Lodge-gate in the split-oak park palings and they stood still; even Stalky, who had played second, not to say a dumb, fiddle, regarding McTurk as one from another world. The two glasses of strong home-brewed had brought a melancholy upon the boy, for, slowly strolling with his hands in his pockets, he crooned:āā Oh, Paddy dear, and did ye hear the news thatās goinā round?ā
Under other circumstances Stalky and Beetle would have fallen upon him, for that song was barred utterlyāanathemaāthe sin of witchcraft. But seeing what he had wrought, they danced round him in silence, waiting till it pleased him to touch earth.
The tea-bell rang when they were still half a mile from College. McTurk shivered and came out of dreams. The glory of his holiday estate had left him. He was a Colleger of the College, speaking English once more.
āTurkey, it was immense!ā said Stalky, generously. āI didnāt know you had it in you. Youāve got us a hut for the rest of the term, where we simply canāt be collared. Fids! Fids! Oh, Fids! I gloat! Hear me gloat!ā
They spun wildly on their heels, jodeling after the accepted manner of a āgloat,ā which is not unremotely allied to the primitive manās song of triumph, and dropped down the hill by the path from the gasometer just in time to meet their housemaster, who had spent the afternoon watching their abandoned hut in the āwuzzy.ā
Unluckily, all Mr. Proutās imagination leaned to the darker side of life, and he looked on those young-eyed cherubims most sourly. Boys that he understood attended house-matches and could be accounted for at any moment. But he had heard McTurk openly deride cricketāeven house-matches; Beetleās views on the honor of the house he knew were incendiary; and he could never tell when the soft and smiling Stalky was laughing at him. Consequentlyāsince human nature is what it isāthose boys had been doing wrong somewhere. He hoped it was nothing very serious, butā¦
āTi-ra-ra-la-i-tu! I gloat! Hear me!ā Stalky, still on his heels, whirled like a dancing dervish to the dining-hall.
āTi-ra-la-la-i-tu! I gloat! Hear me!ā Beetle spun behind him with outstretched arms.
āTi-ra-la-la-i-tu! I gloat! Hear me!ā McTurkās voice cracked.
Now was there or was there not a distinct flavor of beer as they shot past Mr. Prout?
He was unlucky in that his conscience as a housemaster impelled him to consult his associates. Had he taken his pipe and his troubles to little Hartoppās rooms he would, perhaps, have been saved confusion, for Hartopp believed in boys, and knew something about them. His fate led him to King, a fellow housemaster, no friend of his, but a zealous hater of Stalky & Co.
āAh-haa!ā said King, rubbing his hands when the tale was told. āCurious! Now my house never dream of doing these things.ā
āBut you see Iāve no proof, exactly.ā
āProof? With the egregious Beetle! As if one wanted it! I suppose it is not impossible for the Sergeant to supply it? Foxy is considered at least a match for any evasive boy in my house. Of course they were smoking and drinking somewhere. That type of boy always does. They think it manly.ā
āBut theyāve no following in the school, and they are distinctlyāer
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