My Love Taken Over - Carly Jensen (well read books TXT) š
- Author: Carly Jensen
Book online Ā«My Love Taken Over - Carly Jensen (well read books TXT) šĀ». Author Carly Jensen
It was the beginning of sixth grade, Thatās when I saw her standing there. Let me just say I wasnāt looking to date anyone that school yearā¦ Or even make friends for that matter. But as I got farther and farther into the school year, I started making friend after friend after friend. Thatās when I decided to just let the school year lead me through.
I started to sit with a certain group of people every day at lunchā¦ although she wasnāt in that group. I never had the courage to even look her way let alone talk to her or at least attempt too. I never knew what it was about her or why I couldnāt talk to her. So I just kept to myself and bottled up my feelings for her. Each day she would sit with her own group of friends and I would try not to look over thereā¦ It never worked. I would always for some reason not be able to take my eyes off of that table. It drove me insane! I never knew why I couldnāt stop looking over there. But I just let my mind and body do what they pleased its not like I could control what my mind thought aboutā¦ No one can.
Weeks and weeks pasted by I still hadnāt even tried to talk to her, I was to scared. There was just something about her. Was it her beauty? Was it her hair? The clothes she wore? I had no clue. No one had ever done this to me. My mind didnāt know what to think, and neither did I.
It was around the middle of last year. I and the people I sat with at lunch started to fightā¦ next thing I knew me and them were far from being friends. We wereā¦ enemies anymore. Thatās when Alexus came into the picture. She saw that I had no one to sit with at lunch and asked me if I wanted to sit with her and her friends. Little did I knowā¦ the girl that I couldnāt keep my eyes off of sat with Alexus everyday at lunch.
I didnāt know what to say do or think. I spoke without thinking and said āYeah sureā
When lunch time came I was completely terrified. I didnāt know what I would say or do. I was so terrified I couldnāt even think straight. Standing in line at lunch seemed to have taken forever. When I got my lunch I looked for the tableā¦ when I spotted it I was terrified beyond this world. It took me a little while to get the courage up to go over there. When I got to the table Alexus said āHey girlā and introduced me to the whole group. First was Mathew, then Armandoā¦ then it was her. I was so terrified. I didnāt say anything except hi the whole lunch.
After a couple lunch periods I started to talk more often and start conversations. But for some reasonā¦ When ever she was talking I got this feeling inside of me. I didnāt know what it was or how to make it go away. Truth is it wouldnāt go away no matter what I did.
She and I started to talk as the weeks flew by. I found myself stuttering a lot. But for some weird reason I only stuttered when I was talking to her. It was like she had me under a spell. But what spell? I didnāt know. All I knew is I would sweat and stutter when I talked to her. I didnāt get it at all! It was the middle of winter and I was sweating while talking to her! By this time I swore that she had me under some type of spell. But I still didnāt know what type of spell this girl had me underā¦ and the fact that it was only her that made me act this way.
After sitting with them all for about 2 months I was talking much more. But still stuttered and sweated when I was talking to herā¦ Or even just heard her talk. By this time I thought I was completely insane. I didnāt trust myself around her. I couldnāt figure out for the life of me why I acted this way around herā¦ or why I stuttered, sweated. I couldnāt even figure out why my head was in a cluster! My own mind and I couldnāt figure it out!
11:45 rolled around and that means lunch time. I was still very confused and nervous around her and with the whole situation itself. When I got my lunch I slowly walked up to the table nervous and shaky as could be like always. Everyone says hey and I say hey back and the conversations begin. Same as always I started to sweat and stare at her. Some days she would ask what Iām staring at and I just froze. I didnāt know what to say I just sat there stunned, nervous and scared. I asked my self over and over what should you say. I never got an answer. My mind was in such a cluster. I couldnāt answer herā¦ so I just got up and threw my tray away. That went on for weeks and weeks.
That night I went home and lay on my bed and thought about everything she causes me to go through. At first I had no clue what it could be about her that had gotten me this way. I had no clue stillā¦ then it hit me right square in the faceā¦ā¦ā¦ I had fallen in love with her.
The next day I kept trying to understand how I could have fallen in love with a complete stranger to me. Itās possible though I told myself. But then I thoughtā¦ā¦ why her? I didnāt know. But what ever the reason was didnāt matter. I liked the feelingā¦ā¦ I no longer cared that I basically suffered around her. It was a good type of suffering. I liked itā¦ā¦ I donāt know why but I really liked it.
There was just one problem though I didnāt know if she was straight or bisexual. When I realized that I just felt like crying. I could feel my eyes start to tear up. And this wasnāt a happy cry either. I told myself that I would have to find out that information some how. But how? I realized then that as time went by we would get closer and closer.
Sure enough I was right by almost the end of the year we were best friends. We were like a monkey and a banana. We were like un-spreadable.
Time went by week after week. It was after lunch one say when a sudden urge came over me to go over to Hannahās desk. I wasnāt about to fight myself this time. When I went over there she was in the middle of talking to someone on yahoo. I asked her who she was talking to and thatās when it happened. She said āIām talking to my GF.ā
I asked her āYour bi?ā
She said āYes but shhhhh I donāt want everyone knowing yetā
So I didnāt say anything. Inside I was jumping up and down with excitement. I found out that she was like me Bi. I was speechless. In a good way of courseā¦ but wow was I happy.
Days and days pastā¦ I still had no clue how to tell her I liked her way more then a friend. I didnāt even know if I should tell her or if it was better of being a secret. I thought to myself of what could happen if I told her. There were of course good and bad results as there are in most situationsā¦ but this situation was a BIG deal for me. I didnāt just want to open my mouth and ruin everythingā¦ but at the same time I wanted to tell her so very bad. But she already had a GF and she seemed happy with her at the moment beingā¦ so I just kept my mouth shut.
A couple of weeks had gone by sense I found out about Hannah being Bi. My emotions for her kept building up in me, I felt like I was going to explode! But I kept telling myself to calm down and take a
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