How to Talk to Anyone (Junior Talker #5) - DeYtH Banger (korean ebook reader txt) 📗
- Author: DeYtH Banger
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Note: I like the more you click the more this fucked up faggot gets violent...
Photographer as Witness: A Portrait of Domestic Violence
Maggie had two children, Memphis, age 2, and Kayden, age 4. Maggie had separated from their father several months prior to beginning her relationship with Shane.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz3 of 46One month into their courtship, Shane had Maggie's name tattooed on his neck in large black letters.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz4 of 46Shane had been trying to make a career as a singer in a Christian rock band while providing for Maggie and her children.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz5 of 46While Shane's relationship with Memphis was decidedly less confrontational than his relationship with Kayden, he still found his new role as a caregiver to two small children to be challenge to his patience. "I'm just trying to do the right thing by them," he said of Maggie and her children. "I'm trying to be a father to them."
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz6 of 46Shane's relationship with Memphis was far less conflicted than his relationship with her brother, Kayden. He would constantly lavish attention and affection on Memphis, while his interactions with Kayden were decidedly more ambivalent.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz7 of 46Within a few months of their relationship, Shane moved Maggie and her children to a trailer park in Somerset, Ohio. The location was farther away than Maggie had ever been from her family and friends before, and she said her feelings of isolation only increased over time.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz8 of 46Kayden lifted a chair and a toy truck over his head to show how strong he was. His relationship with Shane was contentious at best, and at times he displayed open mistrust and hostility toward his mother's boyfriend.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz9 of 46A trip to the barbershop designed to provide a moment of male bonding for Shane and Kayden could not dissolve the tension between them.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz10 of 46Shane and Kayden had a strained relationship from the beginning, with Shane trying to exert a strong parental presence and Kayden resisting the authoritative efforts of a man he knew was not his father.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz11 of 46Maggie would often say that she could sense the competition between Kayden and Shane, and often felt that she was caught between their separate demands for her affection and attention.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz12 of 46Shane attepts to restrain Kayden so the barber could cut the back of his hair. "He needs a male role model. I'm trying to be that," Shane said.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz13 of 46The stress of Shane's unemployment and raising two young children on very little money often took its toll on the relationship. As the newness of their relationship wore off, they began to argue more frequently, usually about money or how Maggie focused most of her energy on the children rather than her relationship. "Why can't I be the most important one, for once?" Shane asked.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz14 of 46One night, after an early birthday celebration for Memphis at a local fast food restaurant, the two began to argue. Shane said his main source of frustration stemmed from the fact that Maggie paid more attention to the children than she did to him.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz15 of 46Shane and Maggie argued in their car. Maggie's inability to devote as much attention to Shane as she devoted to her children became a constant source of strife between the two.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz16 of 46Maggie and Shane took a rare night out alone together, singing karaoke at a local bar.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz17 of 46After a night out at a local bar, Maggie left after becoming jealous of when another woman flirted with Shane. Upon arriving home, Shane flew into a rage, angry that Maggie had "abandoned him" at the bar and then drove home with his friend, whose house they were staying at for the week. Maggie told him to get out of the house, that he was too angry and that he would wake the children.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz18 of 46Rather than subsiding, Shane's anger began to grow, and he screamed that Maggie had betrayed him, at one point accusing his friend (not pictured) of trying to pursue her sexually.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz19 of 46At one point, Shane picked Maggie up and flung her back into the kitchen as she tried to run out of the room.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz20 of 46As the fight continued to rage, Shane told Maggie that she could choose between getting beaten in the kitchen, or going with him to the basement so they could talk privately.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz21 of 46When Maggie refused, Shane began grabbing her by the face and neck, choking her. "You can either get beat up here, or we can go talk alone," he said. "Your choice."
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz22 of 46As Shane and Maggie continued to fight, Memphis ran into the room and refused to leave Maggie's side. She witnessed the majority of the assault on her mother. As the two fought, Memphis began to scream and stomp her feet.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz23 of 46Shane continued to scream in Maggie's face as Memphis wedged herself between them. At some point, the toddler had stopped crying and began trying to soothe her weeping mother.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz24 of 46Around half past midnight, the police arrived after receiving a call from a resident in the house (pictured at right). Maggie cried and smoked a cigarette as an officer from the Lancaster Police Department tried to keep her separated from Shane and coax out the truth about the
assault.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz25 of 46Shane hugged Memphis goodbye before being arrested. He insisted he wasn't a bad person and that Maggie had been trying to leave the house and drive drunk with the children in the car.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz26 of 46Shane pled with Maggie not to let the police take him into custody, crying out, "Please, Maggie, I love you, don't let them take me, tell them I didn't do this!"
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz27 of 46An officer from the Lancaster Police Department photographed the bruises on Maggie's neck from where Shane had choked her. "You know, he's not going to stop," the officer told Maggie as she wept. "They never stop. They usually stop when they kill you."
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz28 of 46Convincing Maggie to be examined and sign a protection order took a great deal of coaxing from the officer. "I don't want to get him in trouble," she wept. "You aren't getting him into trouble. He got himself into trouble. I know Shane. He's a good guy, but he knows better than to do this," the officer replied.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz29 of 46Overwhelmed by her nerves and the shock of the abuse she suffered, Maggie became sick to her stomach.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz
Maggie tried to pull herself together as she prepared to drive with her children to her best friend's house for the night.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz31 of 46Kayden, who had slept through the assault, was disoriented and began to cry when he awoke. Memphis remained calm and seemed mostly concerned with comforting her mother. "Don't cry mommy, I love you," she said over and over.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz32 of 46Maggie wept on her best friend Amy's sofa after the attack. "I hate him so much," she whispered.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz33 of 46The day following the attack, Maggie had to grapple with what would come next for her and her children. She had no source of income, no childcare, and was afraid to return to the home she and Shane shared to retrieve her possessions. She expressed intense fear that Shane would be let out on bail and come after her, and called the jail several times to make sure he hadn't been released.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz34 of 46Maggie sat in front of her best friend Amy's house and smoked the morning after the assault, while Kayden and Amy's daughter Olivia, age 3, played in the window.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz35 of 46Memphis sat on the floor of her aunt's home crying for Maggie after having woken up from a nap. She witnessed most of the attack on her mother. "I want her to know that it's not okay for someone to treat you that way, that you don't ever deserve to be treated that way," Maggie said.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz36 of 46In the days following the attack, Maggie had time to reflect on what had occurred and decided to make an official statement to the police. She said she had resumed communications with her estranged husband and the father of her children, and was considering moving with her children to Alaska, where he is stationed with the Army.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz37 of 46Overwhelmed by frustration at a long flight delay, as well as by the prospect of transporting two small children all the way to Anchorage, Maggie closed her eyes and tried to calm herself down. Her grandfather had been given special permission by the airport to come to the gate to help her care for Memphis and Kayden. After a flight delay that lasted several hours, they were told the flight had been cancelled and were sent home. They flew to Anchorage the following day.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz38 of 46Memphis stood in front of an illuminated advertisement at the Port Columbus International Airport, waiting to fly to Alaska with her mother and brother to be with her father. Memphis' father is a soldier who is currently stationed in Anchorage. "I want us to be a family again," Maggie said. "[He] has been so understanding about everything, he wants to take care of us. I'm really lucky."
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz39 of 46Maggie and Memphis, March 3, 2013. More than three months since the assault, Maggie has moved her family to Alaska to try to repair her marriage and give the children a chance to be closer to their father. Maggie and her husband met at 14. She said theyÕd been on and off since eighth grade, yet they always seem to find their way back to one another.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz40 of 46Maggie and Kayden, four, share a moment in the apartment they now share with Maggie's husband, Zane.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz41 of 46Because of his deployment and his period of separation from Maggie, Zane had only met his daughter Memphis once before she moved into his home in Alaska. He has embraced his new responsibilities as a father.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz42 of 46Kayden’s relationship with his father was diametrically opposed to his relationship with Shane. The two acted like playmates, but Zane had very few problems getting Kayden to respect his role as a parental figure. “He just respects Zane,” Maggie said of Kayden. “He didn’t respect Shane. He never really liked him.”
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz43 of 46Maggie sat on the bathroom floor and cried after arguing with Zane. The two had fought with some regularity over her relationship with Shane, and although he had said he forgave her, Zane often had a difficult time letting go of his resentment. “I’m tired of apologizing,” Maggie said. “[Zane] cheated on me, I left him. It was a mistake. But when does it get easier?”
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz44 of 46The couple had argued the previous evening, and in an apparent attempt to make amends, Zane had offered to paint Maggie's toenails. They didn't exchange many words, and they didn't discuss the argument or offer apologies or excuses — they simply sat together as a movie played in the background.
Sara Naomi Lewkowiczi Lewkowicz—Sara Lewkowicz45 of 46The morning after their argument, Maggie and Zane embraced in bed. The two have a host of trust issues to work through, as well as their own traumas to move past. "We've been together since we were 14," Maggie said. "It's hard not to have baggage after six years." Maggie is hopeful that she and Zane will be able to move past their problems, saying that somehow, they've always managed to find their way back to each other.
Sara Naomi Lewkowicz
(On June 25, 2013, Sara Naomi Lewkowicz won the 2013 Ville de Perpignan Rémi Ochlik Award for her work documenting Domestic Violence, to be awarded later this year at Visa Pour l'Image in Perpignan.
Photographer Sara Naomi Lewkowicz has continued to document the story of Maggie and her life since November 2012, when she was the victim of a violent attack by her now ex-boyfriend Shane. In an assignment for TIME in March 2013, Lewkowicz visited Maggie and her family in Alaska to document their life as they continue to move on from the incident. Click here to jump to the newest images added to the story and here to see a
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