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to tell you I loved you. Because every part of me thought this would be the end.”

She picked up a piece of paper and handed it to me. I began to read it, I started to cry, “I didn’t want to be happy with Karli, I wanted to be happy with you.”

She looked up at me. “And are you?”

I nodded my head. “I always have been, but I must admit I am much happier knowing that you’re really mine.”

She smiled at me “And now you can tell everyone I am.” I just hope things happen differently this time. No cheating…, no secrets nothing can mess up something as beautiful as this. She stood up and pulled me away from the edge. “Come on, we know we don’t have to jump. As long as we have each other.

We walked back to my house and collapsed on my bed, to tired to do anything more. I wrapped my arms around her and fell asleep.

She was lying in my arms with her eyes closed; hopefully she was having happy dreams and not an insane nightmare.

I was sitting there for a moment before remembering being back at the hospital and how… I love Luke is what she said when she thought it was the end. Having that thought just made me wrap my arms around her tighter. I felt her begin to move and I look down at her. “Hey Baby girl.”

She smiled up at me. “Hey my nerd.”

She could always make me blush. Actually she was the only person who had ever made me blush. I leaned down and kissed her softly.

Andi<3
Do you ever think about the people in your life now… and if they will be in your life when you’re older? That’s what I was thinking. Luke’s in my life now as my boyfriend… but will he be that in the future? Will he be more? Will he be less? Will he be there? Couples last for years and still sometimes in the end, they break up. That’s what a divorce is. Duh. But would that be the case of me and Luke? Or would something mess that up before we even get to the future. When I say the future, I’m not simply speaking of tomorrow or next week. I’m speaking of years. When we’re out of school; and we have to live for real, will he be apart of my future?

“How did you sleep baby?” he looked down and smiled at me.

“I slept perfectly boo. How about you?”

He glanced up at the ceiling and started blushing. “I didn’t sleep. I was watching you sleep.”

I smiled. “November 14th”

“Hehe what about it babe?”

“I wrote you something (:”

He giggled “I would love to hear it.”

Now it was my turn to blush, “ok Wilson.” I took a piece of paper out of my pocket and started to read it to him. “Oh Heyy (: this isn’t a big deal…but you know me so I thought I would write you something to tell you happy birthday.. Also to prove I love you more than any bitch ever will<3 hehe so first off happy birthday boo I love yuh bunches… more than I could ever scream…<3 not much to say but happy birthday and I hope you get everything you want….your amazing and don’t you let anyone forget that<3
He’s perfectly imperfect<3
-Love AndiBoo<3 F&A
11/14/11(:”

I looked over at him and he was laughing. “That was cuute baby girl”

I smiled. “Well wait, I have a little bit more. Dear Lukas Scott Wilson
How have you been? Been awhile since I’ve wrote you anything but since it’s your birthday I think you deserve something new… I miss you all the time and it’s impossible to get you off my mind<3 the most memorable moments I’ve ever had; have had something to do with you<3 I haven’t stopped loving you and I wont ever. Consider that a promise (: whatever happens just know I’m here for you and your always going to be the rightful owner of my heart<3”

I glanced up at him and he smiled a humongous smile. “I can’t believe I almost lost you.” He shook his head and tackled me onto his bed. “Promise me, you will never ever do something as stupid as that again!!”

I started laughing and never replied, well he noticed. His face turned serious and he held me against the bed. “Baby girl…. Please promise me, I will never have to worry about you doing something like that again.” I felt something warm land on my cheek. I stared up and seen that he had tears rolling off his face.

With some effort I leaned up and kissed him. “I promise Luke, you’ll never have to worry about loosing me….” He smiled. “As long as I don’t lose you.” I whispered.

He took a deep breath and let me up. His eyes turned from happiness to sorrow….. “Andi…. I can’t promise that we will make it forever, and I can’t promise that you won’t get over me, or that something bad won’t happen and I won’t die….. But I need to know that if for some terrible reason we didn’t make it…. I need you to promise that you wouldn’t let that be the end… I mean of your life, I need you to promise me that you will be ok and no matter what happens, you always be in my life…. As a friend… if not more.”

I wrapped my arms around him. “I couldn’t promise you that…..Lukas, when we weren’t together I almost lost it…. I was so close to suicide so many times, the only thing that stopped me was when you would smile at me, and tell me even though you were dating someone else, that you would always be mine….. it killed me to see you with Karli especially more than any of them…. Karli was my best friend….. And you were…. You are the boy I am in love with

He started to cry, “Baby girl, I am done with all of them, I don’t want anything to do with any of them, especially not Karli.”

I took a deep breath and glanced up at him and half smiled. “Ok boo….I promise that I will never do anything as stupid as cutting myself or trying to jump off the edge ever again.” I reached up and wiped away his tears.

“man I feel pathetic.” He stared down at the ground.

I hugged him tight, “Why?”

He looked into my eyes. “Because I’m a boy, boys aren’t supposed to cry… they’re supposed to stay strong and hold the one’s they love when they’re upset…..”

I kissed his forehead. “Lukas, there’s nothing wrong with you crying, I hold you when your upset and crying and you hold me when I’m upset and crying. I love the fact that your not a hard ass and you cry. It means your sensitive and that’s one of the many things I love about you.”

He looked over at me and half smiled, “what do you love about me?”

I had been waiting for this. I put my hand on my tummy and started to speak. “The way only you can give me butterflies when you say hey, or my ringtone for you starts to play. You always stand up for me, no matter what the situation is, you’re always there. I love how you make promises and when we’re texting and you tell me you love me, you always add extra letters…. A heart and a smiley face. I love the way you blush when I write you a new poem. The way I can feel you smiling when we kiss and the way that you always come up behind me and wrap your arms around me. When I want to cry, you’re always there and turn those unwanted tears into smiles. I love how you can cry in front of me, and you can be yourself… how sweet you are. And even though you make mistakes; I love how it is impossible to not forgive you….. And I love, how you always know the perfect thing to say <3 “

I looked over at him and I could see his eyes were wet with tears. “What I love about you baby girl. You have the cutest nicknames for me, you always make me feel amazing, and when I’m with you I hate the thought of you leaving, when you leave I want to hook on to your legs like a little kid and beg you to stay here with me. I love how understanding you are about everything. The fact that through all of this, you never gave up on me, even when you had a million people telling you too….your always tell me you’re here for me, and you really are…. And everything that you just said can be added to my list.<3”

I started to cry. There was just no word possible to tell him what he made me feel, or what he meant to me….

I lunged towards him and refused to let go. “Well I want to add one more thing to our lists.” I loved the way our lists sounded. He nodded his head. “When you say you’ll never let go…. I love that.; you hug me or hold me and I say I wish we could stay like this forever, and you look at me, and go…. Why can’t we?”

He blushed and it melted my heart. “I love how only you can make me blush <3”

We finally stood up. “Holy shit.” He whispered as he pulled open the front door.

“What is it boo?” I asked peeking beside him.

He turned around and pushed me against the wall, kissing me gently and wrapping his arms around my waist. “I forgot there was an outside world, being here with you was all I needed.” He pulled away gasping for air as I giggled. “Damn Baby girl, you need to stop being so amazing, it’s causing me to take kiss you till I can’t breath.”

“sorry babe, I can’t help it that I’m so amazing.” I muttered as I stuck my tongue out at him.

He laughed and moved closer to me. “You going to tease me now?”

I nodded my head and stuck my tongue out farther. He moved closer and licked my tongue. “Fine, I can tease to.” I laughed and tried to kiss him, but he pulled away. “Ah ah, ima tease too.”

I wrapped my arms around him. “Maybe so, but I’m a much better tease, and I can make you yearn for me.”

He shook his head. “Damn can’t do it.” He leaned over and started to kiss me. I smiled and reached into his pocket and grabbed his phone. He wrapped his arms around me tighter, as I turned on camera mode. He pulled back and stuck his tongue out at me. I reached over with my tongue and touched his, taking a picture just as a tear began to fall down my face.

He kissed my cheek. “Please tell me those are tears of joy.”

I smiled and nodded my head, “I promise boo, they are.”

He reached out his pinky. “Pinky promise Love?”

I reached my pinky and wrapped it around his, “ya boo, I pinky promise.” He smiled and laughed “good. Now, I know for a fact you haven’t eaten anything, and I am going to make you.”

I rolled my eyes.
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