Incidence Of Love: Demystified And Decoded - Santosh Jha (books to read for teens .TXT) 📗

world, its over 7 billion people and their collective as well as individual status are also a super-positioned realism. It is both good and bad; and billion shades of various mixes of the twin elements of good and bad. It depends on the ‘observer’, who may accept it either way!

Therefore, what physics as well as spiritualism keeps telling us is – realism is always neutral. This world, all tangibles and especially the intangibles are neither good nor bad. This world always had good elements as well as bad elements and they keep balancing each other. For an individual as well as collectivity, good or bad depends on how one aligns with elements in the milieus…

Similar is the superpositioning of the competing hypotheses that love is shrinking, people are no more good enough for love and intimacy and the opposite that this world is now a better place for love to sustain and flourish.

Goodness and badness are just elements in somehow super-positioned pure state. If an individual aligns with good elements, his or her current / ‘observer’ status makes him or her accept the world as good and enjoyable. The same person, if he or she aligns with bad elements, the ‘observer’ status changes and he same world becomes bad. Same is the situation with love. It is about how we align with the energy of love.

So, the finality of judgment about the culpability of this world, love, relationships, actions/behaviors etc remains on the side of the ‘observer’ – the individual. Often, if a localized milieu seems good or bad, it is basically because of how society, cultures, economy, politics and psychology align with what elements of the larger cosmos…

If in all probabilities, the culpability is with individuals and the collectivity they create together; every single ‘observer’ has a fair share in this collective sense of good or bad. However, it is great pain and perturbation to find and accept that there are people, who are not well endowed and empowered and that is why, they have to face so much troubles in life, which they can easily avoid and even turn these challenges into opportunities, if they had it...

It is greater pain to find and accept that there are truly endowed, empowered and really beautiful men and women, who have everything to turn the challenges of their lives into opportunities but what they miss is not the tangibility, but the intangibility of ‘cognitive chemistry’, which is applied, can make them land in bliss and wellness...

It is such a joy that we live in times, which the world accepts as the ‘best possible times’ for humanity as surely, we have milieus around us, which are facilitative and amicable, compared to times only a few decades back. Also, more people, especially our dear women are now more empowered and truly endowed...

Why then such crisis, conflict, confusion and resultant pain and perturbations...?

This is why we need to talk about this very critical element of ‘Cognitive Chemistry’...

I have always insisted the old and very objective realism that this world, the socio-cultural milieus around us and elements that affect our life-living experiences are neither good nor bad but objectively neutral. Often, more often than we accept; good or bad is our ‘cognitive conundrum’. Pain and joys are often very subjective, emanating out of our ‘cognitive crisis’. That is why it is very important to understand the ‘cognitive chemistry’ of our consciousness – this sense of ‘I’ or ‘self’...

There is a clichéd, which is like – ‘If you wish to be successful in life, you have to learn to say NO’. The reverse of this is also equally popular. The fact remains, everyone has to learn to say ‘YES’ and ‘NO’ but the artistry is not only in mouthing them but in applying this energy of ‘Affirmation’ and ‘Negation’ at appropriate Place, Time and Manner.

The very word ‘management’ is all about the ‘judiciousness of delivery’. A brilliant life-manager has this golden artistry of knowing appropriately, ‘When, Where, Why, Who and How’. Judgment of appropriateness of delivery is some artistry, nobody is born with; it is learnt and is perfected by practice…

This is not new. Everyone does this judgment of ‘When, Where, Why, Who and How’. Also, we need to accept that we always have two core choices about all judgments of our life about ‘When, Where, Why, Who and How’ – It is either ‘Yes’ or ‘No...

Here comes the ‘cognitive chemistry’...

Excellence, solutions, bliss, confidence and all other goodies of life is about how appropriately our ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ fit into our scheme of things. If there is a situation, when a ‘Yes’ is required and we in our judgment opt for ‘No’, life-living experiences are different for us, compared to what it could have been, if we opted for ‘Yes’...

Most importantly, both set of probabilities, or what we may call destinies, whether following a ‘Yes’ or a ‘No’, are neutral and objective, They are neither good or bad. However, we accept them as good or bad or they actually turn into good or bad consequences for us is all very subjective for us, at a given time and space only....

Therefore, all realism – good or bad, are often our perceptions, call it our cognitive conundrum. For the cosmos, or the macrocosmic world, Oxygen and Carbon dioxide are both value-neutral, neither good nor bad. It is for humans that Oxygen is good and Carbon dioxide is killer. Therefore, all life-living situations draw their labels of good or bad as per our subjective cognition and subjective judgment of a realism...

That is what we have to accept and feel happy about. The happy thing in all probabilities of life is that they themselves are neither good or bad. Something is good or bad because of someone’s subjective positioning at a particular time and space...

Yes, no doubt, there are actual bad things and they are commonly bad for all people and all lives, and they are very much tangible. Such tangible troubles like cancer disease or an unfortunate mishap, etc are bad and universal. However, we all can see and accept that most of our troubles do not fall in such tangible categories...

What we are talking about is situations like – ‘I am a fat girl, no one loves me, I have bad loans to pay, my parents are not supportive, my career is doomed, my lover ditched me, life is tough for me, I am a huge failure, etc...

Here comes this need of understanding and accepting the idea of ‘cognitive chemistry’...

Often, with anyone, life offers this situation to take a call. You have to make a judicious choice between ‘Yes’ and ‘No’. Remember, to be human is to err and learn from mistakes. Still, making a judicious choice is crucial, after accepting that judicious choices come only when we objectively test our cognitive prudence. That needs to sit down, opt for leisure, break the issue at hand into smaller details and test the probabilities of all details in terms of their consequences if you say ‘Yes’ and if you say ‘No’...

It is all about acceptance of the simple facts –

Most life situations are neutral; we perceive them as good or bad...

We have to be objective and non-emotional, when we make judgments about ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ about a life-living choice...

All probabilities and consequences of both ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ are also neutral, neither good nor bad. We need to accept them with objective cognitive prudence...

Cognitive realism – the perception of good or bad is often a subjective realism in time-space domain. As Time and Space change, realism about good and bad changes too...

Our brain is essentially an actionable entity, led primarily by our thought processing. That is why we all are geniuses out of reactionary priorities. Cognitive prudence is all about procrastinating the reactionary priorities and settle for a ‘receptive’ mind consciousness, which has the leisure and time-space maneuverability to objectively test the validities of ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ choices...

Most importantly, we need to accept that in contemporary milieus, where everything is so charged up and life speed is made to be calamitously high, it is our primary mammalian brain (limbic system, which deals with emotions and short-term memory), which dominates our cognitive prudence. This we need to change...

We are humans and humans have excellence of solutions of all troubles because we have a superior brain part called cortex area, which has been assigned the higher cognitive functions. Limbic system-backed cognition is so programmed for reactionary and short-term reward and consumption that limbic-cognition often makes us accept subjective judgments. This we have to be wary of...

To align our cognition to higher brain consciousness is some artistry, we all need to evolve to. This creates a ‘cognitive chemistry’ for us, which makes us have objective and logical judicious life-living choices. This is surely superior to emotional and subjective life-living choices, which lands us in most troubles, pains and perturbations...

This cognitive chemistry must be made to work at its best when we ready ourselves for reception of the incidence of love. Love must always meet your higher consciousness. Often, love is made to encounter with our mammalian-brain led auto-mode consciousness of reward and punishment. This we need to be wary of. Love must always meet the higher cognition.

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CHAPTER 10

Why The Young Men And Women Are Reluctant To Get

Married And Fear of Not Getting Mr. or Ms. Right…

The questions of life and living have a mystically magical date with milieus. Milieus, themselves are not independent realism as this intangibility of collective perceptions often create this tangibility of milieus…!

The question, which is well there in the cultural milieu and has a rather mystical aura to it, is – “Why the young Men and Women are reluctant to get Married…?”

Somehow, the right or logically appropriate answer is still evolving as the question itself is just in its inception. Still, the talk is everywhere that young ones are not very inclined to marriage, especially young women, who are empowered and independent!

Before we attempt to answer this evolving question, let us first spare some precious time for a passage below, which shall probably help in delving into the perspectives of the question. No question of life is isolated from other questions. That is why, a holistic perspective about life-living and milieus may be rightfully appropriate here to understand the nature and scope of the question at hand – “Why the young men and women are reluctant to get married…?”

Do kindly let the passage below sink in… what sinks in, stays…

“The dawn was still processing its registry… the birds had though geared up for the day… flowers stirring and looking eastward set to welcome their beloved Sun… A boy was awake too, marshalling his goats. He could clearly hear him singing in his pastoral best shrieking tone…

“He sat by the window of his house watching and enjoying the blank sky. The grey sky would gradually turn crimson and finally golden. The darkness of the sky was what he was enjoying. He had a feeling it would look wonderful as and when dawn would herald its inevitable arrival...

“He reminisced and smiled. How many times in his life, he found and cherished loads of purposes. He smiled because he realized how important stupidities of life are... how they extend you the chance to be wise. How people miss the relevance of stupidities as catalyst of wisdom.

“He recalled the efforts and pain he had to invest in the preparedness for attaining his purposes at different stages of his life. And look at the brilliance of the conspiracy of almighty; whenever he prepared hard and meticulously for a purpose he wanted to attain, he would invariably fail. He would feel bad, low and frustrated about the wastage of his investments. Most of his successes came when he had done the least preparation and was not even sure of the purpose...

“He had finally accepted; preparation and purpose had a strange relationship. He wished to come to terms with the realization that preparation for a purpose is a misnomer. The